Author Topic: My Floxed and Benzo story...A happy ending for Jittery!  (Read 8848 times)

[Buddie]

My Floxed and Benzo story...A happy ending for Jittery!
« on: July 15, 2012, 03:37:01 pm »
Dear Buddies,

First, I want to apologize to those of you who have wondered where I have been...I had to take a break for awhile from the forums. There were so many of you that were a wonderful support to me and you have been in my thoughts and prayers while I was away. I wanted to come back and offer hope to those who are still struggling...there really is so much HOPE to hang on to!

In March of 2011, two months after my daughter was born, I was prescribed a flouroquinolone antibiotic call Cipro. I didn't know that these antibiotics can cause severe adverse reactions that only get worse after you stop taking it and may last for years. In some cases, people can be permanently disabled. I had a very severe central nervous system reaction. These antibiotics attach and block GABA-A from the receptor. What I experienced was what I can only imagine the worst benzo withdrawal symptoms imaginable would be like. These antibiotics are not just dangerous to people on benzos--they can cause this benzo withdrawal reaction to people who have never ever touched a benzo before, like me!   Please do not ever take one of these antibiotics if you can help it.

Of course I had no idea what had befallen me, as my worst symptoms appeared a month after I had stopped the antibiotic. I had the worst insomnia a person could imagine. I was unable to sleep for days at a time. When I finally fell asleep, it was only for a few broken hours. The anxiety was so high I could barely function, and I had very severe peripheral neuropathy. I entered into a "5th dimension" where I could just barely function. All the while I had a two month old baby to take care of.

I sought out numerous doctors with no answers. I was finally pushed toward psychiatry, as I believed maybe I had a post-partum issue. I saw a very uncompassionate doctor who started me on my benzo journey. He started me on xanax XR. Within a few weeks I got much, much worse. I was then given ativan. That didn't work either. I learned about benzos through this site and decided I wanted off. I tried to quit cold turkey and immediately experienced symptoms even worse than what I was already going through. I felt like someone was burning me all over with matches! I knew that my body had already become dependent in just a few months. I saw a new doctor who switched me to Klonopin and had me taper off in three weeks. Bad idea!

For many many months I was unable to sleep more than a few hours a night (on a good night!) I had terrible anxiety, myoclonus, muscle twitching, numbness, tingling, and buzzing sensations, heart arrythmia, shaking, sweating, tempurature issues, thyroid and sugar issues, and many other awful things. I have NO IDEA if all of these things were from benzo withdrawal or from quinolone toxicity. The symptoms are virtually identical. I think most of them were from the toxicity, but no doubt benzo withdrawal made everything so much worse.

Sleep was by far my biggest issue. I was so worn down. Insomnia consumed my life. I was miserable and in despair. I started seeing a sleep psychologist and started sleep restriction therapy. It worked wonders for me! I started sleeping 6, 7, even 8 hours a night! I was still sleeping in the guest room, but it was sleep! I learned how insomnia can start out biological and then morph into a psychological problem that causes it to continue.

In May of this year, I had a huge change. This next part may not sit well with everyone, and I sure hope it doesn't offend anyone--please, that is not my intention!

I realized that I was being a really negative person. I was obsessing about my condition, being on the forums 24/7, talking about my condition all the time, and being utterly miserable. I decided one day that I was no longer going to let my symptoms consume me. i was going to try to live my life DESPITE what was happening to me. I started exercising, I started praying again, eating healthier, and I discontinued my memberships to the quinolone forum and took a break from benzo buddies for awhile. I started making a real effort to be positive in ALL my thoughts, not just about my symptoms. I literally did a 180. Many of my symptoms virtually disappeared. The anxiety is almost gone! Sleep isn't perfect but it's so much better than it was. Insomnia doesn't scare me like it used to anymore. And the fear of not sleeping, or even the thought of it's possibility--will keep you from not sleeping! It's such hard cycle to live with, but it can be broken.

I still have a little peripheral neuropathy but I am confident it will eventually go away. I feel really good during the day now! I thought my situation was hopeless, but it turns out there was a lot of hope for me.

I want to thank Colin and the benzo buddy crew for this forum. Even though I had to take a break for awhile there was a time when this site was invaluable to me! I want to thank all the buddies who were there for me: Sunny71, Melo, [...], popcornlady, Vertigo, Pamster, [...], perseverance, sassy, recoveringfrombenzos, [...], schatje, bybymatrix, [...], hollyms, and I know there are others and I'm sorry to forget you.

There were some books that really helped me during this journey: The Effortless sleep method (this book is the BIBLE for insomnia!), The power of positive thinking, and the law of attraction. I used to think your thoughts couldn't make any difference in your health... but they can! They may not fix all of your physical problems but they can cause your brain to make important changes. At the very least, it can help you deal with your symptoms better.

All I know is that I'm so much better than I was--and I was REALLY REALLY bad. My GABA was hit very hard in two ways...and I know it can heal! I can't say enough about exercise and positive thinking---not just thinking but believing.

Please don't ever give up. No matter how bad your situation is, and I know there are those of you that had it worse--just don't give up. I am so sorry each of you are suffering so much. Those memories are still very fresh for me. I haven't forgotten any of you. I will continue to pray for your healing!

All the best,
Jittery
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: My Floxed and Benzo story...A happy ending for Jittery!
« Reply #1 on: July 15, 2012, 03:55:13 pm »
Jittery Amazing!

I was wondering how you were. This is wonderful .I pray as more time passes you will only see even more Improvements.

Way to go Girl... Excellent

~[...]
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: My Floxed and Benzo story...A happy ending for Jittery!
« Reply #2 on: July 15, 2012, 04:04:00 pm »
Jittery-I am so happy that you have improved so much!! Thank you for sharing your story :)

[...]
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: My Floxed and Benzo story...A happy ending for Jittery!
« Reply #3 on: July 15, 2012, 04:07:08 pm »


I followed your story here at BB and I am so happy for you that you have healed!! Wishing you all good things in life:)

LOVE, :smitten:
[...]
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: My Floxed and Benzo story...A happy ending for Jittery!
« Reply #4 on: July 15, 2012, 04:49:04 pm »
I'm sorry I forgot to thank you [...]!!!! You were an amazing support during my time here!!! Thank u!!
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: My Floxed and Benzo story...A happy ending for Jittery!
« Reply #5 on: July 17, 2012, 09:48:43 pm »
I am so, so happy for you AND your family.  Live your life to the fullest.

[...]  xo  :smitten:
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: My Floxed and Benzo story...A happy ending for Jittery!
« Reply #6 on: July 18, 2012, 02:23:36 am »
Oh, Jittery!!!!!!!!!!!!  A friend just alerted me to your post, and I am so glad to hear this!  This is wonderful, wonderful news!  Hope we still here from you now and then, but glad to hear you are back to living life again.  It makes me so happy I could cry!!

Many hugs and well wishes,
Love, Pommy
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: My Floxed and Benzo story...A happy ending for Jittery!
« Reply #7 on: July 18, 2012, 02:30:46 am »
I'm sorry I forgot to thank you [...]!!!! You were an amazing support during my time here!!! Thank u!!
Aww jittery

You never have to thank me..All I did was try and help you thru your tuff time. I so hope you are enjoying your little baby now .I know that was all you wanted more then anything.Ill never forget.

I hope your Entire family is becoming Whole now! I will never forget how sweet you were and how much you suffered..

Best of wishes to you

:)~[...]
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: My Floxed and Benzo story...A happy ending for Jittery!
« Reply #8 on: July 18, 2012, 05:40:03 am »
Congrats Jittery, that is such an amazing success story. Wish you the absolute best with the rest of your benzo free life. I really liked what you said about the mental aspect and the power of positive thinking.YOU ARE FREE. YAY!!!! Whoaaah!!!!

PS - I'm sure everyone will be wanting your screen name now as it is perfect for so many!!  LOL  =)
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: My Floxed and Benzo story...A happy ending for Jittery!
« Reply #9 on: July 18, 2012, 03:37:07 pm »
Congratulations Jittery :)  And thank you for the advice about not focusing on the problem.  I am starting to believe that.

There is a scripture, "Be transformed by the renewing of your mind."  Yes the mind is powerful :)

Love to you,
[...]
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.