8 Months and feeling positive

8 months out from 2 weeks of heavy abuse. Wow! This last 8 months has easily been the worst of my life. And as an experience has been like nothing else. It's a blur in many ways, though during the suffering, god knows how it dragged.

 

Since the 14th of December I have only had 5 days of waves. Only 3 of those were really, really tough. I've had a handful of days that weren't waves but were anxious. Physical symptoms are gone, minis tinnitus.

 

It's just a little bit of anxiety/anxiety proneness now.

 

I have flu or covid (tested negative on latera flow but I know omicron often doesn't show) and that seems to have revved my anxiety just a tad. Hoping I don't go into a wave.

 

But, even if I do, as I say, the last one only lasted 3-5 days. Hopefully this time it is the same or shorter. I'm starting to really believe I will see the other side of this one day.

Congrats HS.  What a milestone.  So glad to see you have come so far!

You sound hopeful, its so good to see you having good days, I'm sorry to hear you're sick right now, I hope it'll be short in duration and light on symptoms.

Thanks guys. Honestly, life has been mostly pleasurable.

 

Don't get me wrong, I experience some sort of mild anxiety every day. But every day I also experience legitimate enjoyment, interest in many different things, enjoyable interactions with people. I'm seeing friends, reading, writing, watching movies, cooking a lot, playing my guitar. I could live like this.

 

The only downsides really are the worries when I do feel anxiety, that it is the harbinger of a wave. If I could get rid of that, that'd be huge.

 

I also rarely talk about my symptoms anymore. Of course if I have a wave, that will increase for a little while. But otherwise, I think about it less than I did, and I talk about it even less.

 

I've been trying not to put timeframes on things. But at 8 months, feeling the way I am, I'm really looking forward to seeing how I am at 12 months.