Emotional shutdown

Hi again, I haven't been able to taper for months now.  I feel so hopeless and I made a mistake of making a huge life decision thinking I had support but really didn't.  I thought we had decided to plan to move.  Now, it's like several rugs were pulled out from under me.

Everything where we live feels so entirely wrong to me.  When I go back home, I feel stronger and better.  It's like someone is screaming in my ear "GO!".

I've posted all my woes before.  I am so lonely and can't really make efforts socially because I am so miserable. I just don't know how to improve our life.  I need a real change and have no support.  Now, I just don't know what I am doing.  I have kids and can't pull it together for them.  My husband is trying to hold it together.

Everything used to feel so bad, kick in the stomach, foot on my chest anxiety/depression.  Now, I just don't really feel much.  I feel sad and hopeless.  My psych said that under such stress, I'm probably shutting down emotionally.

I know there are people who are and have been in worse situations than me and pull themselves out.  I just keep hoping that I can do it but I know my thinking is so negative.  I just don't see a way out or a way to improve anything.