How did you decide it was time to come off benzos?

Hi all,

I have been on Ativan for around 5 years now. Every single day I battle with myself to stop taking this medication, but I never do. I told my PCP I wanted to taper off and she agreed and we made a plan. Unfortunately, I have yet to follow through with this plan. I have continued to tell her that I am tapering, when in reality I am taking more Ativan and coming up with excuses as to why I run out early. I know I need to come off, I am just too hesitant to start. Ativan numbs my feelings, and I’m afraid of what will happen when I no longer have that. I am physically and mentally dependent on it, and I want off. What was the straw that broke the camels back for you? What made to decide enough is enough? I just want my life back, any stories or encouragement is welcome, thank you.

When my doctor made a mistake in my prescription and I had an accidental cut of 75% where I ended up in severe accute benzo hell, I did not want to be a slave to pills. I had no idea what was happening to me. Then this idiot doctor cut me off. Trying to find a new doctor to prescribe was very traumatic. I don't want to be at the mercy of doctors for the rest of my life. I'm also Australian by the way.

 

 

I'll echo jelly baby to some degree.  My doctor surprised me at my routine office visit in late 2019 by telling me she wanted me off clonazepam.  Gulp.  It was a shock to say the least - I had been on them for 21 years.  But I went home and thought it through after I settled down a bit.  I had known for a while that I was in tolerance and having interdose withdrawl.  Sooo, I decided to try tapering a bit on my own to see what happened.  I definitely was NOT committed to getting off them entirely.  To my surprise, I did fairly well with the initial cuts I so I simply kept going.  By then I had joined BenzoBuddies and come out of denial about my deteriorating relationship with clonazepam.  After some some rough days and nights and a hiccup or two, six months later I was off clonazepam entirely.

 

About a year after I finished my taper, the system my doctor worked for came to her office and closed her down on a Friday afternoon.  There was no number to call for refills, nothing.  Had I still been on benzos, I would have been up a creek to say the least.  I consider it more than just good luck that I was off benzos by the time she was no longer around for refills.   

Hi awesomeaussie15,

 

my simple answer is: because my Benzo had totally lost efficacy. I was on my original Benzo for years for insomnia, because I had gotten tinnitus. For months I thought my Benzo was a miracle drug: pop a pill and sleep. No worries about my tinnitus; I could cope as long as I slept.

 

When I realized my Benzo wasn't working anymore and I was sleeping worse and worse, month my month, I was still in "I need a pill to sleep"- mode. When I searched online for alternitives I found Z-drugs and had my GP prescribe me that. I switched instantly and obviously it went very, very wrong. I quit Benzos c/t after years and I had a psychosis a week later. Also, the Z-drug didn't help at all.

 

Upon stumbeling against the Ashton Manual, I realized the meds could actually cause insomnia! So this is when I knew for sure, that I had to be free from these evil drugs.

 

Naf1983

 

Hi all,

I have been on Ativan for around 5 years now. Every single day I battle with myself to stop taking this medication, but I never do. I told my PCP I wanted to taper off and she agreed and we made a plan. Unfortunately, I have yet to follow through with this plan. I have continued to tell her that I am tapering, when in reality I am taking more Ativan and coming up with excuses as to why I run out early. I know I need to come off, I am just too hesitant to start. Ativan numbs my feelings, and I’m afraid of what will happen when I no longer have that. I am physically and mentally dependent on it, and I want off. What was the straw that broke the camels back for you? What made to decide enough is enough? I just want my life back, any stories or encouragement is welcome, thank you.

When I stopped taking them abruptly after 3 weeks use back in September 2020. I didn't have a clue what benzo withdrawal was and I wasn't aware of what I had got myself into. Went through horrific withdrawals for a few days before I reluctantly started taking them again just so I could function. (I was starting a new job at the time and I felt like I had no choice). Since then, I've been trying to get off them. Nearly two years later and after finally completing a successful taper, I'm finally off them.

When they stopped working

I slowly started realizing that everything doctors told me was all made up bullshit. I also saw more and more stories and videos of people who came off all medication and they all were completely healed.

 

20 years of illness after just one nervous breakdown? No way. This is pure medication. There was never anything wrong with me.

 

I realized that the only way I would only be happy is to come off all drugs.