Can someone explain how your wrinkles look on your face from withdraw

Hello all.

 

The muscle wasting is probably secondary to cortisol produced in excess as part of withdrawal. Cortisol binds to skeletal muscle and causes wasting quite separate from any muscle bulk lost through malnutrition or non-use.

 

It is a catabolic hormone that enables muscle protein to be converted into glucose or glycogen as a result of chronic stress. It also reduces protein formation in muscle cells and connective tissue(collagen), thins the skin, and reduces bone mass.

 

Think over-trained long-distance runner(or long-distance benzo withdrawal).

 

And the good news is, when the cortisol goes away, given adequate dietary protein and a bit of exercise, this is all REVERSIBLE.

 

We will be beautiful again. Or, in my case, a slightly less hag-ridden, wrinkly crone.

Hi Carebear16

 

The funny part is, I've read many posts about people with skin pain (burning), and I've muttered to myself that I would take that any day over the ghoul like appearance. My rational is that I'm suffering with so many internal physiological problems (cog fog, exhaustion during the day, crippling neck and back pain, joint pain etc, etc) and I'm able to hide it from everyone. I just grin and bear it. No one really knows unless I tell them. But I can't hide my shocking appearance. I have to explain to people I haven't seen in awhile that I don't have cancer or anything; I'm suffering from a largely unknown condition known as benzo withdrawal. I hate that everyone I know is watching me whither before their eyes. It scares my family and that makes me sad. I don't want to burden anyone with my problem. It's my cross to bear. I wish all my symptoms could be internal.

That being said, I don't have the skin burning and I don't know first hand how much your are suffering. I would never judge you because I have not walked in your shoes. I pray that we all heal and return to our former selves. This is a terrible experience for us, but we are lucky we have each other. 

Hello Hope.

 

Trust me; it will all be OK in time. The connective tissue reforms, the wrinkles even out, the muscles grow back.

 

See my post above yours.

 

spartacus

Hello Hope.

 

Trust me; it will all be OK in time. The connective tissue reforms, the wrinkles even out, the muscles grow back.

 

See my post above yours.

 

spartacus

 

Have you returned to normal ( if this was a prob for you)? And I hope the gray hair disappears too!

Hello Spring,

 

I'm not yet off diazepam...still 0.8 to go.

 

As for returning to normal, well, I'm nearly three years older than when this began. I shall find a new me under the Christmas tree.

 

I am certain she will have muscles. I can make those. But the collagen? At my age it was making a run for the floor anyway so here I am much less certain. I shall wear my scars with pride...and high-necks, scarves, long sleeves, gloves, mid-length skirts, knee-high boots...

 

In this context, I may retain the bag over my head for all time. I've grown accustomed to my face but others tend to look a tad gobsmacked and Raybans don't cut it any more. I could always wear them over the bag.

 

The hair thing...I'm reluctant to disappear any hair whatever its colour...I just want it to thicken up and stop behaving like Wurzel Gummidge on speed.

 

Trust me...it will be spectacular.

 

spartacus

 

 

I am off 26 months and my face has just started to improve.  Yes it will get better.  Its like my whole face lifted and now the wrinkles that had formed under my cheeks are going away.  I lost 10 years this last month.    It comes back.  I had looked pretty bad.  Even my eyes are starting to get that sparkle again.  Linder

Hi Spartacus and Linder

Thank you for the affirmation. I needed that.

 

Spartacus - I relate to the bag over the head remedy. I shouldn't be, but I am very ashamed of my appearance now. I want to hide but I have to go to work everyday. I'm lucky that I am able to work since I've read about many poor souls who had to give up their jobs. I have to pay the bills, but I hate going there and pretending that I'm not suffering. I don't want them to know how messed up I am because we're downsizing rapidly and I wouldn't want to be on anyone's list.

 

Linder - thank you again for the update on your improvements. You've communicated with me before, and I love reading about your progress. It gives me so much hope.  I'll be happy when I can be me again. I really hate looking like Beetlejuice

I can so relate to the wrinkles and loss of  muscle tone and wasting, it happened to me during withdrawal, I was so shocked, I would push on the skin on my calves and it would totally wrinkle like there was no muscle left underneath and I developed wrinkles on my upper lip almost over night

Well I can happily report that it is all starting to improve at eight months off,  my calf muscles have tone back, no wrinkling skin and the wrinkles on my upper lip are hardly noticeable to me now. My skin is improving and my hair which became very thin is unfortunately still thin on top but the texture is improving.

Have faith and give it some time, if it can improve for me and I am in my 60,s it will certainly improve for you younger folks and you have time on your side

Ladygrace12

Hi Spartacus and Linder

Thank you for the affirmation. I needed that.

 

Spartacus - I relate to the bag over the head remedy. I shouldn't be, but I am very ashamed of my appearance now. I want to hide but I have to go to work everyday. I'm lucky that I am able to work since I've read about many poor souls who had to give up their jobs. I have to pay the bills, but I hate going there and pretending that I'm not suffering. I don't want them to know how messed up I am because we're downsizing rapidly and I wouldn't want to be on anyone's list.

 

Linder - thank you again for the update on your improvements. You've communicated with me before, and I love reading about your progress. It gives me so much hope.  I'll be happy when I can be me again. I really hate looking like Beetlejuice

 

 

Hi everyone

 

 

Thank you for starting this thread, it has just validated me..... Thank you Thank you Thank you

I have been in such despair over my disintegrating appearance, I looked at wigs online, phoned a company and went for a consultation this morning.  On the phone the woman was so sympathetic and understanding as I explained my physical symptoms  .... Well when I arrived for the consultation all was quite different.  Not only did the manager and the woman I spoke to not believe me and yes I do have very thin broken hair, sagging muscles and reptile like sagging skin and lifeless eyes.  The woman said I looked fine and they could not help me.  I may be cognitively impaired but I know when I am being treated like a Junkie!!! People dont understand what we are going through.  I have made an appointment with my hairdresser for a deep treatment and a head massage, as thats all I can do at this stage and wear hats!!!

 

 

Again thank you and God bless you

 

 

Peace Love and healing

Towardsthesun

Toward

 

were they maybe just saying that you did look fine and that there was nothing they could help you with because you looked fine?

yeah--i don't know what to do about my hair (which does seem thicker and not standing up straight and vibrating anymore)

but i don't remember how it use to be--or how i use to style it. i just can't remember.

 

Ladygrace, thank you so much for the hope and faith. i can't believe it has changed for you at 8 months out--i am 12 months out and still not liking my appearance and afraid to be seen. i am still so underweight--at 88 lbs i just don't know what to do especially since i watch what i eat due to candida issues and what revv's my brain and what doesn't.

 

i guess just keep on--keeping on and "in window's" i will know what to do. all i know is that having a raw carrot everyday has helped me immensely.

Thanks Pretty, I do look fine to those who didnt know me before I was revaged by this poison.  I am still very drawn and pale.

The two women walked away to the back of the shop and then came back.  That is when the woman said she couldnt help me.  :'(  It was almost like a seen from the movie Pretty Woman except I am 20 years older and look a lot more haggered!!!!

Toward,

 

maybe it's the 'Derealization' part of withdrawal that made it seem worse. i do know how that is when you're already feeling so fragile and delicate and you don't quite know how to fend for yourself or have those strong "defense" type words. maybe it was just those feelings on "unreality" and not quite as bad. but if they did say anything or think anything about you--i will most definitely fly out to where you live and go and beat them up because i had a window and i know how strong i am now!

Hi all,

Yes, I think during my ordeal, I've developed slight frown lines, I didn't really have anything to speak of with wrincles, so I hope they go away once I'm fully out of this!

WD is majour stress,so we can expect many of the symptoms of that.

Weight loss will loosen skin too.

I certainly hope in all our cases Linda is right and we go back to where we were before this evil befell us!!!

Even now, I still get told I look about 28, at 45, that isn't bad!

Fingers crossed it just gets better for all of us!

 

I'm in my late sixties and still expecting to emerge young and youthful when all this is done with me. I will never give in to old age and it's badge of wrinkles and grey hair. Its not me!

 

I'm recovering and as I do so the perception of myself has also improved. I no longer look pale and drawn with dark bags under my eyes. Everyone says how well I look so hopefully they're not lying. I do have a wrinkled neck which I hate and a few of those nasty little lines that have sprouted above my top lip. I'm hoping all this will smooth out. If not I'll look into cosmetic treatment of some sort because I don't want to be left with any reminder of what I've been through.

 

As to hair, it's still a bit of a bird's nest but at least it's not grey yet. It grows long, straggly and thin but I'm hoping time will thicken it out and improve the frizziness. Hair in other parts of the body has

all but disappeared so not a bad thing and I don't particularly want it back. Eyebrows have already started thickening up so hopefully that's a sign of things to come.

 

We will all emerge smooth skinned beauties whatever our age Always think positive. Now back to the treadmill to firm up the flab!

Toward,

 

maybe it's the 'Derealization' part of withdrawal that made it seem worse. i do know how that is when you're already feeling so fragile and delicate and you don't quite know how to fend for yourself or have those strong "defense" type words. maybe it was just those feelings on "unreality" and not quite as bad. but if they did say anything or think anything about you--i will most definitely fly out to where you live and go and beat them up because i had a window and i know how strong i am now!

 

 

Oh I love you Pretty...... thank you..... beautiful caring lady...... I am crying as I read this, I think I was in the "derealization part thing" and they were just rude ......

Moving forward...... What kind of facial would you recommend I have.  I need to start living in the real world more often and love myself a little more.

I think that people who didn't know us before the w/d do not see how bad we look. In my case, I just look like an older, sicker version of myself. It's not like a sprouted a third eye or anything. My family sees my deterioration because they know what I looked like in August 2012, before the w/d. No one ages this quickly in 8 months unless they have a serious problem aka. Benzo withdrawal.

New people don't understand why we are so depressed and panicked over our looks. They think, "what the big deal? She has thinning hair, wrinkled dry sagging skin, and no muscle tone.........so does my grandmother."

Hi all,  I am so glad to come upon this post.  I just turned 50 before I started this w/d journey and was thinking

wow, middle age changes you overnight!  I see an old hag when I look in the mirror now too but it's not so much the deeper wrinkles but the pebbley, coarse texture of my skin and the wierd purplish/red color.  My

hands have also developed hard lizard like skin.  My face and hands also swell and burn.  I'm encouraged after

reading these other posts that I can return to normal someday.  Thank you all.

Beth mentioned losing the hair on her body - what's up with that? I started noticing that maybe a year and a half ago. I dont even have to shave under my arms now! Im 63 - is it just age, or do benzos somehow cause this? Or, anti-depressants??

 

I wish I COULD afford cosmetic work. I "lost" a lot of years being on a benzo and during those years, I was aging (DUH!) . In my mind's eye, Im still that pretty woman with the curley hair, and I dont look like her anymore. Where did she go??

My hair went almost completely straight, turned about 60% grey. I have a pot belly. Yes, I colored my hair and picked too dark a shade, and got it cut short....but I do not look like "myself" anymore. Im not real down about this...just thinking out loud. I remember during the worst days of my withdrawal, I only saw an old hag in the mirror. Now, if I go to the trouble of putting on makeup and picking the right clothing, I look pretty ok...but who has the energy to do all that every day?

 

ive been reading comments on avon (lol) about this cream they sell. it seems it really helps alot of peoples skin. i think its called Solutions moisturizer??

oh this aged me alot!!

Oh man, the lizard skin on my hands is so creepy. It was actually the first (appearance related) symptom I had. Even before the wrinkled, dry skin and muscle loss. I think it was even before I started losing my hair. I remember my shock when I first saw it. I was at work, in a conference room. I actually have a photo of one of my hands prior to w/d. I accidently took it with my phone.  So I know what my hands used to look like, and they didn't look like witches hands. Ever notice that the lists of Benzo withdrawal symptoms never mention anything about the appearance related symtpoms? I think I saw one list that said something about hair loss. No wrinkles, dry sagging skin, muslce loss....

Oh man, the lizard skin on my hands is so creepy. It was actually the first (appearance related) symptom I had. Even before the wrinkled, dry skin and muscle loss. I think it was even before I started losing my hair. I remember my shock when I first saw it. I was at work, in a conference room. I actually have a photo of one of my hands prior to w/d. I accidently took it with my phone.  So I know what my hands used to look like, and they didn't look like witches hands. Ever notice that the lists of Benzo withdrawal symptoms never mention anything about the appearance related symtpoms? I think I saw one list that said something about hair loss. No wrinkles, dry sagging skin, muslce loss....

 

 

 

Hope

I know how you feel , my hands where firts lost all meat or muscle under skin , after my face , neck , boobs , every part of body . Even I was riding bike like crazy  up to hills , all muscles where gone like over night .  Just horrible .  I have pictures before  , due taper  and when quit . Absolutely horrible , scary huge difference .

Face just sagges to my knees . Erika

I think that people who didn't know us before the w/d do not see how bad we look. In my case, I just look like an older, sicker version of myself. It's not like a sprouted a third eye or anything. My family sees my deterioration because they know what I looked like in August 2012, before the w/d. No one ages this quickly in 8 months unless they have a serious problem aka. Benzo withdrawal.

New people don't understand why we are so depressed and panicked over our looks. They think, "what the big deal? She has thinning hair, wrinkled dry sagging skin, and no muscle tone.........so does my grandmother."

 

 

 

 

Yep so true..... 

my tushy is still like flattened pancakes and i still am not really able to get up during the day to go and walk or do anything active. i think my face and skin might be coming back--but then there are moments where it turns all these weird dark orange brown color when i am in a bad wave--and that could literally morph into a young teenager and then back again.

 

it's bizarre--bizarre!

 

i just watched Life of Pi tonight and cried my eyes out. i swear, watching a good movie that stir's your soul like that can kinda take you out of that dreaded DR. sorry, don't wish to get off topic but i just finished watching it and i haven't watched any movies this benzo withdrawal and it feels nice to want to do that again. sure does take your mind off the age and looking older thing. but this aging and looking older thing sure does humble you doesn't it? just a bit/?

Hey does anyone here no if we do go back to normal..... I saw a photo today on my phone, I have less than half the amount of hair now and my face is hanging down near my angles!!!!!

Toward,

 

my hair has totally changed for the better. i just noticed it yesterday. i didn't think it would ever change and it turned into this old lady hair style over night. i 'think' my face is changing for the better but that one i will have to keep you posted. i am a perfectionist.

 

pretty