My first drink again? (happy to be a case study)

First Drink question...potentially helpful feedback for all?

 

I had some of the worst symptoms you could imagine in December 2019 after just taking Ativan for 2-3 weeks. I finally feel back to normal. I know that because I closed a deal that’s never been done in history at my company, and people are like “holy %*%! you’re back!”...many thinking I’ve been out of it due to some other circumstances etc.

 

Anyways...in my mind I kept an idea that I’d drink again in December 2021 (2 years later).

 

Let’s say I wanted to just try to drink ok July 4th with family...am I taking a serious risk? Would the extra 5 months make a big difference?

 

I doubt I’d go crazy but maybe 2-3 drinks...

 

The feedback part is that I’d like to provide full details of how it went. I see many post thins without much followup. In a sense I’m semi ok with being a “beta tester”. I don’t mind some adverse effects, but is it possible to fully reset all my back to normal healing?

 

One part of me doesn’t think so, as even in the Ashton Guide she mentions it a few wouldn’t hurt.

 

Thoughts?

 

Try on 7/4 (1.5 year+ after withdrawal effects from 3 weeks of ativan)

 

Try on 12/31 (2 full years after...)

 

Am I overthinking it? I just hear horror stories from other posts, and I’ve also read posts of it helping.

I did try alcohol around the 18 month mark, it was only a drink but it put me in a hellish wave for about 2 weeks. I completely abstained after that for about a year. I then tried a small drink again and the after effects were less dramatic, I just felt a little more anxious and had tinnitus for about a week. One thing to note also is that it took about 3-4 days after the drink for the wave to set in, so I actually felt fine the day after and was thinking that I’d escaped a wave, but it just had a delay before it set in. I’ve heard some people can drink (in moderation) at 2 years but many can’t. It’s up to you if you want to take the risk, it is a gamble.

I appreciate the feedback.

 

I don’t consider a 1-2 week wave a high risk. I’m more concerned about fully reversing all my healing, is that a potential outcome?

 

 

Do a trial run with a sip or two of something low alcohol content. See how you feel the couple days following.

 

Do not start with a full drink.

Is it possible that people mentally prepare for ill effects and self inflict a surge of anxiety as they await for a negative reaction?

Is it possible that people mentally prepare for ill effects and self inflict a surge of anxiety as they await for a negative reaction?

 

Its entirely possible. But if the alcohol does affect you adversely you will be dealing with more than just anxiety.

 

But I really hope you can enjoy this aspect of life again. I'm not there yet, but I miss having a glass of wine. Maybe one day!

I may do a full single drink (a beer/spiked seltzer) and let you know. My only concern is reversing healing. If that’s not a worry, I don’t mind a potential “wave”. I think it will be fine but willing to try it out for the greater good of the community and log any impacts.

I don't think it will set you back to square one, but can't help but think you were only on Ativan 2-3 weeks.  Does this mean you are extra sensitive? Idk.

 

I used Valium much longer than you and had terrible response when I tried alcohol again.  Only a couple of drinks, but I did have a previous drinking problem.  Hard to tell who's overly sensitive or not with this stuff.  I will never drink again.  The one silver lining to come out this horrible experience. 

 

Looks like you want to give it a go maybe follow Trina's advice and start out small amount low alcohol content. 

 

Good luck.  As a moderate drinker it would be a loss.

I am 2 years off and for the last couple months I have been doing the "micro dose" method, lol

A few sips here and there, and then a half of drink, I have still yet to drink a whole one though! But I'll get there, haha

I can't see how it would set you back hugely, although as mentioned it did take you a long time to recover from short use Ativan. If you want to be able to have a couple of social drinks 4th July, I would have a small drink now and build up slowly. I've been testing the water with the occasional drink, it does put me into a wave for a few hours a couple of days later, but I'm soon back to baseline

I would happily give up drinking for the rest of my life to never experience WD again. 

I’m 8 months out and have a glass of wine every night. I started this last month when I learned that one glass of wine might reduce alpha 4 gaba subunits which are evil anxiety causing gaba receptors. I’m not sure it helped but it hasn’t hurt and I’ve continued to heal at the same infuriating slow pace.

I don’t consider a 1-2 week wave a high risk. I’m more concerned about fully reversing all my healing, is that a potential outcome?

 

YES. No professional on Earth (or anybody on Earth for that matter) will be able to tell you what will happen if you drink after your body has been altered by benzos.

 

My only regret in life is having alcohol after stopping my first taper. The problem with drinking is that if the benzodiazepine withdrawal syndromes starts again, it won't stop just by stopping drinking - you'll either have to wait for the days, weeks, months, or years for the symptoms to stop, or you will have to reinstate and taper again.