Driving in the Left Lane- pianogirl's Story of Healing and Hope for all of You!

 

 

Oh my gosh Gard!!! This looks delicious and if I could really eat it, I would.....eat.....the .....whole ......cake!!

 

Many thanks! 

 

Me, too! That's why I only have cyber-cakes.

Congrats PG.  What a blessing you are to me and so many others for your tireless support.  The very best to you and the Mister.

Congrats PG.  What a blessing you are to me and so many others for your tireless support.  The very best to you and the Mister.

 

Thanks dear friend!  I'm looking forward to reading your success story, it will happen!!!! 

pianogirl,

 

I just read your success story and although it's been several years since your posted it i want to thank you for sharing your encouraging story with everyone here. 

 

I want to take this opportunity to remark on how impressed and comforted I've been by the many posts I've seen of yours since I joined BB a couple of months ago - I've been so struck by the integrity you demonstrate - you are a voice of empathy for everyone's suffering but  you also take a firm stand against bullying and personal attacks when they arise.  It seems to me you must have a strong & tireless sense of cause in giving of yourself to this forum long after your own healing.  It is so generous of you.  I have so appreciated your voice here.

 

I'm also happy to bump your success story so others who may not have seen it can benefit.

 

With gratitude for your kindness,

BD

pianogirl,

 

I just read your success story and although it's been several years since your posted it i want to thank you for sharing your encouraging story with everyone here. 

 

I want to take this opportunity to remark on how impressed and comforted I've been by the many posts I've seen of yours since I joined BB a couple of months ago - I've been so struck by the integrity you demonstrate - you are a voice of empathy for everyone's suffering but  you also take a firm stand against bullying and personal attacks when they arise.  It seems to me you must have a strong & tireless sense of cause in giving of yourself to this forum long after your own healing.  It is so generous of you.  I have so appreciated your voice here.

 

I'm also happy to bump your success story so others who may not have seen it can benefit.

 

With gratitude for your kindness,

BD

 

Brighterday!!!

 

You made my day a lot brighter after reading the kind words you posted. I'm honored and humbled by your complements.

 

I am however, just one of many who want to give back to a community that helped us so much while going through a life changing, challenging process.

 

Thank you so much and I wish you all the best in your recovery leading to a happy healthy benzo free life!

 

PG 

To all my friends here, old friends and new and to those who might happen upon this thread that are still going through the difficulties of withdrawal, I would simply urge you to keep believing in your healing.

 

At this point, withdrawal seems like another lifetime.  It certainly consumed me and without the forum I would have been lost and lacking validation from those who really understand how difficult this process can be.  I'll never forget what I endured but it is not on my personal radar any more.  It doesn't define me or affect me in any of my day to day activities. Life is simply "life" with the usual ups and downs that my healthy cns can tolerate with no difficulties.

 

You can be where I am as well, just give your bodies and minds the time to recover.  Little by little, all the parts of the cns that were affected by either the drugs or withdrawal will find that balance, that stability, that equilibrium. 

 

I so understand how difficult holidays can be while in the throes of withdrawal. I basted turkeys with tremors, I shopped with dizzy boaty symptoms and had some pretty significant nerve pain while trying to find some joy in the seasons.  It all went away and each subsequent holiday found me in a better place.

 

I wish with all my heart that no one would have to go through withdrawal, but I also know that you are strong warriors who will see the light at the end of the tunnel and find healing ahead.  Peace and serenity to everyone during this holiday season. Love and light to all of you, like the sparkling lights on the trees or the stars up above.

 

PG  :smitten:

Pianogirl,

Congrats on your recovery! Im 13 months off and still experiencing lightheadedness and slight dizziness. From your experience did your boaty lightheadedness gradually fade away. This seems to be my most persistent symptom I am left with. Im scared it is not going to leave. Can I expect to see improvements in this area throughout my second year. Again, congratulations on your recovery. It seems that you had pretty severe dizziness and recovered. This gives me hope!

Thank you!

Fp

To all my friends here, old friends and new and to those who might happen upon this thread that are still going through the difficulties of withdrawal, I would simply urge you to keep believing in your healing.

 

At this point, withdrawal seems like another lifetime.  It certainly consumed me and without the forum I would have been lost and lacking validation from those who really understand how difficult this process can be.  I'll never forget what I endured but it is not on my personal radar any more.  It doesn't define me or affect me in any of my day to day activities. Life is simply "life" with the usual ups and downs that my healthy cns can tolerate with no difficulties.

 

You can be where I am as well, just give your bodies and minds the time to recover.  Little by little, all the parts of the cns that were affected by either the drugs or withdrawal will find that balance, that stability, that equilibrium. 

 

I so understand how difficult holidays can be while in the throes of withdrawal. I basted turkeys with tremors, I shopped with dizzy boaty symptoms and had some pretty significant nerve pain while trying to find some joy in the seasons.  It all went away and each subsequent holiday found me in a better place.

 

I wish with all my heart that no one would have to go through withdrawal, but I also know that you are strong warriors who will see the light at the end of the tunnel and find healing ahead.  Peace and serenity to everyone during this holiday season. Love and light to all of you, like the sparkling lights on the trees or the stars up above.

 

PG  :smitten:

Pianogirl,

Congrats on your recovery! Im 13 months off and still experiencing lightheadedness and slight dizziness. From your experience did your boaty lightheadedness gradually fade away. This seems to be my most persistent symptom I am left with. Im scared it is not going to leave. Can I expect to see improvements in this area throughout my second year. Again, congratulations on your recovery. It seems that you had pretty severe dizziness and recovered. This gives me hope!

Thank you!

Fp

 

Hello Fp,

 

The dizzy boaty feeling came as a real surprise to me. It didn't show up until I was about 4 months off, suddenly, I remember the day even now because it was my birthday. Some gift, right?  It did last for a while, sometimes pretty significant in intensity, where I had to hold on the to counter at the check out stand at the grocery store.  This symptom eased up slowly, it actually took months to completely disappear. But it did disappear.  Benzos have a strong affect on the vestibular system, as with things withdrawal related, recovery can take some time.

 

I did experience a lot of good healing the 2nd year.  I was fully functional but did have waves on occasion.  I think it was simply a reminder that more healing was needed.  The good thing is that I did have some very good days and weeks.  I also had a strong wave right before my full recovery, with a lot of physical symptoms. Once it abated, it was like a curtain opened to a new world of wellness. 

 

I personally believe that hope is important in recovery and that it's important to believe in your healing.  When we look at our prebenzo withdrawal selves and know that these symptoms were not a part of our lives, we also can conclude that they will go away.  Be patient is difficult but necessary while in this process. For me, it was well worth the wait.

 

PG 

 

 

Happy Holidays to everyone!

 

In what I now consider the distant past, I had some 'memorable' holiday celebrations while on benzos and in withdrawal. It's normal to us to wonder if what we feel is the 'new normal'. I did as well, but underneath the doubt was a belief in the ability of my nervous system to heal, to recover. 

 

I could look back in my journals and revisit those past holidays, but what is the purpose in doing that?  All the symptoms I had, the difficulties in getting through the day, the visits from the usual withdrawal 'culprits', all went away, completely and totally.

 

As we close out this year, I wish good things for everyone here.  Whether you are still in the tapering process or in the recovery phase, I send peace and joy to you as well as an affirmation that not every holiday will be what it is now.  Keep believing in your healing!!! I'm no stronger than anyone of you warriors here, working towards a better, healthier future.  I'm proud of all of you, all of us!

 

 

PG 

 

 

Pianogirl,

 

Thank u! 

 

 

Thank you for such beautiful prose, your soul really shines through in your writing.

Thank you for such beautiful prose, your soul really shines through in your writing.

 

Those are such kind words, kanoba, thanks!

 

I just want for others to find the hope that I found reading Success Stories of those who came before me. They were my lifeline for a long tim.

 

Bumping this, perhaps it will help some of our members through this challenging process.

@[pi...]I love this story. How is life many years since all of this?

18 hours ago, [[k...] said:

@[pi...]I love this story. How is life many years since all of this?

Hello @[kl...],

Life is good.  I'm 72, so now it's just a matter of dealing with the aging process. Additionally, I've had a very bad shoulder that predated benzos or withdrawal. I do live life to the fullest, enjoy my granddaughter, and still teach piano.  I have at least some good genes because when I had my shingles vaccine the pharmacist said she couldn't believe I was 72, that I looked so much younger. Of course I offered her lunch. LOL!!! 

 

 

@[pi...] I just read your story. Thank you so much for your active support on bb. I have a question. What is cross tolerance of steroids with benzo?

I was prescribed benzo and steroids at same time 5 years ago and had immediate problems 

Hello @[Sw...].This question is better asked on the Withdrawal and Recovery support forum. Would you mind starting a thread there? I’ll be sure to reply and you’ll get responses from others also. Thanks!

 

@[pi...] hi pianogirl iam 4 months totally clean after 50 days of use and iam now fully functional with tiny waves i get sometimes when i shower nothing major. I know that i should be grateful and iam that i survived this but right now i dont feel like myself at all  will i be 100% exactly how i was before all this? Even my face kynda changed  are u feeling exactly like u were before the withdrawal ?