I am having anxiety just reading stories

Hi people.

I am scared about going off these meds. I am currently not working and the thought of not sleeping with make me go crazy!!  I don't want to be a coward, but I feel like I am loosing everything.  My family I know has given me suggestions to help, but I am afraid to even leave my house.  Any suggestions would be great.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

On 4mgs of clonazepam and 400mg of trazadone.

Hello

 

 

 

What would it be like if tomorrow for some reason (natural disaster, change of doctors etc.) you suddenly had no klonopin (O as in Nada)?

 

Knowing what you now know about withdrawal symptoms and just how bad it can get with a C/T (planned or otherwise) might be just the thing to motivate you

to taper at your own pace on your terms.

 

 

When I discovered what you now know I began my taper in short order.

 

No way was I going to have my doctor decide to stop prescribing (he actually did C/T me from my restoril for no good reason about 1/2 way through my K taper).

 

What would I do if all of a sudden my 6mg/day klonopin supply was cut off?

 

Bad thought.

 

The thought of a second taper being more difficult (more intense symptoms) kept me pushing on through the worst of my withdrawal.

 

Today I still keep putting distance between me and that last dose knowing that if I fail with my attempt at benzo freedom a second try may be more difficult.

 

At going on 5 months Benzo Free most of my withdrawal symptoms are gone or quite tolerable (inner trembling is my remaining symptom).

 

I was more comfortable a year ago this time when I was at about 6mgK and just getting gong with my taper.

 

Now I do not have to live in fear of suffering like so many have with a C/T or going up higher in dose to get relief as tolerance sets in or more Brain Damage the longer I am exposed to Benzos.

 

 

My suggestion is to develop a safe slow taper and Git-R-Done.

 

 

Acceptance that it will hurt and you will get better helps to give us the strength we need to become benzo free.

 

 

Teakettle

 

 

 

Hi jjbutterfly,

 

I was stuck in the position that Teakettle just talked about. My doctor cut me off and I had to do something really quick. I didn't really have the time to find another quack to help me.

 

I ended up going to a detox program at a hospital, I was on 4 mg of xanax - that's equivalent to 4 mg Klon. It was NOT easy to CT like that and I wouldn't recommend it if you can avoid it.

 

If it's any consolation, I don't have near the anxiety now that I had while I was ON benzos, I still suffer w/d symptoms but I'm getting better.

Don't assume you will get various symptoms.  Most people on here kept telling me I would have those sleeping issues and I never had them at all.

Hello JjButterfly,

 

I wanted to comment on what to do about when to start a taper. I found that doing research before I started my taper to be helpful. I researched how to safely get off a benzo and shared that with my doctor. He has been and continues to be supportive of my slow taper. I have learned that there is a great deal we learn from our first dose reduction. This experience is different for everyone. So, along with that comes the knowledge overtime what your experience will be. I have been in the process of tapering from 5mg of Klonopin that I had been prescribed for 5 years since April 2009. I have found a slow taper to be manageable. I have also found that I needed support from those that have been there or are currently going through this. I found the road to be lonely at times. I joined BenzoBuddies after I had been tapering for 10 months. BenzoBuddies has and continues to be a wonderful support during my recovery.

 

So, I would just say it is important to start a taper when you are ready and if there is anything we can do to support you, let us know.

 

How are you feeling today?

 

 

Summer

 

Dear JJbutterfly,

 

I began Klonopin for anxiety not for sleep, however I did want to sleep all the time when I was on it.  But I've been off almost 3 months now and I have had not problem sleeping.  Although many don't like supplements there are some that can help you sleep,  don't know if they will work for you or not.....I do believe the Benzo's will continue to imprison you.  Getting off is hard, some days it doesn't seem like its worth it, others do.  If you can do it slowly, I didn't I hear that really helps.  You are not alone!!

jjbutterfly,

 

I know how you feel.. or once did, I think.. it is scary and just to note.. I had one lady to tell me that I would be very bad off, in as so much I wouldn't be able to do anything, this was a long time ago in 2007.. I was on 5mg of Klonopin, sometimes more I think.. not sure.. I started my taper at 5mg. Basically my withdrawal has consisted of setbacks, but like those that are emotional, things coming back that I felt before the Benzos. I have felt anxiety, but sometimes not as bad as described.. as in shaking in corners in a hole somewhere. I've had w/d symptom's but not to some degree that it felt like HELL, as we don't know what THIS HELL truly is, Ashton even says Hell can be over exaggerated. I have withdrawn slowly, 3 years now, going on 4. Nah, don't be afraid.. I know it's hard not to be, but when I first started tapering I felt better.. I functioned well for a year and a half then got sick ONLY BECAUSE I WAS TAPERING TOO FAST! I had to c/o to Valium, it's no party but it beat the Klonopin for tapering.. my body grew tired of Klonopin after 6 or 7 years.

To note, I'm also Schizophrenic and let me tell you.. it can be much worse than Benzo w/d...! If I'm not treated, Psychosis is horrible.

People say w/d is the worse thing, but I think Psychosis ranks #1 on my list, at least in w/d you know, you are actually in touch with reality.. unlike psychosis, where you lose all touch with reality even your own name, parent's name and so on..

The only thing I can tell you GO SLOW on your taper.. it's setbacks, Adrenaline kicks and your old self coming back what it is, what the Benzo suppressed comes out..

You may not even get Insomnia.. I sleep pretty well now on a lower dose, perhaps the Benzo was my problem with Insomnia!

All you're doing is taking out what you put in.. and gaining your life back.

I'm not going to tell you it's like being forked down in a pot thrown into hell and gulped up by black flames.. not very considerate and not at all like that .. Ashton, if you read her manual says Hell is over exaggerated.. I have a friend on xanax and will not come off it because of some of the stories posted all over the net.

 

I have c/t and let me tell you a taper is BEST!

 

S#

 

 

Thanks everyone for your support and kind words.  Is anyone currently not working as they go through withdrawal, and if so, what do you do with your time?

Thanks everyone for your support and kind words.  Is anyone currently not working as they go through withdrawal, and if so, what do you do with your time?

 

I don't work at the time, I do tutor in the afternoons, I write and study, as I have some online courses.

 

You mention you're afraid to come off the Klonopin, here's what I did to prepare myself, and I started at 5mg of Klonopin.

I thought about the women in the 70's who took Valium every chance they got, it was highly prescribed, I know one of them who recently passed because of old age, not from a Benzo.

Anyway I thought about how they got off it and are better today.

I thought, "If I don't start titrating off this stuff, I will have to keep upping it!"

I already felt numb and like a sloth!

I started out with water titration at my own pace, it actually wasn't so bad.. I got down to 2.25mg and switched to Valium, I've been tapering since 2007, so go at your own pace, as Ashton says, 'What's the hurry?"

You will probably find relief, I did, we all vary .. but after feeling like that, I felt relief and yes I slept .. but go at your own pace.

 

It is a good idea to start a project you enjoy and stick with it for distraction, you will get there.

 

S#

One woman on here was told by her doctor to stop coming here reading anything.  If it bothers you, try not to read the actual stories and read other things on here.  I read so many people's stories about no sleep for days and I feared the same thing.  yet I never had that happen even for a single day coming off of mine.

I actually had that happen as well, but when I realized that knowledge is power, I began to look at the stories in a way where they did help. IF I had a symptom mentioned, I'd tell myself that it was the drug and not anything else. It helped. I could sometimes feel my brain go into high gear and before the thought of fear could grip, I'd neutralize it with a positive, truth thought. Fear is this False Evidence That Appears Real. I try to do the opposite of what fear tells me to do and then I begin to overcome it and gain confidence.

 

I do understand your fear of not sleeping. I had an episode when my hormones crashed after getting poisoned  :'( and it was really horrible. I didn't sleep for 9 months because they had me taking too high of a dose of hormones. But, now that they are balanced, I sleep like a baby. Coming off Klonopin hasn't cause me one problem. I do believe a lack of sleep many times is hormone imbalance and it can affect all ages. Exercise and meditation should help as well. It sounded like you began the drugs because you couldn't sleep. Perhaps, you should have someone check out why you can't sleep. Saliva tests are really accurate with hormones and cortisol levels of the adrenals. Not too many doctors do them, but if you can not find one to do it, you can do them through ZRT labs on line. Then when you get the results you can see a doctor and choose a treatment.

 

I don't work either. I try to keep my mind busy and I always find getting out of the house, walking at the mall, or a movie really helps. Talking on the phone helps too. I wish you the best. Know you are not alone and everything you experience others have too and you will make it! God Bless you.

One woman on here was told by her doctor to stop coming here reading anything.  If it bothers you, try not to read the actual stories and read other things on here.  I read so many people's stories about no sleep for days and I feared the same thing.  yet I never had that happen even for a single day coming off of mine.

 

I am sticking with the success stories on here, so much bad news that just reading freaks me right out and i get the whole thing way out of perspective... i have tapered one cut so far and yet reading on here a lot today has really caused me to feel really anxious like this is going to be impossible...

 

Others have said i will be fine... i need to read the more positive out comes... i just get too fearful reading some stories on here... but i am sure we all heal, i hate reading that others are having a rough time... i only hope i can be of help once i get off and i will try and help others once i am better myself.

 

 

jj,

 

I was (am) not working.  It's just a really rough patch in my life.  I was also very very scared.  Of course it was the benzo interdose withdrawal plus the taper withdrawal.  Just so incredibly scared, it was horrific.

 

As for time, really not much fun, really bored, but not well enough to do anything.  It's really one day at a time.  Whatever makes you feel good, baths, walks, relaxation tapes.

 

As  for sleep, the sleepless nights did not start until I was off the benzos, and by then, I was in a much better state to deal with them.  Worry is no predictor of outcome.  It makes no sense to worry about sleepless nights until you're there. Besides your probably really well versed on sleep hygiene by now.

 

On the topic of sleep anxiety, many people have it here, since many people started on benzos for sleep.  You're in good company.  Once I was off benzo, the fear of not sleeping decreased very rapidly.  You can check the insomnia boards, there are many good suggestions there.  Take heart, it gets better.

Well, its been a crazy winter 2011 to say the least.  I went to detox and they cold turkeyed me from all my medications.  I went into a delirium and they reinstated the clonazepam to 5mg.  Currently, I take 3mg at bedtime and 2 mg in the morning.  I'm down on my trazadone which was at 400mg, now down to 200mg and the psychiatrist put me on remeron to stabilize my depression.  I'm serious now and know I need advice about how to do a substitution taper from the clonazepam to valium.  What should I tell my doctor to start doing for this substitution?  I need help in making up a plan of attack to substitute over.  Thanks again for everyone's responses.

Well, its been a crazy winter 2011 to say the least.  I went to detox and they cold turkeyed me from all my medications.  I went into a delirium and they reinstated the clonazepam to 5mg.  Currently, I take 3mg at bedtime and 2 mg in the morning.  I'm down on my trazadone which was at 400mg, now down to 200mg and the psychiatrist put me on remeron to stabilize my depression.  I'm serious now and know I need advice about how to do a substitution taper from the clonazepam to valium.  What should I tell my doctor to start doing for this substitution?  I need help in making up a plan of attack to substitute over.  Thanks again for everyone's responses.

 

jjbutterfly,

 

We can help you with your taper.

Can you please ask here-

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?board=61.0

 

If your doctor is willing to prescribe you Valium to cross to from the Klonopin.. that would be great IMO.

Of course, you can also titrate the Klonopin as well.

I tapered from 4-5mg of Klonopin to 2.25mg and did a c/o. So far, so good.

Also you may want to read the Ashton Manual, if you have not already. It's very informative.

 

Ashton Manual-

http://www.benzo.org.uk/manual/index.htm.

 

Between you and your doctor, you can talk about using Valium to taper the Klonopin.

Of course at 5mg of Klonopin, that is equiv. to 100mg of Valium, and I know of no doctor to prescribe that much Valium.

As long as you have enough Klonopin and Valium to do the c/o in stages.. you should be fine. The stages are within the Ashton Manual.

Give it a read, and get back to us.

You can ask any questions you may have.

 

S#

Oka, so if I stick with the .25mg taper that means it will take about a year to get off.  I suppose this is accurate considering that I have been on the stuff for 10 years.  If all goes well, can I substitute valium when I get down to 2.25mg of clonazepam? Again, thanks for everyone's help!  What dose of valium would you suggest to switch to when I get down to 2.25mg of clonazepam?  I read the Ashton manual, but I find it a bit confusing!

Hi,

 

I was in the same situation, about not wanting to come off the meds after doing countless hours of research, and the withdrawal that I would face. 

 

I never thought I would be able to come off as well without having seizures due how addicted my body was to the medicine.  What you have to do is find the right taper plan, and taper down very slow. 

 

You will deal with some withdrawal symptoms, but they shouldn't be as intense as coming off cold turkey.  The symptoms you will face eventually you'll just have to will through.  Just find something to motivate you when you go through tough days.

 

I know you'll be able to get through it if I've gotten where I am today, because I was just as frightened as anyone coming off this stuff.