Rest or push through?

One of the more challenging aspects of benzo mood instability is choosing whether to push myself to action or rest when I have a mood/energy crash.

 

My depressed feelings are mixed with anxiety, and anything I do risks exacerbating one or the other. Sometimes pushing myself to action helps break a negative mood cycle. Other times, it makes it worse because the pressure is too much. But when I rest, I’m afraid I’m going to slip into deeper depression.

 

Does anyone else experience this? How do you decide what to do?

These are very thoughtful questions, I wish I had an answer but it seems to me there a isn't one size fits all, each time it happens will need to be addressed differently.  I'm like you, I fear the inaction that comes with depression because it feels like it's feeding it. 

 

I wonder if you could find a way to still push yourself but temper your expectations of what you want to accomplish.  I'd like to see you be gentle with yourself but still reach for distraction and activity over letting the darkness win.

 

I have to tell you I've only experienced real depression once in my life and that was when I was taking Ambien so my experience is limited and perhaps shortsighted so if it is, I apologize.

I personally rest, when my depression is really bad I believe it's because there's more healing happening. So my body is already under stress trying to heal, adding in any more stresses could make things worse.

 

That's just me tho, everyone is different. I suppose you need to try both and find out what works best for you. I often feel like I'm my own guinea pig through this

Hi CW,

 

Do you experience physical symptoms too which would be made worse by pushing through?  Or is it primarily the anxiety and depression?

 

If you do not risk making physical symptoms worse, and you are able, I believe that some gentle exercise (yoga, walking in nature) are some of the best options out there for mental symptoms.  I was fascinated by the background of this explained in the book "Spark" by John Ratey.  In there he describes the biochemistry associated with exercise and how it is enormously helpful for anxiety and depression. 

 

I wish you much healing!

Thats THE essential question in depression. And you will find a way to balance it out. Sometimes you need to rest, sometimes you need to push. As long as you pay attention to what is happening the next hours or days and then learn from it, nothing bad will happen. It is the perfect mixture we need and you seem already to have a kind of wisdom when to do what. The insecurity if you are right is normal at the beginning, later you will feel more secure. And: Try new things. this might scare you even more, but stimulates the brain and gives you more option for the next time. Keep the dosage in mind if you push and when you rest as well.

And after a push, I found it helpful to think like "okey, and now I can lay in bed for some hours" when  I did something I had to push myself through. And on the other side, I could allow myself to rest longer but then said "okey, but now I do the dishes". 

Wow, these are wise responses and I think I can take pieces of each as I refine my understanding of my needs. Experimenting while at the same time finding space for ease has been a big theme. And I think because I’ve had to be intentional about it, I’m much more in tune with myself than before benzos. Like, today I just crashed in energy and there was no pulling me away from couch and podcasts. And I think that continues until I feel the inertia building up and I need to move my body. I rested today (despite my worries), so I’ll see what comes up tomorrow. Thanks again!

Wow, these are wise responses and I think I can take pieces of each as I refine my understanding of my needs. Experimenting while at the same time finding space for ease has been a big theme. And I think because I’ve had to be intentional about it, I’m much more in tune with myself than before benzos. Like, today I just crashed in energy and there was no pulling me away from couch and podcasts. And I think that continues until I feel the inertia building up and I need to move my body. I rested today (despite my worries), so I’ll see what comes up tomorrow. Thanks again!

 

Same here - and it is wise to give the body what it needs. I felt so depressed and exhausted today. My best strategies then: Nutrition and my bed. So I pushed myself to cook a nice stew with meat and veggies and made myself a green smoothie and a big pot of tea. And then I allowed myself to be in bed for 5 hours, naps, listening to Netflix.. and my mood is much better now. The body still exhausted but I feel more stable.

One of the more challenging aspects of benzo mood instability is choosing whether to push myself to action or rest when I have a mood/energy crash.

 

My depressed feelings are mixed with anxiety, and anything I do risks exacerbating one or the other. Sometimes pushing myself to action helps break a negative mood cycle. Other times, it makes it worse because the pressure is too much. But when I rest, I’m afraid I’m going to slip into deeper depression.

 

Does anyone else experience this? How do you decide what to do?

 

Seems depression and anxiety often go together. In my case is a similar cunumdrum but there too seems an element of guilt. I don't usually take action as I used to because in my current state of crisis and of extremely instability, I try not to concern myself with what direction I should go. Seems better to let it go, get help if possible. I too worry about the depth of my depression, that I'll go insane from how deep it gets sometimes. Most of the time if honestly feel I cannot live with it another day, even another hour.

So sorry you're into it so deeply. Wish I had better answers.

One of the more challenging aspects of benzo mood instability is choosing whether to push myself to action or rest when I have a mood/energy crash.

 

My depressed feelings are mixed with anxiety, and anything I do risks exacerbating one or the other. Sometimes pushing myself to action helps break a negative mood cycle. Other times, it makes it worse because the pressure is too much. But when I rest, I’m afraid I’m going to slip into deeper depression.

 

Does anyone else experience this? How do you decide what to do?

 

Seems depression and anxiety often go together. In my case is a similar cunumdrum but there too seems an element of guilt. I don't usually take action as I used to because in my current state of crisis and of extremely instability, I try not to concern myself with what direction I should go. Seems better to let it go, get help if possible. I too worry about the depth of my depression, that I'll go insane from how deep it gets sometimes. Most of the time if honestly feel I cannot live with it another day, even another hour.

So sorry you're into it so deeply. Wish I had better answers.

 

Oh Catt, I wished I could come over and give you a hug. I know this anxiety when we are depressed it is horrible and kind of a sister to depression. I called all these feelings "the family of depression".. I hope it will get better for your soon