Author Topic: 10 years today  (Read 600 times)

[Buddie]

10 years today
« on: April 08, 2022, 10:04:14 pm »
Hello, dear Benzo Buddies. I know what you are going through if you are beginning the recovery of your life. Ten years ago today, I took my last dose of a benzo. It was a combination of a long effort to use the Ashton Manual, which I did, and a final jump to getting off entirely as I reached a lower dose. I am 80 years old this year, and I got off right before I turned 70. I was one benzos for five years-the worst years of my life. Age did not matter to me because I wanted my remaining years to be good ones, and they are. The first couple of years I had waves and windows, but also got a clear understanding that I could to this. It was the hardest thing I have ever done, and the most rewarding challenge ever. Here is what I experienced in the beginning-although now I have to rely on memory not misery. I had insomnia, burning and itching all over, intrusive thoughts, severe anemia, often felt disconnected from what was going on around me, among other sxs. During these months the windows got longer and the waves shorter. I was working, which helped distract me. I also depended on a lot of exercise-working out in the gym, swimming, and a lot of walking. Exercise gave me a lift and a better perspective. During the second year, I got an opportunity to teach in another country, and I did that. During this time (18-two years) I got better and better. Year three was a year of almost total healing. Still had some bad days that were reminiscent of withdrawal, but very few.  I am still working at a local university, and love my work. I was physically strong during the years of benzos and early recovery, so my journey was lighter than some of you who are ground down physically. You will get better. Stick with BB to help you over difficult periods, work with a practitioner if you are under medical care, and know that NOBODY UNDERSTANDS YOUR MISERY EXCEPT OTHERS WHO HAVE EXPERIENCED IT. People are wonderfully sympathetic, but unless they have been here-they do not get it. It was better for me if I stopped hoping people would understand this particular misery. It spared them my horror, and also prepared me for not having to talk about it when IT was over. IT is over. I wish all of you the very, very best on this difficult but infinitely rewarding path. You will be rewarded with your life.
« Last Edit: April 08, 2022, 10:13:56 pm by [Buddie] »
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: 10 years today
« Reply #1 on: April 09, 2022, 06:40:27 am »
Wow it's all i can say. I wish God gives you the best.
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: 10 years today
« Reply #2 on: April 09, 2022, 09:45:04 am »
Thank you for posting!  It is great to read success stories and makes me want to hang in there and get over this journey.

It sounds like you are living a wonderful life at 80 :)
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: 10 years today
« Reply #3 on: April 09, 2022, 11:57:36 pm »
You're incredible [...], you have such strength and determination, thank you for giving hope to our older members who wonder if it's worth it, you make the case that it is!  :thumbsup: :smitten:
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: 10 years today
« Reply #4 on: April 11, 2022, 05:24:52 am »
Incredible! You sound like one amazing woman!
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: 10 years today
« Reply #5 on: April 12, 2022, 04:20:00 pm »
Jennie....  as I read your post my first thought was that I could return here at 80 and post my recovery story... our histories have a lot in common.  Even tho I'm in the thick of recovery, the thing that saves me most days is my physicality.  As long as I don't overdo it!    I'm now 68 and have just come thru almost 4 years of tapering....  after 20 years of benzo use.     It's so good to hear that there is life... rich life... at 80, after so much time (and misery has been commandeered by benzos) ... Thank you and bless you....
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: 10 years today
« Reply #6 on: April 14, 2022, 04:53:04 pm »
Thank you for coming back and sharing your story!
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: 10 years today
« Reply #7 on: April 20, 2022, 02:34:50 am »
your post made my heart smile :smitten:
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: 10 years today
« Reply #8 on: April 22, 2022, 05:44:55 am »
Ty so much for your story. It's very uplifting and just what I needed to hear. I'm now 62 and took my last tapered dose 35 days ago after 4 years 11 months of tapering. I too started out in good physical health, but the years of severe WDs have taken their toll. Even so, I feel a new positivity. I feel free, like a weight has been lifted from me. Even though I feel much better, I'm still experiencing some peaks and valleys of WD symptoms, though it's not even near as bad as it was in the past. It's nice to hear that they get better. Congratulations and ty for your wonderful post!

Oh, btw, I'm curious to know if you've had surgery. I'm going to need surgery, and I'm very worried that the anesthesia will get me addicted again, and I'll have to go through this again. I'm honestly not sure I can do this a 4th time. (1x off Xanax and 2x off Clonazepam). If you had surgery, did they use different anesthesia or something along those lines?
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.