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11 month


[Le...]

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I am in a wave now. Last 2 weeks were bad, emotional blunting, depression, anxiety. I don't feel nothing mostly and when i feel i feel sadness, i see people and feel sorry for them, if someone is suffering even if i don't know him i feel so bad so sorry. I remember in the past sadness was not like this now, was more melancholic with feelings but now is different more empty. I made some eye checking, everything was fine. I have changed my diet no processed food only organic if i find but nothing changed. I sleep 4-5 hours. I didn't know there is this kind of suffering. It this pass, yes sure.
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I'm almost 11 months off, (Jumped May 4th last year) from my 1051 day taper, of 1.5 mg of Klonopin, and I'm also in a severe wave, or something like it,  just unreal,  trying to get through it, tons of symptoms  , hope it passes for you ..
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A milestone for sure but still plenty of suffering going on, I'm so sorry Leoninano.  I know the sadness is unbearable but I'm amazed you can feel it for others, when I was where you are I couldn't feel anything for others, but even being able to do that I can see it's not true empathy since it feels empty.

 

I hated not being able to feel, to connect with myself or others but it comes back, it really does.  :smitten:

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Thank you Pamster, as you i really hate to not being able to feel, but it's nice to think that it comes back. It's Ramadan and i am fasting, from moment to moment the symptoms change from panic to nearly 90 % ok, from deep emptiness to joy. My sleep is poor. My vision is better, memory little better, thinking of doing some ice baths and breathing exercises.
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It sounds like your symptoms are all over the place, these extremes are rough to deal with aren't they?  Did you do the ice bath, that sounds like torture to me?  Did you notice any difference in how you felt when fasting, I've read some members say it helped them.
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Yes Pamster the extremes are really hard, but to be honest not as bad as before. I have moments that it feels out of control, moments of deep sadness but they come and go. Cold bath it's a torture in the beginning but later i feel better but only for some hours, for some days i will not do it again bc i have flu. Yesterday i was nearly in full blown panic attack, was like as it started 2 years ago, but i did some breathing exercises and it did the trick no panic attack, felt lightheaded but better, for about 2 hours the symptoms of starting panic attack came and gone. I took some vitamin c supplement a day before bc i have flu or omicron i don't know and i think that triggered. I think fasting make me feel better. After Ramadan i am thinking of doing prolonged dry fasting, maybe 3-5 days. I have read that helps with food sensitivities, and detox of the body. Till i heal i will not stop trying to find ways to reduce the symptoms.
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