Mr.

Hey Folks, I lost my youngest Daughter to a fatal  wreck August 8, 2019. Her 18 month old Son was also in the  and he suffered major head and multiple injuries but, he survived and is now living with my wife and me. Then, I was diagnosed with throat cancer last September. After 8 weeks of chemo and radiation, I'm on the painful healing  now. To relieve anxiety from opioids to manage my pain, I was prescribed lorazepam .5mg every 8 hours. In December, I bumped up my dosage on my own to 2 pills (1mg) every 8 hours. BIG MISTAKE!!! I ran out just before Christmas which is when I began feeling withdrawal symptoms. 10 times worse than the anxiety from the hydrocodone and fentanyl patch. So now, I'm doing research on how to get off this drug. I am now only taking 2 pills a day (.5mg).

I'm afraid to stop taking it because of what I went through that night. I deal with waves of depression and anxiety on a daily basis. Thoughts of losing my shit always seems to lurk like a dark cloud over my head. I'm here just looking for advice and an ear.

Hello Papastone247, welcome to BenzoBuddies,

We are glad you are joining our community.  I am sad to read what you have been through in the last couple of years, little wonder that you are having such issues with anxiety and depression.  Unfortunately, long-term benzo use isn't the answer.

We support a slow taper from benzos for the very reason you described when you ran out of pills.  A reduction of no more than 5-10%  of your total daily dose every two weeks or so tends to minimize symptoms and allow one to stay functional.  This link will take you to taper plans to consider:

Planning Your Withdrawal (Taper Plans)

This link is for withdrawl support:

Withdrawal Support (during your taper)

I know you've got a lot on your plate but I hope you will get active in our community for the information and support.  Let us know how we can help you.

Best and again, welcome,

Kate

Hi Papastone247   welcome from me too.

How very sad reading your post, what you’ve had to deal with, over last few years, my heart goes out to you.    So very tragic losing your daughter, that’s something you will never get over, you have to learn to live with the pain.  It must be tough for you caring for your grandson, although he must bring you some comfort, I hope he is doing okay! 

I am sorry you’re now dealing with benzo withdrawal symptoms as well!  It will get better.  As Kate said Benzodiazepines long term is not the answer!  I am glad you are looking to taper off these drugs, you will get plenty of support and encouragement here.

You might want to check out the Anxiety and Depression boards and post questions! You can connect with others who can offer some ideas and help.

Anxiety     

Depression   

Lets know if you need any help

Magrita