The Xanax Club, Let Us Know How You Are Feeling Today

Hello, I am new to the Xanax club.  I have been trying to dose off of .25 mg 2x daily with great difficulty. I am only down 25 percent and feeling discouraged.  I am cutting 2.5 percent of .35mg once a month and still having side effects.  Hypothyroidism, low blood platelets, anxiety, depression,muscle spasms,low iron, low B 12.    it feels like it is getting more difficult with each cut, but how could I cut any less?  At this rate it will take years to be free of this drug.

 

I need some guidance..

 

Hello,  I am so sorry you are having such a rough time.  How many times do you dose a day?  Twice?  That is what I get from your post.  If that is what you are doing, you may want to consider dosing 4 times a day so that you are keeping a steady stream of Xanax in your system.  This would help with interdose withdrawal.

That is what I do.  I can not dose less than 4 times a day at this point.  Since the beginning of taking high doses of Xanax , I have always dosed 4 times a day.  Even with tapering, I need to do that so I do not have interdose withdrawal. 

Let me know how you dose and maybe I can give you some guidance or at least tell you what has worked for me.  I know that what works for one person may not work for all but I do know that spreading out your doses has helped alto of people.  If you are only dosing twice a day, it may help you alto to spread out your doses to 4 a day and that could help you with the symptoms you are having.

 

Take care.

hugs

Julia

 

Good idea Julia.

 

Sea salt, you could also do 3 doses a day. That way you have a bit more medication each time. Kind of a balance between an effective dose and interdose withdraw.

 

Keep in mind we want to give you the best suggestions and ideas we have, but your body will tell you what modifications are helpful.

 

My strongest inkling is that you need to microtaper from here. However, I am not a doctor, so please, follow your instincts.

Also, look at Julias taper numbers as she got lower. Very very small cuts. That's micro tapering. Even though my dosage is so high, I just started micro tapering myself. My previous 2 attempts at tapering failed, so going in this direction for my 3ed and hopefully final, taper.

 

This is what I meant when I said don't be rigid. We often have to change things up as we go along.

Hello, I am new to the Xanax club.  I have been trying to dose off of .25 mg 2x daily with great difficulty. I am only down 25 percent and feeling discouraged.  I am cutting 2.5 percent of .35mg once a month and still having side effects.  Hypothyroidism, low blood platelets, anxiety, depression,muscle spasms,low iron, low B 12.    it feels like it is getting more difficult with each cut, but how could I cut any less?  At this rate it will take years to be free of this drug.

 

I need some guidance..

 

Hello,  I am so sorry you are having such a rough time.  How many times do you dose a day?  Twice?  That is what I get from your post.  If that is what you are doing, you may want to consider dosing 4 times a day so that you are keeping a steady stream of Xanax in your system.  This would help with interdose withdrawal.

That is what I do.  I can not dose less than 4 times a day at this point.  Since the beginning of taking high doses of Xanax , I have always dosed 4 times a day.  Even with tapering, I need to do that so I do not have interdose withdrawal. 

Let me know how you dose and maybe I can give you some guidance or at least tell you what has worked for me.  I know that what works for one person may not work for all but I do know that spreading out your doses has helped alto of people.  If you are only dosing twice a day, it may help you alto to spread out your doses to 4 a day and that could help you with the symptoms you are having.

 

Take care.

hugs

Julia

 

Good idea Julia. Thank you baddove, I like you idea of 3 doses as well since Sea salt is so miserable.  That could make Sea Salt feel better faster. 

 

Sea salt, you could also do 3 doses a day. That way you have a bit more medication each time. Kind of a balance between an effective dose and interdose withdraw.

 

Keep in mind we want to give you the best suggestions and ideas we have, but your body will tell you what modifications are helpful.  I agree 100%.  When I first started my taper, I kept looking at how others were tapering and how fast and I quickly found that my body and brain did not like some of what I tried.  I had to find what worked for me. 

 

My strongest inkling is that you need to microtaper from here. However, I am not a doctor, so please, follow your instincts.     I find that micro tapering is what is best for me. Yes it will take me longer to get to 0 but the way I am doing this is making things alot easier for me to make cuts and be able to function and not have many or any side effects. I just made another cut this past Sunday and I am starting to feel it some this time.  I will slow down until my body tells me I am ready to cut again.  It could be a couple weeks or a month or so.  I do listen to my body because I do not want to feel bad and be bed ridden, been there and done that!  It is not a race.  We all want to go fast and get off these pills ASAP but if we go slow, listen to our bodies and make adjustments when we need to, when we get to the end there is more of a chance of healing faster and completely.  I am not a doctor either, all I have is experience with what works for me.

 

Sea Salt, how long have you been taking Xanax?  Something else to think about is like what Baddove said and has done, sometimes people, including myself, may have to go back up to a dose that was working and not giving you horrible symptoms and take time to stabilize.  I did that a few months ago, I had a hard time getting from 1.125 down to 1.0 mg.  I kept beating myself up because it was so hard to go down .125 mg, but then I reminded myself that I have come a long way and this was temporary and I would get down to 1.0 mg when my body was ready.  Now that I am under 1.0 mg, I have made even smaller cuts and have been making them more often but like I said, until this one, I had no issues.  Today could have been a fluke and may not be because of the cut on Sunday because I did not eat like I should have this morning.  I will know tomorrow.  I will adjust as I need to.

 

Please be kind to your self and do what works for you.  We are here for you.

 

Hugs,

Julia

Thank you both so much!

Thanks badove & toln.

 

I'm not sure if I could do all it takes to do Bobs method. Would definitely need hubby to do it.

I having DR & visual distortions with cog fog. But so can't see right in the least. Thinking workers off & on.

 

You guys ever het these symptoms?

 

Tolnbltp, do you know what manufacturer makes your alprazolam.

 

Mine are very hard & seem to shatter in a pill cutter. I've mostly been splitting them in half with fingernails to get .25

For normal doses. I know not scientific. Mine are by greenstone.

 

I'm trying to see if I can get same manufacturer in .25mg.

 

Sorry can't see your dig right now.

How many years have you all been on Xanax?

 

Is Xanax only benzo you've been on.

 

Much thanks

SC

 

Hello, - Yes I have had visual distortions before, its like one eye will get blurry and it will last for a few hours and goes away, fortunately  I have not had that in a while.  The cog fog, I do have sometimes but it is getting better the lower as I go lower in dose. 

The brand I take is greenstone and it is the only brand I can take.  They do make a .25 mg  from greenstone as well and it a white pill. 

 

The pill cutter I have is a generic one and does not have a name on it.  We got it from the drug store.  He takes the .5 mg and puts it in the pill cutter lengthwise and makes a cut and then he said he takes that and breaks it on the lines and that is how he gets 4 pieces of .0625.

 

My vision problems are from birth and not due to the xanax and withdrawal. 

 

I have been on Xanax then Ativan and changed back to xanax daily for 3 years and have taken xanax for over 25 years but only .25 once in a while when I was upset or something.  Maybe 4-5 times a year.  Which is the way it is intended to be taken.  Not high doses for extended lengths of time

 

Will respond more later.

Hugs,

Julia

Thanks do much for taking time to reply. So Very helpful.

To clarify, you're tapering from a .25mg xanax pill made by greenstone, by quartering it?  Hi, sorry, I did not see this before,  you are so welcome.  I am using .5 mg and .25 mg pills right now, quartering them both to  get to the smaller doses.  Right now my 2nd, 3rd, and 4th dose of the day are .1875 which is the following - .0625 from the  quartered .25 mg and .125 mg from the quartered .5 mg. 

 

XX,

SC

 

I am a little confused as to your dose.  I see you take .25 4 times a day, but what is the bedtime dose?

 

Much gratitude, again, Julia.

Very helpful & my brain was actually able to take it in. Not sure it will stay there, but it's in print, now. Thats awesome.  Progress. 

You are making great progress! Bravo!  I am trying so hard.  Thank you .

Maybe when you get down lower than .0625, you could get your pills compounded by pharmacist into capsules. Just an idea.  I will definitely look into that.  I did not know you could do that.

Thank you.

 

What is shaving pills? Is that done with a nail file? A razor?  It is exactly what you said, you can use a nail file or razor to shave off some of the pill.  some people shave them down and use a scale to weigh their pills and dose down like that but I do not do that.

 

I'm, unfortunately taking, both klonopin & alprazolam

 

So my doses are:

Day: every 4 hours, I try for these times or within 30m of them.

6am    .25Xanax

10am .25X

2pm  .25X

6pm  .25X

 

Bed 1MgXanax & 1.5 Klonopin-9:30-10pm  Thanks for explaining that to me.  I understand now.  I am sorry you have to take both.  Are you just tapering the Xanax now? 

 

Take care 

SC

 

Take care and let me know if I can help you in any way.  We will get through this.  It is hard but we can do it.

Hugs,  Julia

Hi Julia,

Thanks for the nice replies.

 

I do not know how to do the insert sentences into text thing, as you have done, so please forgive if I miss anything.

 

Basically saying, thank you, & your welcome.

 

Yes, I've not done it, but have read others that did dry tapers & had their Pill's, in the same generic manufacturer compounded by compounding pharmacist & placed into capsules. Just my opinion, but, I think it would be best for when one gets where need smaller cuts than they can get & or at the end of taper , if possible, so as to save money. The one issue with this is, lack of flexibility, possibly, as once they're made, you know, that's the cut your on, unless you have a replacement plan. Oh & doc needs to be willing to write it that way for you. Hopefully you can find help in the, maybe micro taper section from others experienced with this, when if you decide to do it.

 

Don't want to be a pest...

To double clarify on the  rubber inside V shaped pill cutter. Does yours have & small space at the bottom of the V where the pill must be wedged in to hold it steady? Like the tip of the V has a gap? As apposed to just laying the pill on top of the bottom of the V? Hope that makes sense?

Do you know how your husband knows he's got it vertical & evenly split in half lengthwise?

 

Glad you seem to be doing well.

 

I'm not tapering right now. I'm on a hold & trying to plan how I should taper with these 2 meds. I presume I'd cut the Xanax first, but my case is complicated as I have some bad DErealization & visual distortion sxs & im waiting for others in the tapering section to chime in & help me plan what to do. Also trying to wean caffeine water right now & it's rough on me.

 

Be well

SC

Except for being sore from loading another trailer full of furniture as I transition to a second home south of the Mason Dixon line, I'm feeling  fine. Tomorrow I plan to purchase some large plastic tote bins and then pack and load them with plenty of kitchenware. I'll then winterize this house and follow the sun to warmer climes and pursue new adventures with my children, grandchildren and some of the many new and friendly neighbors I've been meeting at my second home. This plan is coming together nicely. Sincere Best Wishes to All!  

FI Addendum, I see in your post you got down to .25 mg and then updosed to 1 mg?  May I ask why after getting so low and why such a big increase?

FI Addendum, I see in your post you got down to .25 mg and then updosed to 1 mg?  May I ask why after getting so low and why such a big increase?

 

Consultations with my physician and other experienced & knowledgeable physicians, surgeons and anesthesiologists, my previous experiences with benzodiazepines and my independent research of science based studies guide my actions in regard to my benzodiazepine treatment plan. Sincere Best Wishes!  

 

 

I accidentally cold turkey xanax January 2020 within two weeks of maybe 30 or so pills. Not sure how many. I didn't know it can cause brain injury but it did. It was the most horrific experience of my life. Fast forward now 9 months out I've seen and felt my brain heal. I am still dealing with tingling vibration different parts of my brain. Just can't wait til I don't have to think about symptoms anymore. Most people heal from this injury 18 to 24 months out from what I read. I know everyone heal at different rates. I am hoping to be healed within another year.

Hi all,

Just wanted to check in and say hi and see how everyone is doing.  Please post and let us know how you are.  I am cutting today so I am a little anxious but I will be ok.  My last cut did not go well at all because I accidentally double cut.... what a nightmare.  It took weeks to start to feel better.  I will not make that mistake again.  Cog fog had something to do with that, at least I think so.  I am so careful when I do my pill box for the week but something happened that day when I did my box that I do not want to happen again.

 

Take care all,

Hugs,

Julia

Thanks badove & toln.

 

I'm not sure if I could do all it takes to do Bobs method. Would definitely need hubby to do it.

I having DR & visual distortions with cog fog. But so can't see right in the least. Thinking workers off & on.

 

You guys ever het these symptoms?

 

Tolnbltp, do you know what manufacturer makes your alprazolam.

 

Mine are very hard & seem to shatter in a pill cutter. I've mostly been splitting them in half with fingernails to get .25

For normal doses. I know not scientific. Mine are by greenstone.

 

I'm trying to see if I can get same manufacturer in .25mg.

 

Sorry can't see your dig right now.

How many years have you all been on Xanax?

 

Is Xanax only benzo you've been on.

 

Much thanks

SC

 

Hello, - Yes I have had visual distortions before, its like one eye will get blurry and it will last for a few hours and goes away, fortunately  I have not had that in a while.  The cog fog, I do have sometimes but it is getting better the lower as I go lower in dose. 

The brand I take is greenstone and it is the only brand I can take.  They do make a .25 mg  from greenstone as well and it a white pill. 

 

The pill cutter I have is a generic one and does not have a name on it.  We got it from the drug store.  He takes the .5 mg and puts it in the pill cutter lengthwise and makes a cut and then he said he takes that and breaks it on the lines and that is how he gets 4 pieces of .0625.

 

My vision problems are from birth and not due to the xanax and withdrawal. 

 

I have been on Xanax then Ativan and changed back to xanax daily for 3 years and have taken xanax for over 25 years but only .25 once in a while when I was upset or something.  Maybe 4-5 times a year.  Which is the way it is intended to be taken.  Not high doses for extended lengths of time

 

Will respond more later.

Hugs,

Julia

Thanks do much for taking time to reply. So Very helpful.

To clarify, you're tapering from a .25mg xanax pill made by greenstone, by quartering it?  Hi, sorry, I did not see this before,  you are so welcome.  I am using .5 mg and .25 mg pills right now, quartering them both to  get to the smaller doses.  Right now my 2nd, 3rd, and 4th dose of the day are .1875 which is the following - .0625 from the  quartered .25 mg and .125 mg from the quartered .5 mg. 

 

XX,

SC

 

I am a little confused as to your dose.  I see you take .25 4 times a day, but what is the bedtime dose?

 

Much gratitude, again, Julia.

Very helpful & my brain was actually able to take it in. Not sure it will stay there, but it's in print, now. Thats awesome.  Progress. 

You are making great progress! Bravo!  I am trying so hard.  Thank you .

Maybe when you get down lower than .0625, you could get your pills compounded by pharmacist into capsules. Just an idea.  I will definitely look into that.  I did not know you could do that.

Thank you.

 

What is shaving pills? Is that done with a nail file? A razor?  It is exactly what you said, you can use a nail file or razor to shave off some of the pill.  some people shave them down and use a scale to weigh their pills and dose down like that but I do not do that.

 

I'm, unfortunately taking, both klonopin & alprazolam

 

So my doses are:

Day: every 4 hours, I try for these times or within 30m of them.

6am    .25Xanax

10am .25X

2pm  .25X

6pm  .25X

 

Bed 1MgXanax & 1.5 Klonopin-9:30-10pm  Thanks for explaining that to me.  I understand now.  I am sorry you have to take both.  Are you just tapering the Xanax now? 

 

Take care 

SC

 

Take care and let me know if I can help you in any way.  We will get through this.  It is hard but we can do it.

Hugs,  Julia

Hi Julia,

Thanks for the nice replies.

 

I do not know how to do the insert sentences into text thing, as you have done, so please forgive if I miss anything.

 

Basically saying, thank you, & your welcome.

 

Yes, I've not done it, but have read others that did dry tapers & had their Pill's, in the same generic manufacturer compounded by compounding pharmacist & placed into capsules. Just my opinion, but, I think it would be best for when one gets where need smaller cuts than they can get & or at the end of taper , if possible, so as to save money. The one issue with this is, lack of flexibility, possibly, as once they're made, you know, that's the cut your on, unless you have a replacement plan. Oh & doc needs to be willing to write it that way for you. Hopefully you can find help in the, maybe micro taper section from others experienced with this, when if you decide to do it.

 

Don't want to be a pest...

To double clarify on the  rubber inside V shaped pill cutter. Does yours have & small space at the bottom of the V where the pill must be wedged in to hold it steady? Like the tip of the V has a gap? As apposed to just laying the pill on top of the bottom of the V? Hope that makes sense?

Do you know how your husband knows he's got it vertical & evenly split in half lengthwise?

 

Glad you seem to be doing well.

 

I'm not tapering right now. I'm on a hold & trying to plan how I should taper with these 2 meds. I presume I'd cut the Xanax first, but my case is complicated as I have some bad DErealization & visual distortion sxs & im waiting for others in the tapering section to chime in & help me plan what to do. Also trying to wean caffeine water right now & it's rough on me.

 

Be well

SC

 

Hello, Just wanted to check in and see how you are doing?  Better I hope.

 

Hugs,

Julia

following

Other than feeling & knowing that I'm physiologically dependent upon Xanax, I'm feeling great. I've successfully moved into my 2nd home which is only a few minutes drive from my children and grandchildren. Yesterday my daughter and I found and ordered a sectional sofa for my living room that fits perfectly in front of my fireplace & TV and is large enough to comfortably seat most of my family & me. The adjoining kitchen is large enough to accommodate those that choose to sit there, stroll around the house or walk around the grounds or whatever they choose to do. We had the greatest time shopping and joking with the sales people at the furniture store. I seem to have a way to make even the grumpiest of people cheer up when I stand in front of them and tickle their psychological funny bone that they forgot they have or try to hide. After shopping, our families met up and prepped holiday related goodies, some of which I shared with the family doggie pets that they have. Then we all met up with another family within our 'pandemic related social bubble' and watched football & chowed down on great food & colorful libations. Some of us took naps and others played games or watched football games on TV. Earlier in the day, one of my daughters and her husband, who are front line medical personnel, received the first of the two doses of the new Pfizer CoVid vaccinations that they decided to receive based upon their current assessment of risks vs. benefits. So far, they are both feeling well and have experienced no adverse side effects. Tonight, I have prepared the dose of Xanax which I know I will need around 1 A.M. and I am getting ready to watch some TV before going to bed.

 

I want to send my best wishes to all of you. I know and I have experienced the suffering of withdrawal and cessation. I empathize with all who are currently suffering and hope we feel better or at least not worse as time marches on for all of us. Good night all.    

Other than feeling & knowing that I'm physiologically dependent upon Xanax, I'm feeling great. I've successfully moved into my 2nd home which is only a few minutes drive from my children and grandchildren. Yesterday my daughter and I found and ordered a sectional sofa for my living room that fits perfectly in front of my fireplace & TV and is large enough to comfortably seat most of my family & me. The adjoining kitchen is large enough to accommodate those that choose to sit there, stroll around the house or walk around the grounds or whatever they choose to do. We had the greatest time shopping and joking with the sales people at the furniture store. I seem to have a way to make even the grumpiest of people cheer up when I stand in front of them and tickle their psychological funny bone that they forgot they have or try to hide. After shopping, our families met up and prepped holiday related goodies, some of which I shared with the family doggie pets that they have. Then we all met up with another family within our 'pandemic related social bubble' and watched football & chowed down on great food & colorful libations. Some of us took naps and others played games or watched football games on TV. Earlier in the day, one of my daughters and her husband, who are front line medical personnel, received the first of the two doses of the new Pfizer CoVid vaccinations that they decided to receive based upon their current assessment of risks vs. benefits. So far, they are both feeling well and have experienced no adverse side effects. Tonight, I have prepared the dose of Xanax which I know I will need around 1 A.M. and I am getting ready to watch some TV before going to bed.

 

I want to send my best wishes to all of you. I know and I have experienced the suffering of withdrawal and cessation. I empathize with all who are currently suffering and hope we feel better or at least not worse as time marches on for all of us. Good night all.  

 

Hi Fi - I am so happy for you.  Sounds like you are doing well.  It is great to be able to be with your family and enjoy your new home. 

Thank your daughter and husband for all they are doing for people.  God Bless Them!

 

Take care and I am praying for all of us.  I hope you are doing well on your dose. 

 

Love and hugs,

Julia

I just want to provide a brief update on my daughter's & son-in-law's Pfizer CoVid vaccinations. I just checked on them, it's been a little over 48 hours post vaccination. My daughter hasn't noticed any adverse side effects; my son-in-law said he may have a little stuffy nose but that may be unrelated to the vaccine. Best Wishes!

FI, thanks for the update!!

Fi, yes, thanks for letting us know.  That is great to know.

 

 

I was only on Xanax for 5 months. 1mg.

I will be off two years next month.

I have had some windows where I am doing better and overall more functional but otherwise, I'm still really struggling. I feel so psychotic at times and just out of my mind. I keep trying to move forward but it is getting so discouraging the further out this goes. Hope everyone else is hanging in there!

I just want to provide a brief update on my daughter's & son-in-law's Pfizer CoVid vaccinations. I just checked on them, it's been a little over 48 hours post vaccination. My daughter hasn't noticed any adverse side effects; my son-in-law said he may have a little stuffy nose but that may be unrelated to the vaccine. Best Wishes!

 

We have started a unified thread for Covid and the Vaccine. Could you please post in this forum in regards to how the experience affects them?

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=249510.0

 

Thanks much

Following

I was only on Xanax for 5 months. 1mg.

I will be off two years next month.

I have had some windows where I am doing better and overall more functional but otherwise, I'm still really struggling. I feel so psychotic at times and just out of my mind. I keep trying to move forward but it is getting so discouraging the further out this goes. Hope everyone else is hanging in there!

Warrior24 - I am so sorry.  I just saw this.  I understand the cold turkey as that is what happened to me and I was quite ill for several months and then was put back on xanax and it took a year to stabilize.  I did not know what was happening to me until I found BB January 2019.  Then I started tapering.

Keep hanging in there, sometimes distraction really helps me. I sometimes just get on here and read others stories and that helps. 

I wish I could help you.  There is a thread for people who have long term withdrawal but I am not sure where it is.  I will look for it.

Take care and keep fighting.  One day you will get there.

Hugs,

Julia

Thank you Julia

Thank you Julia

Hi you are welcome.  I also wanted to say that I know it is hard and that at the stage you are at, I know it will get better.  It takes time, unfortunately it takes more time than we would like.  I can not wait until this drug is out of my life and I can heal and live a normal life, whatever that is at this point.

Take care and hang in there.

Julia

Hi everyone, I hope you are all having a good or better day.  I am hanging in there. 

 

Yesterday my nephew killed himself and I am heartbroken.  He was only 30 years old.  He got involved with hard drugs and for the last month that is all he did.  He did some things that are horrible and I will not get into that.  Regardless of what he did, and I hate that he did some things that can never be undone, he was my nephew and I have loved him with all my heart and I wish he was still here. 

 

I am grateful for the good times we had in his life and I pray he is now in heaven with God.

 

I am very close to my sister and her husband and this is killing them.  I do not know how I would deal with my child killing themselves.  (I do not have children)  It is bad enough that my father did that and was buried on my 7th birthday which is part of my PTSD.

 

Yesterday when I found out about his death, I had what felt like sharp needles go throughout my body and I almost fainted.  The one thing I am grateful for is that I did not up dose to deal with this. Somehow, with the support of my husband, I was able to get through yesterday and so far today, without making the situation worse by hurting my progress from tapering. 

 

I am surprised that I have been able to just feel my feelings, lots of crying and thinking about the last few years without feeling like I needed to take more medication to get through it and I am so glad about that. 

 

I do not think this has 100% sunk in.  My family lives in another state and because of covid, they are cremating him and doing a memorial service later.

 

I just needed to write this and share what I am going through right now.

 

I hope you all are hanging in there and I keep praying for all of us.

 

Hugs,

Julia

Julia,  I am so sorry for your loss.  It is important to know that if your nephew was abusing drugs        his brain chemistry was altered,I am sure that is what led to some of his adverse behavior.  Please try to remember who he was prior to this.

 

You have done so well not to have updosed during these difficult times.  I know the feeling of needles you describe when feeling stressed, please know you have support here.  My heart is broken for you and your family.

 

Hugs..