Holiday Depression

It’s not uncommon for depression to occur during the holidays when family and friends fall away and one tends to feel a bit lonelier, especially later on in life. My case is no different but quite a bit worse going through the Benzo ordeal. I’m at 50+ months off Clonazepam, getting worse since July 2019. Possibly regressing, back to being bedridden 22/7. I had only hoped to at least be up for a little while for X-mas but couldn’t. Forced myself up, fixed my appearance up a bit and sat at the dinner table which is a rare occurrence anymore. Wasn’t long before I had to get back to bed. Watched an old movie, took another Seroquil watched the minutes tic by wishing to at least a few windows. The highlight of the day is falling asleep which doesn’t last near as long as I would hope. Not seeking advice, just sort of wondering how others are coping with the holidays.

Hello.  Sorry that your holidays are not what you had hoped for, but I guess there are many of us who either just weathered through it, enjoyed some aspects of it, or are recovered enough to really enjoy it.  I fall somewhere in the middle with many good days leading up to it, shopping, baking and decorating for the first time in three years.  Christmas past of 2018 and 2019 found me pretty much bedridden/house bound and sad.  This year, I rallied right up to Christmas Eve, when I began to feel flu-like and icky.  Woke up Christmas morning feeling awful, but pushed myself to dress and travel to visit my son.  As the day wore on, I began to feel much better and ended the day on a good note.  Alas, woke up this morning feeling flu-like again, but am going to follow through again by hopping out of bed and preparing for a visit to my brother.  I take full responsibility for a return to some bad BWD symptoms, with the admission that my diet has been one of sugar and more sugar!  Way too much eating of all the wrong foods brought me out of a really good, long window and back into a moderate wave.  I hope that this time next year that we and all other recovering BBs are making merry and feeling healthy and happy :smitten: