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End of Taper tonight


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Greetings, my fellow warriors!

 

Tonight marks the end of 18 months of taper and the beginning of recovery. I have been on benzo for several years for backache and related stress. It was helpful for a few months, but then things went downhill. I developed symptoms I didn't have before ( familiar?) benzos, such as severe anxiety, rage, depression, and poor decision-making. I didn't know what was wrong with me, so I went from doctor to doctor ( the beginning of my nightmare) to figure out what was happening to me, but they only threw more prescriptions at me and blamed everything but benzo. Like many of you, I believed them and followed their advice until two years ago when I had enough of it. I stumbled on this site while searching for clues, and here I found all the answers. Thank God. What a relief that was.

 

Anyway, the last 18 months have been hellish. Most of you know this from experience. But in addition to the severe withdrawal, my wife and I had a premature babe with many health challenges, including a cancer diagnosis which exacerbated my condition. But I continued with my taper plan since halting wouldn't make life any easier.

 

The hardest part of all this is not what benzo has done to me but my young family. My wife of 3 years had enough of me. She wants to leave me. Yes. All she has known is me, the benzo victim. She no longer sees the light at the end of the tunnel. She believes I am this asshole because I chose to be or I am crazy. I pleaded with her to give me a few more months, and things will get better, but she is not yet convinced. I don't blame her. She has been through a lot, and I am no help.

 

Despite all of this, I am still celebrating this night because it is a milestone for me, and I know things will get better eventually. Never give up hope and march forward. I guess that is my message here.

 

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  Sorry you've had it so hard on top of getting off this drug  :hug: I have a lot of adversity and lost my  long term partner due to benzos and the withdrawal and am still tapering  too, I feel for you :hug::therethere::highfive:

 

Well done for getting to the other side against such hard times happing to you, I would celebrate that too.  :mybuddy: I hope things now begin to turn around for you for the better my friend  .

 

                                                    Love Nova xxx :smitten:

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Congratulations on being done with the taper!

Onward and upward! Sorry to hear about all the trials during your taper. It’s so hard to do.

You’ve truly accomplished something great!

Let the healing begin ❤️

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Congratulations on getting off of the poison, now let the healing begin

 

I can totally relate to how Benzos can destroy your family.  I had a pretty similar reaction where my wife accused me of "faking" my symptoms for attention.  Then at one point my mother-in-law tried to convince some of my brothers to get me committed to a psych ward.  After I completely recovered, they realized how wrong they were but never apologized for anything they said or did while I was in WD.  It was played out that they suffered more than I did, which was certainly not true, but as you said, who can blame them?  Unless people experience Benzo WD, they will never fully understand it.

 

Good luck!

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