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31 months off zopiclone still fighting


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Just thought I would have improved more by now. Am grateful the awful depression and total hopelessness has mainly gone, but still get days like that. But the anxiety never seems to improve feel like I am in Groundhog Day constantly. Just really feel the fact I was made to CT had contributed to the fact I'm still in this limbo, plus a really toxic family adding to the stress, I was actually happy on zopiclone never had side effects, no anxiety or kindling ,so frustrated that still got symptoms this long off, and yet to have a window. I know it takes a long time and nothing really makes a difference only time ,just tired of playing the waiting game☹️

 

 

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If I'm still not making much progress by 3 years might have to think trying something else. Constantly 1 step forward 2 steps back.

Hi Leann, I know it must be so hard to not have the progress you so desire. You did a CT and that had to be really hard, I could never have done that, and survived, I think you are very strong to have dealt with what you have. I do not have anything that will make it better, but time and healing is different for everyone. Also I know you have been through some incredibly stressful things with your Family. I have read many posts here of buddies that took a long time to heal, and one day it just got better, do not give up or lose Hope, keep distracted as you can. 💖 Peace and Healing.💦
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Yes thought I'd have closure when my Mum died, but she managed screw me up even when she'd gone. Just get so tired trying fight the symptoms. Ct wasn't my choice, don't think I'm strong, just case you don't have any other option . I really don't want take anything else, such catch 22 , whether anything else eventually going be another horrible withdrawal. Just want a B window pleeease!!!
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Yes thought I'd have closure when my Mum died, but she managed screw me up even when she'd gone. Just get so tired trying fight the symptoms. Ct wasn't my choice, don't think I'm strong, just case you don't have any other option . I really don't want take anything else, such catch 22 , whether anything else eventually going be another horrible withdrawal. Just want a B window pleeease!!!

Don't sell yourself short, many could not do CT, you are stronger than you think. Even when things are rough, the words we say about ourselves can be self defeating. You are both strong and kind, I have read your posts to others. I wish you wellness and windows soon.💖 Peace and Healing.💦
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Thank you that is so kind. Feeling very unloved by family at the moment, you have restored my faith in human nature. I didn't have a choice about going CT , new GP just stopped the meds. I do think that's why the symptoms lasted so long. Think lot others had tougher time than me actually stopping x
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Thank you that is so kind. Feeling very unloved by family at the moment, you have restored my faith in human nature. I didn't have a choice about going CT , new GP just stopped the meds. I do think that's why the symptoms lasted so long. Think lot others had tougher time than me actually stopping x

I think that when we taper or CT we lose ourselves and who we are, but please remember the goodness...it is still there, even with family problems and a windowless post CT, you are still the woman beneath the pain and disappointments,we just get overwhelmed. Use the strength you have to keep going forward. I believe that one day hopefully soon, things will get better...but you must believe and never give up that your day of healing will come. 💖 Peace and Healing.💦
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I'm trying to thank you. I'm lucky all the support on here, and got some really good friends. Just all the family stuff making it really hard not to feel the world's against you.Really hard when you've only got 1 child and get no support just criticism Too late now to have any more at my age!!! I did  manage to get to my pilates class started after 18 months lockdown so bit progress!
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Nothing I can say will help except keep going. Keep moving forward.

 

 

 

Thanks have accepted I'll never have a supportive family like other people have, trying to repeat expression" grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, and the courage to change things I can. I realise need try get past it all to improve but is B****y hard when my crutch namely zopiclone been taken away. Anyway plod on😍

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I'm trying to thank you. I'm lucky all the support on here, and got some really good friends. Just all the family stuff making it really hard not to feel the world's against you.Really hard when you've only got 1 child and get no support just criticism Too late now to have any more at my age!!! I did  manage to get to my pilates class started after 18 months lockdown so bit progress!

Give yourself credit for all the good you have done, and starting your class again is a good beginning. We cannot change our family, but we can change how we think about things. Each day is a new day to start...baby steps get larger. I for one believe that you will become a stronger person for what you have gone through, just the fact that you are here and doing each day the best you can, says volumes. No one has the perfect life, but we come to a point when we have to let some things go and take care of ourselves. You are so worth all good things. Stay Strong.💖 Peace and Healing.💦
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Thank you hopefully my son will calm down, I do think he is on autistic spectrum so will just have accept he views things differently to the rest of us. I do think supplements I'm taking are helping a bit. The weather here lovely at moment just trying to chill in the garden. Some of groups used go to gradually starting up will be a distraction.
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Really struggling with family stuff, can't believe nearly 32 months and going backwards. Some people should never have been mothers, mine was one of them. So bloody hard trying recover from withdrawal , when you had a mother who turned her whole family against each other. Just have keep fighting some how, some days think what's the point  at moment.l
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Just got really difficult family, think we'll have cut off contact with our son, just really unsupportive over everything won't talk to me,  my Mum f***ed up my life for years, he's doing same, need concentrate on my recovery. Just very hard at moment to make right decision. Withdrawal hard enough on it's own to deal with.
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Just so hard not to feel anything other than severe pain when your whole family turn against you, literally have no familybanymore. Everyone has commented how badly I've been treated, just given up on ever being happy again.
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  • 4 weeks later...
Still fighting but does no good. Still waiting for the celebration. Wondering about trying something else to ease symptoms. Can't take AD's so not sure what???
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Still fighting but does no good. Still waiting for the celebration. Wondering about trying something else to ease symptoms. Can't take AD's so not sure what???

 

I feel your frustration Leann , I can’t take AD’s either after many years on them and realising over time they did not agree with me , had some nasty side effects on them and getting off them ( I know they help some people and I’m happy for them ) I’m just sticking to trying to get on with life best I can and pray things will get much better as I’m sure they will . In and out of long waves is hurting me but I keep telling myself to keep my eye on the prize .

 

We will all get there eventually, all find our own ways of coping and ways of pushing through the minefield of recovery.

 

I think I’ve made bad choices along the way and probably caused some setbacks and I know stress and anxiety has not helped but hang in there , it’ll be ok and there will be plenty of celebration to come.

 

I follow your posts and a few others so please know I am wishing you all peace and happiness.

 

PO

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You sound similar timeline to me, same AD's. Whether they work better if you are given them at beginning of withdrawal I don't know. Just get so down with no windows. It's case how long do you leave it before you try something to help the symptoms? Catch 22 question!
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I suppose my view now is that anything “mind altering “ can’t actually be a good idea , these drugs have probably took their toll on me over the years and then of course the benzo . I made the foolish decision to try Zopiclone a few weeks ago , i just wanted to sleep, be out of it for a few hours , bad decision for me definitely set me back . We learn through our mistakes I suppose.

 

I think that the brain and body can heal and WILL heal in time. I would like to stay head med free.

 

Hope things improve for you soon , I see Meganz is doing great , now after the nightmare she had it just shows that things do turn around 👍

 

PO

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