11 months - unbelievable!

If you have been following my updates, you may have noticed that most of my milestones were positive in that I continued to show good progress and the waves seemed to diminish.  However, at month 11 I have been hit by a terrible wave--one that reminds me of the early days after I jumped.  Lack of sleep, burning skin, a rash on my chest, tinnitus, low energy, bad mood. 

As a result, I have had to take defensive measures to curb the anxiety.  These methods were learned a few years ago when I went to therapy. 

Here is what I am doing:

1. Little to no screen time, save for some relaxation videos on YouTube or some light travel shows on TV.

2. No social media.  (This is why I have been largely absent from here.)  Instead I made time to talk to family and friends.

3. No caffeine or alcohol.

4. Take breaks from work.  (I took today and Monday off.)

5. Exercise.  When I was feeling weak, I would just walk outside.  But most of the time I was able to do my workout routine, but with lower intensity.

6. Distract.  I am back to doing jigsaw puzzles.  Also the travel videos help me.  Been watching the walking tour of Berlin on YouTube.  Reminds me of my fun trips to Germany.  (Berlin is one of my most favorite cities to visit! )

7. Eat a healthy....aw heck no....I have been baking and cooking and largely eating what I want, though I do limit portions.  I have been making my own Italian Bread and lots of homemade pasta.  I spent an entire day making homemade ravioli with spinach and ricotta cheese.  I made several hundred and gave bags of them away as gifts.  The next day I was wiped out.  How did my Grandma do it?

8. Practice good sleep hygiene.  I do this normally and limiting screen time does help.  I slept a solid 4 hours the other night, and last night slept most of the night--although I did take a Tylenol PM. 

The sleep is starting to improve and so I am hopeful the wave will end soon.  I will not let this get me down.  Since I am off today, I will run a nice oatmeal bath as it helps soothe the rash and relaxes me.  After that I may take a nice nap.  Why not? 

Happy 2021 to everyone.  I wish all of you endless windows!

Thanks for sharing your update and helpful tips!

It seems as though most buddies have hit a wave these last couple weeks.  In your case do you think the stress of the holidays may have been an trigger?

My benzo brain obviously read your post wrong....but this wave will end! I had a minor wave for a few weeks myself...its part of coming through this.....

Nice job Shack! 11 months is a great milestone for sure. The hard part is mostly behind you, not to say you wont have some difficult days but nothing like where you have come from. I know when I get a good nights sleep I feel great, I think more clearly, my reasoning and logic is almost normal. I use a Fitbit to monitor my sleep and my heart rate. I kept some screen shots of my sleep patterns from late last year and 2019. My sleep is much improved. Your comment about sleep hygiene is most important. Take care of your sleep and your symptoms will improve for the most part. I made my BR cool, pleasant colors, room darkening curtains and have a most comfortable bed...makes a huge difference.

Keep everyone posted, posts like yours give those still in the tough days HOPE.....

J

Me too, RShack...big ol’ wave over here. I know yours will pass quickly and you’ll be back on track in no time. Congratulations on 11 months!! Big time!!

Beauty

Thanks everyone for your responses.  The day off of work definitely helped my mood.

@deanna: my first thought was that stress triggered this, but the stress has been no greater than it was throughout the rest of the year, so I do not know.  Our minds want to attach to something and find a reason, but my feelings are telling me that this is just part of the crazy recovery process.

@jstone:  sleep has been slowly improving this week and yes, it makes a huge difference.  I took nothing last night and got a solid 6 hours.