Tell me it's going to get better...

Hey guys,

 

I started my taper May 1st, 2021 and that was when I started getting 2 hours of sleep a night. I went 3 months getting 2 to 3 hours of sleep a night. Recently, I went back to the gym and got several nights of 5 to 7 hours of sleep and thought I was healing! My brain and body apparently got used to the workouts and now I am back down to 3 hours again.

 

I'm so bummed. I am one of those that takes a stack every night to help with sleep. I take 10mg melatonin, 10mg CBD and 50mg diphenhydramine.

 

I am afraid if I don't take anything, I won't sleep at all 

 

Tell me it's going to get better. I know healing isn't linear but I am so ready to be healed completely! Those 7 hour nights were heavenly.

 

Despondent that I am back to 3 hours a night, sometimes less.

 

HM

HM,

 

Sorry your sleep is so up and down and just plain old poor in general!

 

While you are still on (and even after you're off) sleep will most likely be poor until healing can kick in and things even out over time.

 

It takes time and more time for sleep to start to even out for most.  I know my sleep was actually better (1-3 hours per night) early on in my WD

 

My sleep got bad around month 3 and stayed that way until about month 10, then things started to get better and kept on improving after that

 

However, it was still very UP and down.  I'd do well for a week or even two, only to get hit by a zero night or a 1-2 hour nights...sometimes the poor nights would last a week or two after I thought I was healed! 

 

I went on a pattern of getting some sleep one night and then zero sleep the next night for months.

 

There's really no rhyme or reason to how things play out. 

 

I do know it's extremely frustrating and disheartening to get a few nights (or weeks) of decent sleep only to go back into a pattern of poor or no sleep for days or weeks.

 

But that's how it plays out for most.  After you are completely off, sleep returns in fits and starts, like the stock market

 

Eventually it evens out with good nights happening more often than poor or zero nights.

 

I thought I was stuck for life and now sleep 6-8 hours every night. 

 

My sleep really improved between month 10 off and month 24....from not so good to almost pre-Benzo and very good.

 

You can build a tolerance to melatonin and diphenhydramine....maybe stay away from nightly use???

 

Unfortunately almost everyone makes progress AFTER they are completely off....sorry for the bleak news

 

Sleep will return; especially if you didn't have sleep issues prior to Benzos?

 

Hang in there, it WILL get better. 

 

 

Thanks for you reply, TheWay2,

 

I am scared to stop taking melatonin and diphenhydramine. Melatonin worked for me for years before I ever got on benzos. I have heard about diphenhydramine not working for people after they have built a tolerance. Last night was another 3.5 hour night.

 

I am down to .16mg of Xanax from 4mg, so I guess I will wail until I am off completely to experience any real healing.

 

Thanks, again, for the response,

 

HM

Have you ever tried melatonin extended release? Maybe you could get 1/2-1h more.

 

It's not so easy to find a sleep aid that last 4-6h once you are an hard insomniac.

Q,

 

I will look into that. I'm not sure that my sleep aids are even helping. I am just assuming they are. I take them under the assumption that is why I am getting 2 to 3 hours of sleep.

 

Thanks for the reply

 

HM

I can’t imagine how hard it must be to get so little sleep. I am feeling dreadful during the day but I do sleep at night mostly on 1mg Melatonin. My heart goes out to you. It will get better for all of us….it really will. Bless you.

Thanks, Hardy, I have had several 7 hour nights in the last few weeks but I still get those 2 hour nights. Last night was 3.5 to 4 hours. Boy, I would love to sleep 9 hours! I hope that day comes.

 

HM

Thanks, Hardy, I have had several 7 hour nights in the last few weeks but I still get those 2 hour nights. Last night was 3.5 to 4 hours. Boy, I would love to sleep 9 hours! I hope that day comes.

 

HM

 

Heartmost, I am with you...I was doing well only to have 3 hours last night...Valerian is helping curve the cortisol rushes so my anxiety is much better.....I would love for this all to be over! My deepest sympathy...It is awful to have relief only to have it come back again insomnia...truly feel like I'm being tortured  :o

Hi Blue,

 

Yes, it is hard to have those 7 hour nights and then go back to a 2-hour night. I am a person that really values sleep a lot, so those nights when I don't get much are brutal.

 

Hoping we both get more sleep tonight.

 

HM

A 7h night is wonderful.

 

It's brutal going back to 2. Lack of sleep is a torture.

I hope you'll feel better soon.