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This is my fifth night on no pill.

I only slept for an hour.  I thought I would sleep 10 hours again because I slept 10 hours last night, but I can't sleep.

I slept better at my brother's.  I am afraid I will never sleep.

I am tempted to get pills tomorrow, but I know I will run out as he is reducing the dose once a week until he wants me to quit in 3 weeks.

 

 

 

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I didn’t sleep for several days at a time in the beginning. And even when I would sleep, it was only an hour or two a night. It was rough, but it passed. It’s not going to be easy. Nobody ever claimed it would be. Taking another dose is just going to prolong your healing process, but of course, you need to do what’s best for you, in your own way with this. I wish you the best of luck.
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The doctor said I would get seizures if I quit without tapering.  I never got seizures when I quit before.  I just can't hack the insomnia and panic attacks.
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I picked up my pills as I was panicking? But I don't want to take one.  He only gave me enough for two weeks then I no more.

I don't want to run out it two weeks and panic again without pills.

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Unfortunately, anxiety and insomnia are common symptoms WD and recovery. Most of us have experienced this. And probably side effects of your pills. So focus on one day at a time, better times are coming, and you don't have to focus on your pills all the time. They do more harm than good.  :)
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I picked up my pills as I was panicking? But I don't want to take one.  He only gave me enough for two weeks then I no more.

I don't want to run out it two weeks and panic again without pills.

 

Dom,

 

I don't know how to get my point across to you about what you're doing without offending you? 

 

It is highly NOT recommended to keep starting and stopping Benzos.  It could make WD symptoms worse and make your healing and recovery time longer?

 

If you don't have Benzos in the house, you won't be tempted to take them when you are mentally weak and not sleeping well or at all.

 

It's super easy to reach for a Benzo because you and most people on the planet have been conditioned to believe that you need 8 hours of sleep per night or you're going to die or something bad will happen to you.  That's simply NOT TRUE!  Short-term (a few months to a few years) of Benzo-induced insomnia WILL NOT kill you.  In fact, I never got sick, not even one time when colds and the flu were going through the rest of my house and I was averaging 5-10 hours of sleep per WEEK!

 

Unfortunately there's no way around not getting hit with INSOMNIA and other SYMPTOMS for most people coming off of Benzos.  It's just what they do.  In very rare cases, I've seen people do really slow tapers over a year or two years or longer that only get mild symptoms as they taper, but those people are the exception, not the rule.

 

Not sleeping sucks big time, I've been there and done that, but the ONLY way OUT of the mess you are in is THROUGH the process of experiencing insomnia and symptoms.  There are NO shortcuts or "magic" potions to speed up the process.  TIME is the healer.

 

Dom, do yourself a favor and either stay with your CT or do a slow taper, but from what you said, your doctor won't give you enough Benzos to do a PROPER taper, so a CT is probably your only choice at this time?  And if you CT, you are going to have to deal with insomnia and symptoms.  Your focus needs to be on how you are going to "accept" this process instead of putting your faith in Benzos (pills) when you hit a rough patch and learning how NOT to panic when sleep does not come.  You can get past this.  I did and so did many others.  It was the hardest thing I've ever done in my life, but I am so thankful that I crossed the finish line many years ago and now I can live a "normal" life again and sleep on my own without "pills."  This could be you too!  :thumbsup:

 

Good luck!

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I picked up my pills as I was panicking? But I don't want to take one.  He only gave me enough for two weeks then I no more.

I don't want to run out it two weeks and panic again without pills.

 

Dom,

 

I don't know how to get my point across to you about what you're doing without offending you? 

 

It is highly NOT recommended to keep starting and stopping Benzos.  It could make WD symptoms worse and make your healing and recovery time longer?

 

If you don't have Benzos in the house, you won't be tempted to take them when you are mentally weak and not sleeping well or at all.

 

It's super easy to reach for a Benzo because you and most people on the planet have been conditioned to believe that you need 8 hours of sleep per night or you're going to die or something bad will

happen to you.  That's simply NOT TRUE!  Short-term (a few months to a few years) of Benzo-induced insomnia WILL NOT kill you.  In fact, I never got sick, not even one time when colds and the flu were going through the rest of my house and I was averaging 5-10 hours of sleep per WEEK!

 

Unfortunately there's no way around not getting hit with INSOMNIA and other SYMPTOMS for most people coming off of Benzos.  It's just what they do.  In very rare cases, I've seen people do really slow tapers over a year or two years or longer that only get mild symptoms as they taper, but those people are the exception, not the rule.

 

Not sleeping sucks big time, I've been there and done that, but the ONLY way OUT of the mess you are in is THROUGH the process of experiencing insomnia and symptoms.  There are NO shortcuts or "magic" potions to speed up the process.  TIME is the healer.

 

Dom, do yourself a favor and either stay with your CT or do a slow taper, but from what you said, your doctor won't give you enough Benzos to do a PROPER taper, so a CT is probably your only choice at this time?  And if you CT, you are going to have to deal with insomnia and symptoms.  Your focus needs to be on how you are going to "accept" this process instead of putting your faith in Benzos (pills) when you hit a rough patch and learning how NOT to panic when sleep does not come.  You can get past this.  I did and so did many others.  It was the hardest thing I've ever done in my life, but I am so thankful that I crossed the finish line many years ago and now I can live a "normal" life again and sleep on my own without "pills."  This could be you too!  :thumbsup:

 

Good luck!

 

Amen! It’s a tough road, but you can get there, Dom! It will NOT be easy, but it’s definitely going to be made a lot harder by reaching for the poison that is causing you to suffer.

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