Who Is In My Brain?

I was prescribed liquid Benadryl as a child for 'temper-tantrums'. Throughout my lifetime I've struggled with fears, panic, and anxiety. I'm using a prescribed 3mg per day dose of Lorazepam these days along with some other psychiatric medications.

 

I feel confused and somewhat ashamed about being on medication ostensibly for my mental health. I suffer desperately when I run out or pridefully try to stop. People talk about brain chemistry. I don't know... I feel like a caged animal most of the time.

Hello Born Never Asked, welcome to BenzoBuddies,

 

Are you interested in knowing how to discontinue the Lorazepam, we can help you figure out a taper plan.  Do you suffer any symptoms when you run out of Lorazepam, this might indicate your body is dependent on it.

 

I'll provide some links to get you started on the forum but please ask questions, we're here to help.

 

Pamster

 

The Ashton Manual

 

Planning Your Withdrawal (Taper)

 

Withdrawal Support (during your taper)

 

What you describe is how I felt when I was on Klonopin after a few months. I hope you decide to come off this medication b/c life gets a lot better after this stuff is out of your system. The ride down can be bumpy and sometimes scarier than you could imagine, but others are able to walk off relatively unscathed. You may be one of these people.

 

Definitely let us know how we can help. There is a lot to read on this site. I would start in the "repository" section and read what these drugs do to your brain. It helps

 

Welcome!

Hello Born,

I'm amazed that my mental health symptoms are so much better off these meds. Physical ones too. It really makes me wonder. I have days and moments---issues that upset me, deep feelings that are hard sometimes. But overall I feel well the majority of the time.

 

Tapering and stopping these meds is the best thing I ever did! Life is still challenging.

 

I hope you'll find your way to feeling better. Find a thread/support group here you identify with and be a part of it. I did and it helped me a lot!

 

Wish you well,

KB

Thanks to those who acknowledged my introduction. I am still at 3 mg. Lorazepam per day. I take Remeron as prescribed. I finally found a psychotherapist certified in EMDR. We begin June 15, 2022. I have taken it upon myself to manage a reduction of my other two big meds. Most days, I take 0 to 15 mgs. of my 30 mg. dose of Adderall, sometimes a whole 30 mg. capsule but not often. The other big one is Ketamine which is prescribed to me as a nasal spray. I have taken it upon myself to manage a reduction of that by splitting the one nasal sprayer into two sprayers, and adding distilled water to top off each bottle. I am doing this as of June 6, 2022.

 

I feel moments of urgency or peril and I quietly sob quite a bit. staying away from a couple unhealthy people is difficult because I love them. I'm 62. I try to bolster my confidence in this turbulence but my lifetime accomplishments seem damaged or false.

I'm concerned about you starting your Lorazepam taper while tapering other medications, it will be difficult to know what is causing what in case things get uncomfortable.  Is there any way you could either hold off on tapering these other meds or perhaps delay your taper that starts on the 15th?