Get your youth and beauty back even during withdrawl!

*jawdrop*

Excuse me, but WTH is this??

 

I will assume that this post was (in some way unfathomable to me) intended to be helpful. But uh, no, not really.

 

It's an alert-the-media event if I manage two showers a week. My hair is falling out. There are archaeological digs under my eyes. My skin looks terrible. My benzo belly won't fit into my clothes. I'm hanging on to life by a thread. I'm 52 and in the midst of a horrific withdrawal; being exhorted to engage in beauty discipline and attend to "getting my youth back" is NOT helpful.

 

Really? Large = "horrid"?

 

I'm sorry but this just blows my mind.

Sparrow

*jawdrop*

Excuse me, but WTH is this??

 

I will assume that this post was (in some way unfathomable to me) intended to be helpful. But uh, no, not really.

 

It's an alert-the-media event if I manage two showers a week. My hair is falling out. There are archaeological digs under my eyes. My skin looks terrible. My benzo belly won't fit into my clothes. I'm hanging on to life by a thread. I'm 52 and in the midst of a horrific withdrawal; being exhorted to engage in beauty discipline and attend to "getting my youth back" is NOT helpful.

 

Really? Large = "horrid"?

 

I'm sorry but this just blows my mind.

Sparrow

Skyy, your "meow" is unwarranted. Using a tooth brush to wash your face isn't a good idea. Plain and simple.

 

I'm, personally am offended by the implication you've made with your "meow". Woman should be able to express their disapproval without being considered "catty".

You said that much better and kinder than I was able to ergo my "oh brother".  I agree with you entirely.

Sky,

 

Again, if you don't understand why this is upsetting to others, then no amount of explanation will make any difference.    For myself, I'm just trying to get through the day with the least amount of unnecessary distress as possible so if this is the most important battle you have to fight, then have at it. I'm done.

Oh I find this thing so sad.  This woman has issued an apology because of this she is in terrible state she may look well emotionally but inside is having a very difficult time.  I know the comments she made when a lot of us feel like crap could be taken the wrong way but its all relative to how we are feeling.  She really wants to make friends and now with this she has been driven away.

 

I guess another way of dealing with these kind of things when we see a post that we dont feel good about we just dont post thats what I do and it works for me otherwise it really does end up like this.  I feel for each and everyone of us at this point in time but turning on each other is so not a good thing for any of our emotional states Im sure we would all agree noone needs the negativity.

 

all the best

 

Lizzy

Personally, I was quite inspired by the original post. I am very interested in how to get the bags from under my eyes and am going to try the cold milk and the fish oil tips. Bit scared of the electric toothbrush idea but might give it a blast.

 

Actually I think that how you look affects how you feel dramatically. There's nothing worse than feeling a bit OK and then looking into the mirror and seeing this sad, old face. I was sitting having coffee after an aqua aerobics class (pre withdrawal days), feeling a bit tired but pleased I had done it. A complete stranger came and asked me if I was OK. Bloody hell! I was until then. I must have looked so pale and crap with no make-up on!

 

Even when feeling really bad I think some of us still want to look decent. I can remember  the labour before having my 9lb 9 1/2 oz baby girl. I had been struggling away all day after an induction. I was in  pain and exhausted. And guess what happened during a push - yes, the worst! The nurse whisked it away. However, even in my pained and worried state (with the baby's heartbeat slowing and a foetal monitor in place) I felt so embarrassed that my male obstetrician, who had delivered my three boys previously, was in the room when that happened. You would think you were beyond caring but there is something deep inside that struggles to come out. It's our dignity.

 

I absolutely hate feeling unwashed or having hair that doesn't smell clean. I will drag myself out of bed to do washing because I would never wear dirty clothes. I put on make-up when I am in the grip of intense anxiety. Sometimes I have to stop because the tears won't allow the eyeliner to stick. (I only wear make-up to go out.) I am not judging anyone else - just saying what keeps me sane.

 

My house is a disgrace and I'm sure some people would hate that and push themselves to clean up.

 

I am grateful for any tips to improve my appearance. I am far too overweight and I hate it. If someone can inspire me to try harder, I am happy to read it.

 

I only came here because I saw Lizzy had posted. I haven't seen the apology by this girl but I hope she is not upset as I don't think she was being critical of anyone else - just giving some advice. Is that so much different from the drug or taper advice, also given in the hope of helping?

 

Anyway, just saying.....

 

Xana

 

Personally, I was quite inspired by the original post. I am very interested in how to get the bags from under my eyes and am going to try the cold milk and the fish oil tips. Bit scared of the electric toothbrush idea but might give it a blast.

 

Actually I think that how you look affects how you feel dramatically. There's nothing worse than feeling a bit OK and then looking into the mirror and seeing this sad, old face. I was sitting having coffee after an aqua aerobics class (pre withdrawal days), feeling a bit tired but pleased I had done it. A complete stranger came and asked me if I was OK. Bloody hell! I was until then. I must have looked so pale and crap with no make-up on!

 

Even when feeling really bad I think some of us still want to look decent. I can remember  the labour before having my 9lb 9 1/2 oz baby girl. I had been struggling away all day after an induction. I was in  pain and exhausted. And guess what happened during a push - yes, the worst! The nurse whisked it away. However, even in my pained and worried state (with the baby's heartbeat slowing and a foetal monitor in place) I felt so embarrassed that my male obstetrician, who had delivered my three boys previously, was in the room when that happened. You would think you were beyond caring but there is something deep inside that struggles to come out. It's our dignity.

 

I absolutely hate feeling unwashed or having hair that doesn't smell clean. I will drag myself out of bed to do washing because I would never wear dirty clothes. I put on make-up when I am in the grip of intense anxiety. Sometimes I have to stop because the tears won't allow the eyeliner to stick. (I only wear make-up to go out.) I am not judging anyone else - just saying what keeps me sane.

 

My house is a disgrace and I'm sure some people would hate that and push themselves to clean up.

 

I am grateful for any tips to improve my appearance. I am far too overweight and I hate it. If someone can inspire me to try harder, I am happy to read it.

 

I only came here because I saw Lizzy had posted. I haven't seen the apology by this girl but I hope she is not upset as I don't think she was being critical of anyone else - just giving some advice. Is that so much different from the drug or taper advice, also given in the hope of helping?

 

Anyway, just saying.....

 

Xana

 

 

Exactly!

 

I don't know why people can't read a post, take what they can from it to help themselves and leave the rest alone. Just because it doesn't help you doesn't mean it won't help someone else.  Since there is no "Hide Story" option here just ignore it.....if it's prescriptive let the Admin/mods take care of it.

 

TS

I think a healthy beauty regeme is so valuable in recovery. I was thrilled when I saw this thread. I couldn't beleive what all she did in a positive way to get herself back to feeling good about how she looks.

 

Im vain as all get out..lol, and I love when people want to look good and celebrate them taking the steps to do it. I have put on 30lbs, my face looks way older than I used to and I walk like I had a hip replaced....however, in keeping the spirit of this thread alive, because I think it is a positive one,

 

I got a tanning membership, I may not feel healthy but I don't have to look sick either. I dye my lashes and my brows every month since I can't get makeup on everyday, at least I look awake. I use li lash, a lash extender that also is replacing my thinning lashes. They look magnificent. There is a product that has peratin in it that I apply to my hair everyday, its easy and I don't have to wash it but maybe once a month.  I finally bought some clothes that fit and are trendy and cute so I can get through the summer. I don't plan to stay at the weight forever.

 

I work in fashion, well kind of, and when I finally felt well enough to apply some little tricks to to help me be more comfortable with the way I look.

 

I definatley understand this isn't the most important thing to everyone but like lizzy mentioned, if this isn't your thing, move on to another thread. I don't think degrading those of us who are interested in how we look during withdrawl is valuable at all. Quite frankly, shame on you for making fun of one of our bb's, and especially for a thread meant to be positive! If you thought it was a joke, use your manners and wait till you know for certain.

 

Ive often wanted one of those rotating facial cleansers but I do have my boundries. I stop at 25 steps to get gorgeous. lol.

 

Be well, beauties~

Sarah~

Personally, I was quite inspired by the original post. I am very interested in how to get the bags from under my eyes and am going to try the cold milk and the fish oil tips. Bit scared of the electric toothbrush idea but might give it a blast.

 

Actually I think that how you look affects how you feel dramatically. There's nothing worse than feeling a bit OK and then looking into the mirror and seeing this sad, old face. I was sitting having coffee after an aqua aerobics class (pre withdrawal days), feeling a bit tired but pleased I had done it. A complete stranger came and asked me if I was OK. Bloody hell! I was until then. I must have looked so pale and crap with no make-up on!

 

Even when feeling really bad I think some of us still want to look decent. I can remember  the labour before having my 9lb 9 1/2 oz baby girl. I had been struggling away all day after an induction. I was in  pain and exhausted. And guess what happened during a push - yes, the worst! The nurse whisked it away. However, even in my pained and worried state (with the baby's heartbeat slowing and a foetal monitor in place) I felt so embarrassed that my male obstetrician, who had delivered my three boys previously, was in the room when that happened. You would think you were beyond caring but there is something deep inside that struggles to come out. It's our dignity.

 

I absolutely hate feeling unwashed or having hair that doesn't smell clean. I will drag myself out of bed to do washing because I would never wear dirty clothes. I put on make-up when I am in the grip of intense anxiety. Sometimes I have to stop because the tears won't allow the eyeliner to stick. (I only wear make-up to go out.) I am not judging anyone else - just saying what keeps me sane.

 

My house is a disgrace and I'm sure some people would hate that and push themselves to clean up.

 

I am grateful for any tips to improve my appearance. I am far too overweight and I hate it. If someone can inspire me to try harder, I am happy to read it.

 

I only came here because I saw Lizzy had posted. I haven't seen the apology by this girl but I hope she is not upset as I don't think she was being critical of anyone else - just giving some advice. Is that so much different from the drug or taper advice, also given in the hope of helping?

 

Anyway, just saying.....

 

Xana

 

 

Xana,

I must have posted close to you. I hear you sister! yes! yes! yes! I have been showering almost everyday. I manage foundation, mascara and lip gloss.

 

OMG, that baby story...bless your heart! that was my biggest modesty fear when offspring was born, too.

 

(((hug)))  at you not being able to get your liner on through tears. Been, there fellow bb. I have had to leave so many times sans eyeliner. I forgot to mention I tatooed on my eyeliner. I know crazy right! but I do it in my line of work for others for like 12 years. Im so glad I did. I did it in wd too.

 

I am more vigalent about my walking and yoga in withdrawl so I feel like Im tending to the health that I can. Especially when I have so little control over the weight, and how I FEEL physically.

 

Truth, the beauty part is fun. Its a positive distraction for me. Im single so thats part of it. I have to be in public. thats another piece.

 

I stand hand in hand with you here, Xana and I support Skyy, too. Meow was hilairous! lol. and most importantly I will champion for a positive thread in a forum riddled with difficulty any day all day!

 

Sarah~

 

 

Good post, Sarah. While I was reading it I was thinking about how people going through chemotherapy are offered help with their appearance.

 

I am going to make myself cry now as I dredge up some memories of how my dear sister lost all her hair and vomited her heart out through chemo. Much worse than any drug withdrawal I can assure you. I was there. I saw it. She was bald. No eyelashes. No eyebrows. She had never been a person to bother with much make up. She had 3 adopted children, 3 fostered, 2 step and then 2 biological = 10, at one stage, so not much time for self! She had 2 washing machines!

 

However she went to a session on make-up for cancer patients and came home with a bag of goodies. It cheered her up so much. I was there when the wig lady came. We actually had a good laugh. My Mum, my nephew who was my sister's carer and I all tried on wigs with my sister and took photos of each other. This might sound sick but it wasn't. We ALL laughed. My sister hated the wig because it was so hot. I will always remember when I drove her home from visiting my Mum's place. She would walk through the door and throw the wig through the air, just going bald around us - who didn't care.

 

She died at 52 leaving her 2 biological daughters aged 15 and 16.

 

Would anyone dare to mock or castigate women who were severely ill and dying for caring how they looked.

 

I think not.

 

Xana

 

Hey Sarah,

 

Our posts must have collided again! I saw your second one after I posted the last one. Thanks for that. I like the eyeliner tattoo idea!

 

Xana

 

LOL, Xana~ Great and beautiful minds think alike, eh? lol

 

I love how you all championed for your sister. I was sad, however to read that she lost that battle.  :'(

 

Love that you guys all tried on wigs, and lmao at her fipping it off when she got home! lol.

 

I wanted to be counselor when I was in highschool, in fact I was a peer counselor. I have a way with people, must have been in the "good with people line" and missed the "math" line! lol

 

Anyway, when my father discovered that I was going to go to nailschool, he was beside himself. I was already donig nails on the side for a couple years before I made this decision.

 

My line of work sometimes gets looks when I tell them, but please tell me how much you love your nail tech! It first started happening when I would get invited to family functions, sat in the back when the bride would wave to be in the main pictures!!! Why? Because I made them feel good about themselves. The nails end up being a sideline. The deep caring relationships I get to develope with "fashion" as the bond has been more rewarding then I could have ever imagined.

 

We talk about fashion, boys, carreers, health..well you know, salon stuff.

 

I market to retired communities for permanent makeup. They are the most appreciatvie clientele ever. Many can't see to put their makeup on, they have lost their brows or they have faded grey. I give them 10 years off their face, and they look great, they feel great and Im honored to get to be a part of that.

 

I have one client who is traveling the world right now. 100 places before she is 100. She doesn't have time for eyeliner, tada. I see her every year for her touch up.

 

Looking good is part of feeling good. I know in the beginning I was barely able to get out of bed, but now that I feel better...looking better helps me heal all around.

 

How lucky your neices are to have you

 

Sarah

Good post, Sarah. While I was reading it I was thinking about how people going through chemotherapy are offered help with their appearance.

 

I am going to make myself cry now as I dredge up some memories of how my dear sister lost all her hair and vomited her heart out through chemo. Much worse than any drug withdrawal I can assure you. I was there. I saw it. She was bald. No eyelashes. No eyebrows. She had never been a person to bother with much make up. She had 3 adopted children, 3 fostered, 2 step and then 2 biological = 10, at one stage, so not much time for self! She had 2 washing machines!

 

However she went to a session on make-up for cancer patients and came home with a bag of goodies. It cheered her up so much. I was there when the wig lady came. We actually had a good laugh. My Mum, my nephew who was my sister's carer and I all tried on wigs with my sister and took photos of each other. This might sound sick but it wasn't. We ALL laughed. My sister hated the wig because it was so hot. I will always remember when I drove her home from visiting my Mum's place. She would walk through the door and throw the wig through the air, just going bald around us - who didn't care.

 

She died at 52 leaving her 2 biological daughters aged 15 and 16.

 

Would anyone dare to mock or castigate women who were severely ill and dying for caring how they looked.

 

I think not.

 

Xana

 

Hi xana,

I had a good friend died from cancer.

One of the things that bothered her the most was the loss of her gorgeous hair.

 

 

Sometimes when you have everything taken from you I think it helps to put on some make up and feel like you do look your best? I see nothing wrong with it.

 

I am glad the bag of goodies cheered up your sister

 

Amusing comments, ladies. I may go out and buy another toothbrush. Nakedbutterfly may be a little over the top for some but there is a take home message here. I'd like to know how  her taper is going. Diet and exercise probably play huge roles in recovery from a physiologic/ biochemical standpoint. I'll bet attention to appearance (I know nothing about the details) has a substantially positive effect on the psychological aspects of recovery. I'll take the positive here and maybe pass on the toothbrush and cotton balls.