Extreme anxiety! God help me! Support please!

Working on 2 hours of sleep (6 hours in the past 3 days).  Near complete panic all night.  Tried all of the techniques I know of.  Breathing, body scan (3 times), binaural beats, food, slow walking around the house.  The worst I have experienced in my life and I have experienced a fair amount.  I am terrified to have my wife go to work.  I am now trying distraction. 

 

Requesting emergency support.  I don't want to go to the ER!

I am so sorry you are going through this. I know how you are feeling, I experiance this too. What help do you need? Is there anything I can do for you?

Josephine

I really don't know.  I just need to keep myself from freaking out.  I know that would only make things worse.  After a long withdrawal, this extreme level of anxiety is new to me.  How can I cope?

So sorry. Don't resist it. Ask yourself what is the worst that can happen? I asked that question just yesterday and "death" came to my mind. I'm pretty OK with death, if it occurs naturally so it doesn't scare me. 

 

Many times, we can make the anxiety worse by fighting it. Let it know it's not in charge and you're not going to play that game. I give mine an innocuous name. I call mine Bubba.  I'll go so far as to say, "bring it on, Bubba!"  This gives me some power.

 

I hope others weigh in. We are all so different. You just never know which technique will work for you. But when you hear it, it will ring true for you.

Sorry you're suffering,

Flip

I really try to distract myself the best I can (using several techniques).  I'm not sure if that is fighting it or giving into it.  All I know is that the bed and couch are toxic.  I so wish I could take a nap!

So sorry. Don't resist it. Ask yourself what is the worst that can happen? I asked that question just yesterday and "death" came to my mind. I'm pretty OK with death, if it occurs naturally so it doesn't scare me. 

 

Many times, we can make the anxiety worse by fighting it. Let it know it's not in charge and you're not going to play that game. I give mine an innocuous name. I call mine Bubba.  I'll go so far as to say, "bring it on, Bubba!"  This gives me some power.

 

I hope others weigh in. We are all so different. You just never know which technique will work for you. But when you hear it, it will ring true for you.

Sorry you're suffering,

Flip

I like that idea about giving it a name. Maybe I will try that out.

Josephine

Try to accept it as it comes, welcome the feelings, move towards them. The more you resist, the more it pounds. I think what can help is when you feel the sensations of anxiety, ask for more, yell out loud "is that all you got"! Of course those feelings are never pleasant to feel, but if you work with them by accepting it, it sure helps. Its only natural to resist when we are in a ton of fear and as far as the worst thing happening (sorry flip, im not with you on this) ... the worst thing that can realistically happen is a panic attack, anxiety and panic will not harm us. Trust the process of life my friend, it will all be ok, you are still healing, it all takes time. You will be smiling from ear to ear a lot sooner that you think.

Thanks Frontsider.  I really appreciate it.  I just got back from a my 4th long walk today.  I'm exhausted and just can't keep walking 24/7!  I feel like I'm going to give in and start the screaming and panic. 

Sorry Frontsider,

 

I should really thank you again for your powerful message.  It means a lot.  The beast just has a very tight grip on me this week. 

Chinook, you sound like me around month 7.  I spent so much time walking because that was one of the only things that helped.  It feels like you have to keep walking to prevent the anxiety from catching up you.  I spent several mornings and afternoons walking and listening to Claire Weekes cds.

 

It did subside for me after a few weeks and my w/d symptoms and anxiety went back to "tolerable".  Maybe try some distractions like computer games.  Even if it only takes away 10% of your concentration from your anxiety that is better than nothing. 

 

Withdrawal is pretty much mostly about passing time until we get better.

 

 

 

 

 

Thanks Crono!  You are right, its all about passing time and finding the easiest way to do it. 

Chinook sorry you are going through this.  I';ve been there with extreme anxiety and constant panic.  I know how rough it could be.  I still have it a lot too and nothing at all sets it off.  It just does it on its own.  Some of the things I think really helped me was just trying to stay focused on something.  Anything.  Read, Write, Listen to Music, or whatever you can do to keep your mind on stomehting.  Also I did a ton of stretching when I was in full blown panic mode.  The stretching was the one of the only things that would really help ground me and put me back in my body.  Chamomile Tea worked well for calming me down.  And as others have said, walking.  But I know how worn out from walking all the time.  During my first couple months of benzos, when I was at the heigth of not stop panic, all i would do is walk and stretch.  All day.  It was insane.  I thought my legs were gonnna fall off. But it did work a bit.  hang in there man.  It will get better and pass. 

Good idea with walking. I cant express how much exercise plays a vital role in reducing anxiety. It works wonders. I just got an elliptical 2 days ago and I have been doing 20 min sessions on it. Its been great for my anxiety. Im now reading a book called "spark" and it talks about alot of things that happens after you exercise to get rid of anxiety, stress, depression, and brain function. Im liking what I am reading and am now going to do cardio or other exercising at least 4 times a week. Id like to be able to do 30 min intense workouts soon. Hope you are doing ok, despite the rough anxiety week. Sometimes it just gets the best of us and we just have to roll with it. But it always passes, keep that in mind.

I don't know where you are, but I spent those long days wrapped in a blanket either sitting in a lawn chair or laying on my daughter's trampoline! Being outside seemed to calm me as I watched the birds, squirrels, and trees. I would even lay out there at night sometimes.

 

Lay in a chair, lay on the floor, listen to quiet music, lay in the bathtub...do whatever you have to do to watch the minutes pass, because they do keep passing. You don't have to be strong, just keep going!

You guys are great.  Thank you so much for all of your suggestions.  I really appreciate it. 

 

Speaking of being outside.  We had a rare dry day in the Pacific Northwest today.  I wrapped myself in three blankets and laid on my deck.  It was cold (about 45 degrees F).  It lasted about 15 minutes, then huge anxiety (i.e., a normal toxic nap).  Jumped up and went for a walk. 

I really don't know.  I just need to keep myself from freaking out.  I know that would only make things worse.  After a long withdrawal, this extreme level of anxiety is new to me.  How can I cope?

I can tell you what I do. Mine is severe and I wake up with it and it can last from 2 hours, 7 hours to all day and night. It centers in my stomach and is painful. It is worse now than it was before I started the klonopin. I drink chamomile tea and that sometimes calms it down a notch. I have given up all caffein, try to stay away from sugar. I notice that once I get up and moving it will be very low, but then when I sit down it increases. I try to keep on a routine, get out of the house to the gym, shopping, errands, more housework. Also reading helps, keeps my mind off it. I read a lot of the time. Keeping my mind occupied helps. There are days that it keeps me down and housebound and I just breath through it.

I always read what others are doing for theirs and try some of these things, you never know, they might work for me.

You are not alone in this. Keep talking to others and try their suggestions.

Hope you can find some relief from this.

Josephine

About 6 hours of sleep in the past 4 nights.  Zero sleep last night and a 3-6 am panic attack.  My wife (and what literally felt like the hand of God) pulled me out but I feel like I am done.  The idea of food makes me want to through up.  I have no fight left in me.  I can't function right now. 

 

What are my options?  Please help me.  Walking was the only thing keeping me going.  Now I'm too tired.  No more benzos.  I don't want any drugs but I want to stay alive.  Remeron?  Anything else for anxiety/sleep?

I know it feels like it will, but this will not kill you.  I know that's what your benzo brain is screaming at you right now...I'm dying!!  But no, you are not.  There's not much I can tell you that will help other than you have to ride it out.  One thing that might possibly help is an epsom salt bath.  It would have to be luke warm so as not to get your heart going faster, but it might just help calm you down a little.

Chinook,

 

I was given Vistaril for my anxiety...it is commonly prescribed for nausea, motion sickness and anxiety...there are quite a few people on here that do use it or have used it...for some it can cause drowsiness...which in w/d can be a blessing...it is somewhat like an antihistamine.

 

Others use Propanolol which is normally a blood pressure medicine...I asked my pdoc about this but she didn't want me to use it because she said it can make depression worse, which is a big issue for me as well...

 

Might be worth mentioning these to your doctor...sure hope you get some relief!  I do terrible if I spend too much time lying awake in bed or sitting on the couch so I can definitely relate...luckily I feel pretty good physically so as long as I keep myself distracted I do okay...sounds like the walks are your best bet right now...wish I could walk outside right now...too cold here.

 

Best of luck to you.

 

 

Chinook, wondering if your anxiety is caused mainly by the nerve pain--the reason you started a benzo in the first place--or do you think it's the withdrawal? Is that why you're not sleeping or the withdrawal itself?

 

I started clonazepam due to pain as well, and the first two months of my taper were fine. The last few days, my physical pain has kicked up and nothing like aspirin, ibuprofen, etc. touches it.

 

It's times like these that I really miss the benzo!

 

I hate seeing my face in the mirror because I can see the pain there and there are suddenly more wrinkles just in the last couple of days. Very difficult being with people I know.

P.S. I do the epsom salt baths for magnesium in water as hot as I can stand. Since I'd turn into a prune if I took too many in a day, I put a cup of the epsom salts in a big pot of water and soak my feet as an alternative. I use that water again, reheating one more time. There's a magnesium oil that I rub on my feet before bed.

 

I'm late taking my first dose of clonazepam today and decided to test a supplement to see if it works before taking my dose. It has passion flower and tart cherry in it and I can feel my anxiety is a little less. So I think it's working (sometimes things only work the first time for me though. Keeping my fingers crossed!)