Author Topic: RIDICULOUS DOCTOR QUOTES---ADD YOURS HERE  (Read 9964 times)

[Buddie]

Re: RIDICULOUS DOCTOR QUOTES---ADD YOURS HERE
« Reply #140 on: January 01, 2020, 05:18:20 pm »
Visited the Doctor about a what turned out to be a chest infection, 

 Me ..Doctor can you listen to my chest I think I may have an infection,

Doctor, .. You haven't got a chest infection it's your anxiety, and further more I wish to add that no matter what you say ,  I do not believe in withdrawal symptoms,  there is no such thing ,  All yours are anxiety.

Really? 

Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: RIDICULOUS DOCTOR QUOTES---ADD YOURS HERE
« Reply #141 on: January 01, 2020, 09:13:13 pm »
My beef: my doc doesn't remember because she doesn't take notes and every visit she has no idea of where I am at in the taper.  I'm in an endless line of patients and  she apparently “wings it”.  My therapist is a nice lady.... but.....

Therapist: So, now you're at .5 mg 3 times a day........
Me: No...I've been holding on a single .5mg K tablet/day for the last 3 months. You may recall I've mentioned this living hell and I've finally been considering an updose.
Therapist: So....... you're ready to drop another quarter.......
My thought: wtf ...?
Therapist: Let's switch you to Valium and you'll feel better.....   
My thought: wtf ...?
Therapist: I'll write a script for diazepam and starting tonight, take 3 mg V ...three times/day.
Me: That seems rather sudden.....
Therapist: I did this with another patient last week and she's doing fine.
Me: Is it possible for me to talk with the other patient ??
Both of us: …..awkward silence..........
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: RIDICULOUS DOCTOR QUOTES---ADD YOURS HERE
« Reply #142 on: January 02, 2020, 01:14:47 am »
This is great.  Really hilarious, sad and scary ALL in one!!!  I could come up with a lot of these but this is the most recent.

Went to neurologist, headache doctor, just for one year routine appt so I don't get cancelled as a patient - not related to benzo w/d.  However, I explain that I'm now in benzo w/d trying to taper, just crossed over to Valium.  Tell her about all my crazy symptoms.

Her:  I've never heard of that before.  I don't usually prescribe benzos but I've never had a patient with those symptoms in benzo w/d. 

Me:  Well, it's happening to me.  My idiot psychiatrist had me hold my taper too long after coming down from a higher dose and I went into acute tolerance w/d.  Most doctors aren't benzo wise. 

Her:  Well, .5 mg of Klonopin is a really low dose.  I usually taper my patients down .5 mg of Klonopin per week.  So if they are on 1.5 mg, I will have them take 1 mg for one week, .5 mg for one week and then stop.

Me:  (Mouth hanging open.....then) What?  That's WAY too fast.  Most people are going to have a lot of problems going that quickly.

Her:  (Eye rolls).  I think I know what I'm talking about.  I went to medical school and had training for this sort of stuff. 

Well, won't be going back there again.  IDIOT!!
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: RIDICULOUS DOCTOR QUOTES---ADD YOURS HERE
« Reply #143 on: January 10, 2020, 10:15:18 pm »
After 5 years in bed from a brutal withdrawal and losing $300,000 and becoming penniless my doctor congratulated me on my mental resolve for finishing my withdrawal

And then he told me that he and his doctor friends joke amongst themselves by calling alprazolam (Xanax)
 Alcatraz-alam because it makes people so crazy.

Don't you think you should have told me before you prescribed it?

And then he said for a man your age, 61, our target is 6 medications.

I said my target is zero

SEE YA!

[...]
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: RIDICULOUS DOCTOR QUOTES---ADD YOURS HERE
« Reply #144 on: January 10, 2020, 10:32:26 pm »
After 5 years in bed from a brutal withdrawal and losing $300,000 and becoming penniless my doctor congratulated me on my mental resolve for finishing my withdrawal

And then he told me that he and his doctor friends joke amongst themselves by calling alprazolam (Xanax)
 Alcatraz-alam because it makes people so crazy.

Don't you think you should have told me before you prescribed it?

And then he said for a man your age, 61, our target is 6 medications.

I said my target is zero

SEE YA!

[...]

Hi [...]!

It's nice to see you posting again!  I see you are doing well, I'm very happy for you.

Target is 6 medications??? Yikes, I'm with you, I'm 69 and my goal is zero. So far so good!

[...]  :smitten:
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: RIDICULOUS DOCTOR QUOTES---ADD YOURS HERE
« Reply #145 on: January 11, 2020, 08:14:47 am »
"The only way I would feel comfortable continuing to prescribe xanax for you is if you sign up for my life coaching classes."
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: RIDICULOUS DOCTOR QUOTES---ADD YOURS HERE
« Reply #146 on: January 23, 2020, 04:36:54 pm »
In detox I was trying to make myself stay in a good mood. So I tried joking with the DR.
I said you probably think I look so much like Angelina Jolie that you are confused.
He said. I would never confuse you with Angelina Jolie.
Yikes? And he did even say it nicely?
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: RIDICULOUS DOCTOR QUOTES---ADD YOURS HERE
« Reply #147 on: January 27, 2020, 02:35:51 am »
When I asked my doctor how long it's going to take for me to withdraw from clonazepam after taking it for 3 years, he said with great confidence" count one month for each year you took it, it will be 3 months at most", that's what I completely expected when I quit.. here I am still 21 months later.. needless to say, I don't go see that doctor any more)..
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: RIDICULOUS DOCTOR QUOTES---ADD YOURS HERE
« Reply #148 on: January 30, 2020, 07:41:21 am »
After 5 years in bed from a brutal withdrawal and losing $300,000 and becoming penniless my doctor congratulated me on my mental resolve for finishing my withdrawal

And then he told me that he and his doctor friends joke amongst themselves by calling alprazolam (Xanax)
 Alcatraz-alam because it makes people so crazy.

Don't you think you should have told me before you prescribed it?

And then he said for a man your age, 61, our target is 6 medications.

I said my target is zero

SEE YA!

[...]

These sadists (doctors) had my 80+ Mother-in-Law on well over 20 medications. She literally had her guest bedroom converted into what she called her “pill room”.  Bottles were lined up everywhere. She was so poly drugged no one knew how to dispense her “medications” in any meaningful order.  It was a clusterfuck. 

Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: RIDICULOUS DOCTOR QUOTES---ADD YOURS HERE
« Reply #149 on: January 30, 2020, 03:12:47 pm »
Just cut out one of your doses.
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.