I'm doing well, despite my taper!

Hi everyone,

 

my taper off 90 miligrams of Flurazepam (Dalmane) started TERRIBLY. Then the yet unknown to me Ashton Manual, I basically went cold turkey. After almost killing myself I put myself on around 7.5mg. of Diazepam (Valium). Months of Benzo Hell, torture and terror followed. It took me months to realize what was happening to me, which was too rapid withdrawal. I am psychially dependend on these terrible drugs. Mentally I want nothing to do with them.

 

Naively thinking I'd kick the addiction in a month, I figured I'd deal with the terrible insomnia for that time. After months, my body and mind were broken. I was and am willing to get off the Benzo's, but I couldn't tolerate the insomnia. Lord knows the list of withdrawal symptoms are endless and that time and time alone is the cure.

 

I've been taking Promethazine 50mg., an antihistamine as a sleep aid during withdrawal, like Ashton mentions ("if sleeping is really a problem" YES IT IS/WAS). It's not a miracle drug (no drugs are), but it does help. Any cut I make will cause some insomnia for a while. At least I'm getting around 7 or 8 hours of sleep in stead of 4 or 5.

 

I've had very good times recently, despite my withdrawal. I know that makes me lucky, as some suffer until or even after taking the final Benzo. For me, a positive mindset (which can be impossible sometimes, I know), CAREFULLY MICROTAPER are ways to help.

 

Wishing all of you the best!

Greetings, Naf

From the Netherlands

You've had to learn about benzo's the hard way as so many of us do but I'm glad to see you educated yourself and are now managing to live your life, and I love your positive attitude, I believe its a key element to our recovery. 

Well done Naf. Proud of you. Keep going. You are doing great 🙂