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4 Years Off Benzos This Month


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I wanted to post here to give a little encouragement today. This March, I am four years off Klonopin, in which I quit cold turkey. What ensued was the most miserable 2.5 years of my life. Severe chemical depression, suicidal ideation and homicidal ideation from the mental akathisia that could only be mildly controlled by walking constantly, insomnia that made life a nightmare, derealization, blurred vision, nerve burning all over my body, anhedonia, chemical anxiety, paranoia, being scared and sensitive to every television show or book or movie, amongst other horrors.

 

At about 30 months, I started noticing some minor improvements, especially after working out. From months 30-36, I felt a great deal of improvement. Now at 48 months off, I feel even better than I did at 36 months off. There is hope for those people who quit cold turkey and for those who become protracted. Just keep getting by day to day and the improvements will happen, even if at a glacial pace.

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Thank you so much for coming back to report in.  It gives me hope that even a protracted recovery is possible...  I'm so glad for you...
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  • 3 weeks later...

Hey Boomboxboy,

 

It's so good to see you write this post.  I remember calling you a few times on the phone and sending you a bunch of PMs way back when you were only about 10 months into this journey.  You thought (as most do) that something else was wrong with you and it wasn't just the Benzos causing your symptoms and issues.  You've come a long way.  Yes, there is hope, there is healing.  Time is the healer!

 

Continue to enjoy your Benzo free life to the fullest!

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hey boom,

 

i think i read that you were dealing with pssd like symptoms, have these resolved? how is your anhedonia?

 

The sexual side effects seem to be slowly improving but I still get some stretches of days with very low sex drive. But it does seem to be improving. The anhedonia is much better.

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The sexual side effects seem to be slowly improving but I still get some stretches of days with very low sex drive. But it does seem to be improving. The anhedonia is much better.

 

thanks for the response. how far out were you when you began to notice improvement with these symptoms?

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The anhedonia started to improve slowly between 2-3 years. I don't remember the exact timeline. But by three years off, my interests had mostly come back.
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  • 4 weeks later...
This post gives me hope. I was cold turkeyed off of klonopin and an opioid and have had severe anhedonia for 14 months now. It's excruciating. But knowing you had it for as long as you did gives me hope that I might see a shift eventually. Thank you for sharing this. I really needed to hear this.
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The anhedonia will get better in time. For me, I started noticing some let up in my core symptoms from months 30-36. Things have continued to improve up till now and I'm now 49 months off.
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  • 2 weeks later...
I've read your story before and it reminds me a lot of my story. I used benzo's on and off a long time before problems started. That's why I didn't recognise withdrawal. I also did a CT. So good to hear you are healing. Gives me hope I can one day be myself again! Keep on rockin'!
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Yes, I was off and on them for years without any really noticeable problems. Nothing that was really affecting me day to day anyway. But I'm realizing now that some of even the subtle things I was going through way back then were probably some minor withdrawal symptoms. Paranoia. Mood Swings. A few others as well. But the real hell didn't start till after I was off them for about two years and went back on for about 3 months. That's when they got me. What symptoms are you dealing with now and how long have you been off?
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Yes, that sound familiar. I also had light withdrawal in between periods of more intense use and I had interdose withdrawal, but never recognised it. I am off almost 13 months now and my cns is still very sensitive. I switched to an AD (for the third time) and tapered some, but it's really hard to taper. My system is still so sensitive.
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  • 1 month later...
I'm not sure if this question is for me, but I'm 15 months off and doing better. It takes a long time to fully heal, but I feel I am functional again.
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I'm not sure if this question is for me, but I'm 15 months off and doing better. It takes a long time to fully heal, but I feel I am functional again.

 

No it's for @boomboxboy21. But congrats anyway.

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Experiment1996, I'm still doing pretty good. No real issues at this point besides figuring out what I am and am not sensitive to. It seems like I'm still very sensitive to stuff. Tried alcohol way last October (43 months off) and had a bad month so I can't drink alcohol anymore or for the time being. It seems I can tolerate coffee again but it does make it so I can't take a nap so I've basically cut that out too. Overall, still doing pretty good.
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  • 7 months later...

Experiment1996, I'm still doing pretty good. No real issues at this point besides figuring out what I am and am not sensitive to. It seems like I'm still very sensitive to stuff. Tried alcohol way last October (43 months off) and had a bad month so I can't drink alcohol anymore or for the time being. It seems I can tolerate coffee again but it does make it so I can't take a nap so I've basically cut that out too. Overall, still doing pretty good.

 

I think many would be happy to see a new post from you. I think you have reached 5 years.

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Hey boomer,

 

I too am four years in about two weeks. I used to login to to Benzobuddies. I did the taper, I can't image doing a cold Turkey. so glad to hear you are well. We have traded comments before, I remember some of your story.

 

I plan on doing my FOUR YEAR post soon.....

 

take care out there, it does get better.

 

Ron

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Thanks, J. Congrats on four years and feeling better. I don't really remember when we talked though.

 

I am about two weeks away from my five-year anniversary and doing pretty well. Just always sick with colds and stuff because of my kids but nothing as bad as benzo withdrawal. I was actually planning to post something when I was five years off.

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