Thanks for answering my questions, the reason I asked is because some people can get off of these drugs with little to no problem but it doesn't sound like you're one of them, I'm sorry.
Its not a requirement to cross over to Diazepam, most members will taper directly from their current medication but you not having a prescription and not knowing the exact nature of your pills will make this challenging but as long as you can continue to get a supply, you can successfully taper.
We don't expect payment and its against forum policy to break anonymity, but you can get all of the information, support and tools you need to do this on the open forum so no worries, we'll help you do this.
If you'll start a thread on the taper board we can get started on helping you plan your taper, this is the link you'll use.
http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?board=56.0