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Should I be worried just need some advice


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Hi guys x

 

I’m going thru another hellish patch, the kind where I don’t know if I’m asleep but if I do it’s maybe an hr or 2 so light it feels like nothing.

 

My question is, most days I function pretty well. I’m exhausted, my body hurts, my eyes sting so bad. My chest hurts. Really bad benzo belly. But I’m ok apart from that.I go to work, I’m quick witted, I’m not anxious really just maybe a tiny bit from lack of sleep.

 

I feel like I should feel worse than I do. Maybe I’m learning to cope better with it. I don’t know. What do u think. Sometimes it scares me how functional I am without sleep (even tho I still get quite teary because I miss it so much)

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Hesitant to post bc you are such a warrior and what could I offer ? I truly believe you are healing to one hundred percent. Yes, you are coping better but I don’t think you should feel worse. S*** , you’ve been through worst than this , at least that’s What I tell myself on particularly hard days. Like today for me and it helped.

 

Christmas is coming and I hope you get your wish !

 

 

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Hi Shayna - there are many nights when I am very restless and I can't believe I've slept at all, but obviously I do.  You probably get numerous micro sleeps that add up to a decent rest.  Our bodies are incredibly resilient.

 

I believe that in due time you'll start sleeping more deeply and consistently. 

 

Christmastime is very stressful even if we love it all.  So much to do, little down-time, all sorts of dietary changes....

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Hesitant to post bc you are such a warrior and what could I offer ? I truly believe you are healing to one hundred percent. Yes, you are coping better but I don’t think you should feel worse. S*** , you’ve been through worst than this , at least that’s What I tell myself on particularly hard days. Like today for me and it helped.

 

Christmas is coming and I hope you get your wish !

 

Thanks kanoba x honestly if it wasn’t for the insomnia which I’m sure is responsible for all my other symptoms I’d say I was healed.

 

I’m sorry ur having a bad day too. It’s so frustrating isn’t it. I feel a bit like a yo yo lately!

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you are my hero, keep up the amazing work, im going on 8 days of maybe 8 hours, im with ya <3

 

And you are mine buddie. Far out one day, I hope I get to sit with u and just exhale. What a ride. Jesus…. 8 hrs. I’ve had a couple of 7 hr weeks. That shit hurts x

 

Well, it’ll have to kill us won’t it. Xx

 

 

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Hi Shayna - there are many nights when I am very restless and I can't believe I've slept at all, but obviously I do.  You probably get numerous micro sleeps that add up to a decent rest.  Our bodies are incredibly resilient.

 

I believe that in due time you'll start sleeping more deeply and consistently. 

 

Christmastime is very stressful even if we love it all.  So much to do, little down-time, all sorts of dietary changes....

 

Thanks dee x sometimes I think maybe I just try to do too much, but when I don’t do anything it’s just as bad. Get busy living or get busy dying x

 

U tried chamomile again yet dee?

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Shayna,

 

You are doing great considering all things.  I wouldn't worry about not feeling "worse" than you think you should.  I did the exact same thing.  After a night or two or 3 of no perceived sleep, I convinced myself that I should feel like total crap.  Why is that?  We are conditioned to believe that if we don't get X amount of sleep every night, something bad will happen and we will feel like $hit!

 

That's simply not true and you, me and many others are living proof of that.  In fact, now when I have an off night and only get an hour or two of sleep, I usually feel OK the next day.  I'm tired but it's a different kind of tired than what I went through during WD.

 

Sleep will return for you too!  Unfortunately it will happen in it's own time.  Remember that your brain/body will get all the sleep they need before anything bad can happen to you.  Microsleep and whatever amount you get each night is enough at this time, but more will definitely come later (and when you need it).

 

Merry Christmas and keep living your life to the fullest.  You're in control, not the insomnia!  :thumbsup:

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Hi Shayna - there are many nights when I am very restless and I can't believe I've slept at all, but obviously I do.  You probably get numerous micro sleeps that add up to a decent rest.  Our bodies are incredibly resilient.

 

I believe that in due time you'll start sleeping more deeply and consistently. 

 

Christmastime is very stressful even if we love it all.  So much to do, little down-time, all sorts of dietary changes....

 

Thanks dee x sometimes I think maybe I just try to do too much, but when I don’t do anything it’s just as bad. Get busy living or get busy dying x

 

U tried chamomile again yet dee?

 

Shay you are so right - trying to do too much is always a trigger yet when I sit around for more than a day it bites me in the arse too!  It's this threading the needle that is so difficult.

 

I have been apprehensive to try the chamomile tea again just yet.  With all going on this month I think it is pushing too much.  I'm gonna wait until mid January when all is calm down and I'm hanging in a good baseline to do my experiment.  Besides, I've just develop gut issues/cramping that I need to figure out.  Seems like a shift in new symptoms.

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Shayna,

 

You are doing great considering all things.  I wouldn't worry about not feeling "worse" than you think you should.  I did the exact same thing.  After a night or two or 3 of no perceived sleep, I convinced myself that I should feel like total crap.  Why is that?  We are conditioned to believe that if we don't get X amount of sleep every night, something bad will happen and we will feel like $hit!

 

That's simply not true and you, me and many others are living proof of that.  In fact, now when I have an off night and only get an hour or two of sleep, I usually feel OK the next day.  I'm tired but it's a different kind of tired than what I went through during WD.

 

Sleep will return for you too!  Unfortunately it will happen in it's own time.  Remember that your brain/body will get all the sleep they need before anything bad can happen to you.  Microsleep and whatever amount you get each night is enough at this time, but more will definitely come later (and when you need it).

 

Merry Christmas and keep living your life to the fullest.  You're in control, not the insomnia!  :thumbsup:

 

Thanks the way. Yeah it gets scary because u think whats wrong with me. Someone told me at work yesterday not to lose sleep over something that happened. I just laughed and said never. God if they only knew.

 

I slept 5 hrs last night. God I’m so greatful for it. My body was hurting so bad. I went to bed at 7pm The last few weeks it’s like I get 3 nights of 2-3 hrs, 1 night of 4-6 then the others are 0-2. So hard but it’s been worse and I got thru that.

 

Thanku the way x always great to hear from u x merry Christmas!

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Hi Shayna - there are many nights when I am very restless and I can't believe I've slept at all, but obviously I do.  You probably get numerous micro sleeps that add up to a decent rest.  Our bodies are incredibly resilient.

 

I believe that in due time you'll start sleeping more deeply and consistently. 

 

Christmastime is very stressful even if we love it all.  So much to do, little down-time, all sorts of dietary changes....

 

Thanks dee x sometimes I think maybe I just try to do too much, but when I don’t do anything it’s just as bad. Get busy living or get busy dying x

 

U tried chamomile again yet dee?

 

Shay you are so right - trying to do too much is always a trigger yet when I sit around for more than a day it bites me in the arse too!  It's this threading the needle that is so difficult.

 

I have been apprehensive to try the chamomile tea again just yet.  With all going on this month I think it is pushing too much.  I'm gonna wait until mid January when all is calm down and I'm hanging in a good baseline to do my experiment.  Besides, I've just develop gut issues/cramping that I need to figure out.  Seems like a shift in new symptoms.

 

Sounds like a good plan dee x oh the gut stuff is awful. Mine has been going about a month now really bad. I hope it ends soon.

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Maybe this will help?  Maybe not?

 

My sleep log from Jan. & Feb. 2017 is below---as you and others can see, my sleep was all over the map and this was months 5 to late 6 after my CT (and these were estimated hours that I came up with, I did not use a sleep tracker).  Also, all of the sleep below was broken sleep. I just stopped putting broken after each night it in my log/journal.

 

January 9 - 3.5 to 5 hours broken

January 10 - 3 hours broken

January 11 - 3 hours broken

January 12 - 0

January 13 - 3-5 broken

January 14 - 0

January 15 - 5-6 hours broken

January 16 - 0 - .5

January 17 - 3-4 broken

January 18 - 5-6 hours broken

January 19 - 2 hours

January 20 - 5-6 hours broken

January 21 - 3-4 hours broken

January 22 – 2 – 3 hours broken

January 23 – 3-4 hours

January 24 – 5-6 hours

January 25 – 1 hour  (high Anxiety)

January 26 4-5 hours

January 27 0

January 28 - 4-5 hours

January 29 - 2 hours

January 30 – 2-3 hours

January 31 3-4 hours

February 1 6-7 hours

February 2 2-3 hours

February 3 6-7 hours

February 4 2-3 hours

February 5 .5 – 1 hour

February 6 5 hours

February 7 1 hour

February 8 4 hours

February 9 4 hours

February 10 2 hours

February 11 6 hours

February 12 1 hour

February 13 6 hours

February 14 6-7 hours

February 15 1 hour

February 16 4.5 hours

Feb. 17 1 hour

Feb. 18 5 hours

Feb. 19 3 hours

Feb. 20 0 hours

Feb. 21 2 hours

Feb. 22 5 hours

Feb. 23 4 hours

Feb. 24 1 hour

Feb. 25 6 hours

Feb. 26 2 hours

Feb. 27 0 hours

Feb. 28 5-6 hours

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Maybe this will help?  Maybe not?

 

My sleep log from Jan. & Feb. 2017 is below---as you and others can see, my sleep was all over the map and this was months 5 to late 6 after my CT (and these were estimated hours that I came up with, I did not use a sleep tracker).  Also, all of the sleep below was broken sleep. I just stopped putting broken after each night it in my log/journal.

 

January 9 - 3.5 to 5 hours broken

January 10 - 3 hours broken

January 11 - 3 hours broken

January 12 - 0

January 13 - 3-5 broken

January 14 - 0

January 15 - 5-6 hours broken

January 16 - 0 - .5

January 17 - 3-4 broken

January 18 - 5-6 hours broken

January 19 - 2 hours

January 20 - 5-6 hours broken

January 21 - 3-4 hours broken

January 22 – 2 – 3 hours broken

January 23 – 3-4 hours

January 24 – 5-6 hours

January 25 – 1 hour  (high Anxiety)

January 26 4-5 hours

January 27 0

January 28 - 4-5 hours

January 29 - 2 hours

January 30 – 2-3 hours

January 31 3-4 hours

February 1 6-7 hours

February 2 2-3 hours

February 3 6-7 hours

February 4 2-3 hours

February 5 .5 – 1 hour

February 6 5 hours

February 7 1 hour

February 8 4 hours

February 9 4 hours

February 10 2 hours

February 11 6 hours

February 12 1 hour

February 13 6 hours

February 14 6-7 hours

February 15 1 hour

February 16 4.5 hours

Feb. 17 1 hour

Feb. 18 5 hours

Feb. 19 3 hours

Feb. 20 0 hours

Feb. 21 2 hours

Feb. 22 5 hours

Feb. 23 4 hours

Feb. 24 1 hour

Feb. 25 6 hours

Feb. 26 2 hours

Feb. 27 0 hours

Feb. 28 5-6 hours

 

That is helpful x thanks so much for sharing it. Mine is just like that except not as many 4+ nights. I feel pretty rough today considering I had a better night. Heart been bad today.

 

My sleep is always in a block. I very very rarely fall back asleep after I wake up. It’s like my body goes .. yep we’re good. Ugh

 

 

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I'm so sorry Shayna!  Sleep loss is so brutal.  I'm in an insomnia wave right now after thinking I was not going to have to go through too much more of it.  It's so upsetting.  And my stomach feels like I swallowed battery acid.  It's always worse if I don't sleep.  I guess it was wishful thinking to believe the insomnia was behind me.  Actually, even on nights I considered "good", my sleep was always very broken, sweaty, and infested with nightmares.  Even so, I would take that back gladly! 
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Thank you for this thread...  TheWay...  thank you for the sleep log.  And all the information. 

You sleep log pattern is identical to mine. 

 

This is one looong torturous night with all the Xmas stress looming.  I've had zero sleep.  Again.  I seem to be in a hellish wave lately.  My stomach burns, my sinuses are plugged, and my 'acceptance' got up and left.

 

I  needed to hear the timelines for sleep healing and all of it really.  :smitten:

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I'm so sorry Shayna!  Sleep loss is so brutal.  I'm in an insomnia wave right now after thinking I was not going to have to go through too much more of it.  It's so upsetting.  And my stomach feels like I swallowed battery acid.  It's always worse if I don't sleep.  I guess it was wishful thinking to believe the insomnia was behind me.  Actually, even on nights I considered "good", my sleep was always very broken, sweaty, and infested with nightmares.  Even so, I would take that back gladly!

 

Yep. It’s rough. I might have had 2 hrs broken last night. I’m so tired of feeling exhausted all the time

 

So sorry ur struggling again. Do u still have covid stuff going on?

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Thank you for this thread...  TheWay...  thank you for the sleep log.  And all the information. 

You sleep log pattern is identical to mine. 

 

This is one looong torturous night with all the Xmas stress looming.  I've had zero sleep.  Again.  I seem to be in a hellish wave lately.  My stomach burns, my sinuses are plugged, and my 'acceptance' got up and left.

 

I  needed to hear the timelines for sleep healing and all of it really.  :smitten:

 

I feel you honey. U aren’t alone. It’s very difficult but we must endure it x

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I'm so sorry Shayna!  Sleep loss is so brutal.  I'm in an insomnia wave right now after thinking I was not going to have to go through too much more of it.  It's so upsetting.  And my stomach feels like I swallowed battery acid.  It's always worse if I don't sleep.  I guess it was wishful thinking to believe the insomnia was behind me.  Actually, even on nights I considered "good", my sleep was always very broken, sweaty, and infested with nightmares.  Even so, I would take that back gladly!

 

Yep. It’s rough. I might have had 2 hrs broken last night. I’m so tired of feeling exhausted all the time

 

So sorry ur struggling again. Do u still have covid stuff going on?

 

Yeah, I honestly think Covid damaged my nervous and digestive system. 

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