Fight or flight doesn't feel like panic anymore.

[[Buddie]]

Hi all.

Straight-up looking for reassurance and that I'm not losing my mind or lost a part of my brain.

The further into this I get, the more "fight or flight" doesn't feel at all like panic. It feels like a numbed out, underlying, and more chronic feeling than a high and low peak. Like adrenaline/cortisol/ fear doesn't feel like a "holy sh*t" moment anymore-its like this scary just "normal" baseline of the feeling of "Oh, I'm going to die now. Something bad is happening but my body feels numb still." This is worse for me because at least with panic, I had all the "normal" signs to differentiate it. It didn't feel as integrated into my mind/body.

Does anyone else get this? Any tips or helpful thoughts?

[[Buddie]]

I think that's pretty dang normal for us.  At least for me on my bad days.  Feeling like you're going to die or your heart is going to explode out your chest and just feeling on edge. 

You're not losing your mind.  It's just benzo recovery.  I try to stay busy and distract and I walk a lot.  Bad days I'll walk constantly, as much as I can. 

It's good you're not panicking anymore- that's a positive sign things are moving in the right direction

[[Buddie]]

It's actually the opposite of this-I'm terrified but my heart *doesn't* explode out of my chest. I miss this aspect. Now everything is calm and dark. It's still terror but not the same, like an intense numbness or DPDR. This isn't a sign of recovery, it's like a shroud or veil of sort.

[[Buddie]]

Yep. I’m 26 months off and this is exactly how I feel.

I believe it’s because the amygdala (fear center of the brain) is the one part of my brain that has actually healed.

Now I feel like I’m living with some auto immune disease bc of withdrawal rather than actual benzo withdrawal. If only the other parts of my brain would heal.

[[Buddie]]

That’s because you’re in the freeze response now. DPDR is the freeze response. Your mind and body are too tired from the constant fight or flight it’s gone into this mode to protect itself.

[[Buddie]]

More so here now also with sometimes panic, depression and detached and thinking I must not be ok. Lots of brain fog and feeling of loss

[[Buddie]]

I can really relate to this.  As I reduced my benzo dose during my taper, that awful anxiety/panic left but I had become so used to those feelings that it felt really strange to be void of them.  It took time to adapt to the new, more peaceful me but I really enjoy it now.   

[[Buddie]]

I have the same feeling exactly, not that miserable like in the acute but still.
From the scariest and most disgusting situation now I react with no fight or flight at all, I actually have just sensations in my genitals that causes me more questions about how "damaged I'm".
When something scary happens I have the feeling that I'll climax in my genitals without any heart increase rate and other body sensations, just genital and I'm also feeling that my brain is not the same anymore and doesn't correspond with my body in the right way.
Very grotesque and slow motion feeling..
I'm like frozen.
But will pass for sure.
The brain actually protects us with dp dr.
Will pass, don't worry.

[[Buddie]]

10 months out and having that same feeling but still with some panic thrown in for kicks and giggles,  yeah thanks Benzos