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New here... Need resources in my state (VA) to begin a taper


[Jr...]

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Hello all,

 

I desperately want to become benzo-free.  My issue is finding a doctor or psychiatrist to work with me and prescribe Librium or Valium to taper.  I was originally prescribed Xanax 6 years ago, and that doctor poorly managed my case entirely.  I was diagnosed with PTSD and GAD, with occasional panic attacks years before starting treatment with alprazolam.  I had tried many SSRIs and other meds prior, prozac along with many others seemed to work ok but would start causing more anxiety after a month or two. Dose changes, mainly increases, made it worse. So eventually a doctor put me on Xanax. 0.5mg 3 times a day at first, but within two - three months had me up to 2mg 3 times a day.  After 8 months of this, he told me I could not get them anymore. I didn't abuse drugs, drink alcohol, or take any benzodiazepines of any sort before he started treatment.  I wasn't educated by him about withdrawals and told me I would be fine. Within two days I was in complete pandemonium.  I called and he with much attitude gave me a weeks worth of 0.5s to ease the symptoms, and said to break them in half the last two days.  Obviously as many of you know, that was pure negligence.  He wound up losing his practice a couple of months later, I'm pretty sure there was a lot going on behind the scenes.

 

Anyway.  There is a huge reluctance to prescribe benzos these days, and since then I've had months of being off and then having to get back on due to lasting symptoms.  I had no idea it was likely PAWS, but all I knew was my anxiety and strange symptoms showing up without warning for no reason that there was an immense issue that wasn't there prior. Again, wasn't using other substances. 

 

 

Fast forward to now, the longest I've made it is 6 months.  I need help finding a doctor in VA that would work with me and not view me as a drug addict and do a long taper. I don't have the resources to keep going to doctor after doctor and psychiatrist after psychiatrist telling me I'm an addict and to go to rehab.  I've tried detox, and we all know it doesn't work.  A long taper is what's needed initially, and after the taper I'd be more than willing to try a 30 day inpatient rehab to further aid my success.

 

So my plan of attack is to find a doctor willing to help.  I have VA Medicaid, and a lot of the doctors/psychs out of pocket and I don't have the money to continue this.  So any help to point me in the right direction would be hugely appreciated.  my primary care whom I've known since I was 13 (I'm 31) won't even help and is against benzos in every sense.  So DM me if you have any advice or could point me in the right direction to a psych or doc that would be willing to help me through this. I want to move on with my life.  Thank you so much in advance.

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Even a clonopin taper would work... I need to stabilize at minimum.  I wish I had investigated before ever taking the meds, but was told and am still being told by a number of doctors that it can't be benzo withdrawal after 6 months.  I'm sure this has been experienced by nearly everyone on here.  Of course all my weird perception and cognitive issues disappear once I take something after months of complete abstinence.  So please, any help would be appreciated.
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