Author Topic: An experience like no other  (Read 171701 times)

[Buddie]

Re: An experience like no other
« Reply #1580 on: August 06, 2019, 04:58:21 pm »
[...] you are a angel! I pray that you receive so many blessings!!!

❤️
Hi [...] :)

You are an Angel, not me. But, I thank you for thinking that I am.

I agree [...], you are an angel!  :smitten:
Hi [...] :)
Ok, you girls win!  it's 2 against 1.  I will iron my wrinkled and tattered Angel Wings, making myself respectful enough to walk with you two dear Earth Angels.
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: An experience like no other
« Reply #1581 on: August 06, 2019, 05:02:29 pm »
Thanks [...]

We met a few years ago when I was [...] off benzos. Iíve now been off all my meds for almost 3 years. The benzos five years. The antidepressant three years and the gabapentin almost 3 years. Iím [...] in a living mental nightmare I am trying to hold on. So words of encouragement help thank you again
Hi [...] :)

You're off all the drugs.  That's Outstanding! 

Keep holding onto the [...] that your mental nightmare will soon turn into a pleasant, (come true) dream.  A dream that becomes a reality, where you, and everything in your world are okay again.

May your life be surrounded by much peace and happiness.
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: An experience like no other
« Reply #1582 on: August 07, 2019, 06:08:39 am »
P
Thanks for being there I [...] youíre right buddy. What worries me the most is I had depression And anxiety before meds. Now itís 1000 times worse. But everybody tells me not to worry that will it will all go away. I [...] theyíre right. Iím never going on meds again. And Iíve tried everything under the sun to get better but nothing Has worked. I went bankrupt trying. I force myself to my job to keep a roof over my head. And [...] everybodyís rightj
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: An experience like no other
« Reply #1583 on: August 08, 2019, 11:28:56 am »
Hi [...],

Did you have issues exercising? Any sort of physical stress or exertion brings on headaches, worse insomnia, and depression. When did the insomnia let up and was it a gradual improvement?

Iíve been off 15 months from less than two weeks of use and insomnia and exercise intolerance are my two biggest remaining issues. The Groundhogs Day routine is really wearing on me.
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: An experience like no other
« Reply #1584 on: August 08, 2019, 02:57:06 pm »
Hi [...],

You were on benzos for only two weeks.  I was on benzos for three years.  Some folks were on benzos for thirty years, and not one of us had withdrawal symptoms in exactly the same way. 
That is why withdrawals are so confusing and so hard to understand. 

The one thing we all have in common, no matter the length of time we were on benzos, is that it takes time to heal. Time can be a fleeting thing or time can move slower than a snail.  But eventually everyone will get there, by there, I mean to the end of their dark benzo journey to the bright light of benzo freedom.  No more pain, no more insomnia, no more worrying and wondering if and when you will be healed, because time and patience will have healed you.

The insidious, and harmful ways in which benzos affects us all so differently, leads us to having more questions than for which there are answers.

Insomnia, as it is with most folks when withdrawing from benzos, was one of my worst symptoms.  After I went cold turkey off of the Ativan and the Ambien, ( two horrendous drugs), I literally did not sleep for many days at a time.
My ability to sleep came back, not magically all at once, but in stages.  My brain was working overtime to repair whatever it was that regulates sleep.  I tried not to obsess about not sleeping (not easy to do), I know.

Until your sleep cycle is repaired, and straightens itself out, you can expect sporadic sleep.  Some nights only an hour or two of sleep, some nights maybe three or four hours of sleep.  Other nights, no sleep. There is no rhyme or reason to it.  It's beyond frustrating.  It's downright maddening. 

It makes you want to pound your pillow like a crazy person.  That's the way it was for me. 

I stayed away from all over- the- counter sleep aids.  My reasoning was that my brain was already compromised, and confused enough from the benzos.  Why feed it more drugs and make it go more haywire than it already was.

For the first couple of months of withdrawals, because of the muscle contractions and electric shocks in my legs, I could not exercise.  After that, exercising was not a problem.  I'm sorry that it is [...] a problem for you. 
Perhaps, if you are not already doing so, taking gentle walks, for the length of time that you are able to, preferably in a serene, [...] place where there is an abundance of nature's beauty, will be beneficial in helping resolve some of the issues that you are dealing with.

[...], I do wish you the very best.  Dealing with withdrawals is like starting out on a journey and being blind-sided by a hundred miles of bad road. There are many detours, and there are many bumps along the way.       

[...]
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: An experience like no other
« Reply #1585 on: August 08, 2019, 03:48:43 pm »
Hi [...],

Thank you for posting this wonderful success story.

I was wondering if you could shed some light on agoraphobia and monophobia if you had these at all. I'm now 4+ months out and [...] have severe symptoms, cannot be by myself or go out anywher alone. The thought of going to the Park freaks me out if I'm not with someone. I was traumatized post jump by an ER visit which separated me and my family.

If you had these symptoms, is it something that just fades away, or should I expose and challenge myself with goals of being alone?
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: An experience like no other
« Reply #1586 on: August 08, 2019, 06:04:19 pm »
Hi there,

Don't worry too much about trying to challenge yourself to ignore your phobias.  They are very real to you for now ( thanks to the benzos).  The benzos put them in your mind, and time will take them away from your mind. 

It's all about the benzos and how they changed your thinking.  You will be fine.  Those phobias are not permanent. They WILL go away.

I had some Agoraphobia for a very short time, but Monophobia (fear of being alone) yes, I had that one, big time for probably three  months. 
The benzos trick us and fool our minds in the most unbelievable ways.
I was a guy who rode horses and motorcycles, and the benzos  reduced me to someone who was afraid of most everything and also scared to be alone.  For pete's sake, here I was a grown man who had to sleep with a night light on, something I wouldn't have done as a young child.

The thought of dying was constantly on my mind.  If I saw a commercial for a funeral home, I would go into a mild panic and pace around the room for what seemed like the longest time.  [...] crazy, right?
I shake my head in disbelieve when I think back to those screwed-up days.  Benzos have to be the most bizarre, mind-altering drugs in existence!

You are perfectly normal.  Your fears of being alone or out in a crowd by yourself are very common withdrawal symptoms.  I have read hundreds of post where folks are talking about the same phobias that you are dealing with.

Those benzo induced phobias will fade away.  Mine just faded away without my even realizing it.  They left as silently as they came.
If you had none of those phobias before you took benzos, you can rest assured that they are benzo related, and you will indeed recover from them.

The very best to you.

[...]
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: An experience like no other
« Reply #1587 on: September 29, 2019, 11:21:21 pm »
P.J.!!

You are [...] here and giving people such [...]. You are such a decent human. You have my great, humble respect old friend!
❤️
[...]
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: An experience like no other
« Reply #1588 on: October 01, 2019, 07:50:57 pm »
Thank you for the kind words, [...] :)  It warms my heart, to once again see your name appear when I logged onto BenzoBuddies.

Congratulations to you for all that you have accomplished.

You suffered greatly, yet, you did not let your suffering harden your heart.  You ignored your own pain while soothing another's pain.  You have been a true,true friend to many folks on the BenzoBuddies forums. 

Without hesitation, you unselfishly befriended and consoled others who were lost and all alone. You were a friend to the friendless, and a [...] to the motherless.   

Your Oklahoma Sooners and my Notre Dame Irish do not meet this year ;)  May they both have a terrific season!  And may you have a terrific life!

Your friend, [...]
   
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.