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skyblue4321


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Suffering heavily from ativan withdrawal...  proscribed .5 MG and and latter 1MG for around a year or two.  The dosage was increased in the Month of March 2022 to 1.5.  I temporarily ran out at the end of March and horribly mentally crashed.  I renewed my prescription.  And I immediately started to to taper off during the month of April.  I have not had any Ativan for six days, but i am having horrible withdrawal symptoms.  The only thing that is keeping my from going crazy is red wine mixed with water and orange juice.
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Hello skyblue4321, welcome to BenzoBuddies,

 

Your taper was too fast, we recommend reducing your dose by about 5-10% every couple of weeks depending on your symptoms, they should guide your taper.  Would you consider reinstating and doing a slow taper to hopefully get some functionality back?  If you don't choose to do this then you need to know these symptoms will most likely last for a few months or more but even if you do go back on the Ativan and taper you'll face difficult symptoms. 

 

The reason the alcohol is helping you is because it affects the same part of the brain as the Ativan does so you're giving it what it needs in liquid form.  I'll provide you with a few links to help you navigate the forum but please let us know how we can help you.

 

Pamster

 

Colorado Consortium Benzodiazepine Deprescribing Guidelines

 

Planning Your Withdrawal (Taper)

 

Withdrawal Support (during your taper)

 

The Ashton Manual

 

Post-withdrawal Recovery Support

 

Cold Turkey, Detox & Rapid Withdrawal 

 

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Thank you for the info. 

 

Unfortunately, I didn't read the Ashton Manual until after I ended the taper and went into severe withdrawal.  I now realize I was crazy to try to do it so quickly over just a month.  I am now very reluctantly wondering if I should start over with a reinstatement.  Though, part of me is wondering if I can power through these terrible mornings and nights with my my red wine/water/orange mixture.  I'm like clockwork somewhat ok in the late afternoon and early evening. 

 

I have been pretty desperately trying to switch to a new psychiatrist.  I am meeting with my current psychiatrist today, even though I have almost completely lost confidence in his abilities.  I am dreading meeting him today.

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One question: how is it possible to taper by 5 to 10% when the .5 MG Ativan pills are so small.  I cut them in half for my last four days and I supposed it might be possible to quarter them, but it seem impossible to cut up those tiny pills any smaller?
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I quit cold turkey which is pretty much what you did and I made it through it so if you decide to stay benzo free you have just as much chance for recovery as anyone else.  The purpose of a slow taper is to be able to live your life while eliminating the drug but even doing that its a difficult process.

 

When I say months I want you to understand that the symptoms you're feeling now will change, sometimes they'll lessen, other times they'll increase.  Sometimes your symptoms will change or leave only to come back or be replaced by others but gradually you'll improve so please don't let my words frighten you. 

 

We have lots of clever ways to get the tablets smaller if you decide to reinstate, here are some Titration FAQ's.

 

Let us know how your appointment went.

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I reinstated. 

 

I am now on Ativan .25 MG before I go to bed and Ativan .25 MG when I wake up in the morning.  I am starting 14 MG of Mirtazapine before bed.

 

He also suggested I stop taking the Buspar and Hydroxyzine that another doctor had given me, saying they were not strong enough to help me.

 

I was able to sleep through the night for the first time in 6 days and I am feeling fine right now, but I am disappointed to be back on the Ativan.

 

Because I am going back on at such a low dose, I am hoping that it will eventually be easier to taper off. 

 

My doctor said he was fine with me tapering of the Ativan completely, but was very vague about any timetable.

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I'm relieved to hear you reinstated, I know you're disappointed but you've now had a taste of the power of these drugs and we can't take this situation lightly.  Please don't attempt to taper until you've had a chance to stabilize, I'm unsure if the amount he started you back on will be enough and if it isn't then we need to consider this your first reduction and your body needs time to get used to it.  Going off and on medications can also affect you so this is another reason to hold this dose.

 

We can help you with a taper plan if your doctor doesn't have one or it's too fast, let us know how we can help.

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Update

 

The past seven days I have been taking 15 MG of Mirtazapine, .25 mg of Ativan when I wake up in the middle of the night around 3am, and another .25 of Ativan when i wake up in the morning feeling severe anxiety and depression. 

 

Taking the .25 around 3am usually gets me back to sleep and the severe anxiety and depression that i wake up with seems to decrease somewhat after I take the .25 in the morning.

 

Overall, I am feeling kind of hopeless.  I still feel somewhat normal in the late afternoon and early evenings.  But I dread the mornings. 

 

I am meeting with my psychiatrist today.  I'm going to ask him to increase my Mirtazapine to 30 MG.  He proscribed me 10 MG of Zaleplon, but I have not taken any as of yet. I am also still drinking red wine mixed with water and orange juice periodically.  It is the only thing that takes the edge of the severe anxiety.

 

Any advice?  Do I need to switch to a longer lasting Benzo to successfully taper off?  Should I ask my psychiatrist for any particular prescription to help with my tolerance withdrawal and waking up in the middle night? 

 

Right now, my only hope is that the Mirtazapine will eventually kick in and lessen my depression and anxiety and make it easier to stop taking one of the .25 Ativan tablets. 

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I hope you won't take the Zaleplon, its called a non-benzodiazepine but it acts in the brain in a similar way to benzo's and it's half life is so short you'll develop interdose withdrawal symptoms.  I know about this first hand because after my cold turkey from Klonopin I started taking Ambien and suffered horribly until I stopped taking it.  I'm horrified your psychiatrist recommended it, it shows me he has no idea what he's doing.

 

I feel you're undermedicated on the Ativan, you were taking 1.5 mgs then tapered to 0 then reinstated at .50, its not enough but if you hold longer, your body could eventually stabilize, I don't know.

 

Mornings are pretty much bad for everyone around here, they describe feeling better as the day wears on, some say it has something to do with cortisol levels. 

 

I don't know anything about Mirtazapine only that we have many members trying to taper off of it and it's not pleasant so keep this in mind.

 

Many members can taper from Ativan directly but some do switch to Valium but that can be rough too.  Would dosing more often help get you through the day a little easier?

 

Please don't consider just stopping one of your doses of .25, your taper needs to be slow so you can stay functional, you know what happened last time.

 

 

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I am not at all happy with my current psychiatrist.  I am on a wait list for a different one.

 

Regarding Mirtazapine, I took it for a month last March and then stopped in April.  And now I just started it back up this week.  I am wondering if I should have my psychiatrist switch me over Fluvoxamine (Luvox).  I have a lot of experience with Luvox and I had zero withdrawal symptoms when I went off it.  I can't see how I am going to get off the Ativan without some kind of anti-depressant/mood-stabilizer.

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Sometimes its better to stick with what you know as far as medications go, but even taking something to help, you'll likely still face challenges, we haven't found anything that universally helps.  What works for some won't work for others, it's all experimentation with you as the subject unfortunately.

 

Are you going to hold this dose in hopes you can stabilize?

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I think my psychiatrist wants me to increase my dose of Ativan. 

 

In my gut I want to stay at .25 twice a day even though I am feeling like I am going crazy in the mornings/early afternoons and spend the rest of the day dreading the next morning. 

 

This morning seems particularly bad.  I'm feeling pretty my hopeless. 

 

Yesterday my psychiatrist increased my Mirtazapine to 30 MG and said I could begin another Ativan taper in about 3 weeks when the Mirtazapine is more built up in my system. 

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I've read so many members say they wish they would have followed their gut instead of listening to someone else and even though I feel you went back on a dose that was too low after your rapid taper, I wonder if you should follow yours?

 

I don't know the benefits of Mirtazapine but know it's not a magic pill that takes away our suffering, nothing can do that but I do I agree with your doctor that waiting before resuming your taper is a good idea.  The fact that your evenings aren't as bad as your mornings is a good sign so maybe you can get by on this dose of .50 a day.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Update:  I have a new psychiatrist who specializes in addiction and I have high hopes. 

 

She prescribed me 300 MG of Gabapentin 3 to 4 times a day.  Also, she said I should start substituting the .25 MG of Ativan that I am taking when I wake up in the middle of night with a Gabapentin.  So that will mean that I will be down to only taking just .25 MG Ativan a day in the morning when I get out of bed.

 

My insomnia and morning/early afternoon anxiety and depression have been pretty terrible, so I am hoping this will work.  Right now, I am feeling pretty good.  I took my first Gabapentin a few hours ago.

 

 

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Skyblue,

 

I am sorry you are struggling.

 

Question: You're not taking both the gabapentin and the mirtazapine, right? I would suggest only trying one at a time to see if it offers relief, and stay on the lowest dose you can because they both have significant side effects and can be hard to come off.

 

Drinking alcohol while going through this can also make things much worse in the long term. Please be careful. It's very hard when you first hit acute withdrawal to think long term at all, but you have to try to make decisions right now with your long term brain health in mind. Again, it's very hard to do that!

 

I hope you stabilize soon and are able to do a taper that feels more stable and less dramatic than all this. Good luck and you're in the right place. Pamster is a wonderful support and the folks here can help you with your taper plan.

 

Openroad

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I have been taking the Mirtazapine for almost 3 weeks at bedtime and my new psychiatrist told me to continue to take it. 

 

She also told me to stop drinking alcohol at least for the short term. So I didn't drink any alcohol yesterday.  It was pretty easy for me to stop drinking red wine.  She said it didn't need to be permanent.

 

So far the Gabapentin seems to be working. I slept pretty good last night and I am feeling relatively good this morning which is a huge switch.

 

AND I ONLY TOOK .25 ATIVAN THIS MORNING WHEN I WOKE UP.  I SKIPED MY USUAUL MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT .25 ATIVAN.

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I'm glad your doctor is aware of the effects of alcohol while we go through this, it works on the same receptors in the brain that benzo's do, this is why they give alcoholics Librium (a benzo) in detox, alcohol is sometimes referred to as liquid benzo's, so while you know the difference between the two, your brain can't distinguish.

 

Good to know you found a new doctor, and I hope you continue to feel better and better.  Please be aware that the Gabapentin will need to be tapered once you're off the Ativan and recovered from your use. 

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Thank you for advising me to not take the Zaleplon.  My new psychiatrist also told me to not take it.

 

I again slept through the night and did not need to take my usual .25 Ativan in the middle of night.  I woke up around 6 am feeling my withdrawal symptoms pretty bad.  I took a Gabapentin around 6:30 am and reluctantly took my usual .25 Ativan around 7:30 am.  Now that it is 8am I feel that the extreme anxiety/depression are greatly lessening.  Previously when I was taking the .25 Ativan in the middle of the night and the .25 in the morning it seemed to just barely reduce my withdrawal anxiety/depression. 

 

I am wondering if I should have taken a second Gabapentin instead of the .25 Ativan and tried a full day with without Ativan.

 

Anyway, I guess I should be happy that this will be the second day in which I cut my Ativan dose in half.

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I'm grateful your new doctor understands a little more than your last one and terrific to hear you slept through the night!  :thumbsup:

 

I'm concerned about you cutting your dose in half, this is far more than we recommend, and trying to eliminate 100% of your dose could cause some extreme symptoms.  Gabapentin can aid in withdrawal but it can't replace the Ativan.  What we like to see is gradual reductions because if symptoms get overwhelming members will add the benzo back in but once these symptoms start its tough to get them back under control so members will updose. 

 

It can take a few days for symptoms to fully reveal themselves so what you do today can show up in a few days but by that time its more difficult to pull them back. 

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I felt a little bit worse this morning than the last, but compared to previous mornings it was a great morning.  Thanks for the advise to not rush things.  I will definitely continue to take the .25 Ativan in the morning until my doctor advises otherwise.

 

I'm probably under medicated as far as the Gabapentin now that i think about it.  My psychiatrist told me to replace the .25 Ativan in the middle of the night with a fourth Gabapentin because the .25 Ativan was not helping me get back to sleep.  But because I have been sleeping through the night since starting Gabapentin, I have stuck to taking only three.  One when I wake up, one around 10 am, and one around 10 PM. 

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If you can get by on less Gabapentin that's a good thing, less to taper later.

 

It's rare for someone around here to feel great in the morning, I realize you're speaking comparatively but its still nice to see.  :thumbsup:

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