Coping with Cog Fog?

Hi all!

I am currently having to do a forced taper of prescription Ativan due to multiple circumstances beyond my control. I've taken this for 5 years and at 0.5mg twice per day. I have very suddenly and rapidly decreased my dosage, which I am definitely aware is a bad idea, but I didn't have any other option.

I'm already experiencing some sort of side effects and withdrawals. My main problem is feeling like I have that "cogfog" or cognitive fog, basically that my thoughts are slower and I'm not able to keep up as much as I feel I should.

This is a problem. I'm sure many people have experienced this and needed to be sharp to perform their daily tasks, but my "job" requires me to do this and more. I am a graduate student. Thinking is my job.

How can I manage these and similar withdrawal symptoms when I need to be "on" all the time? I'm exhausted by most things and am not sure what to do to carry on with daily life stuff as well as being able to constantly think critically.

I can't help it, I love your username, it makes me smile. 

I quit cold turkey and worked all through my recovery except for the first three weeks so I can relate to your situation.  Yours is probably worse than mine though because I was able to go back to a job I knew well and I had a great team in place to help me.  I let a couple of them know my situation and they were able to step in when I needed help.

Because I was working at such a deficit I had to come up with strategies to get me through.  I took furious notes and stalled for time until I could get a quiet moment to think things through, I made lists of tasks I couldn't seem to complete in my normal time frame so I could take them home with me to prioritize since I couldn't sleep or relax.  I made excuses to take quiet moments for myself, a walk outside around the building in order to give me some quiet time to think.

I know these probably won't apply to you but I'm sure you can find some coping skills that might be helpful in your situation.

One last thing, what you're feeling and going through right now will change, it may improve and it may get worse but it will change, then change again.  You'll find ways to adapt to your symptoms because you have to.  I feel that the fact that you have these responsibilities will actually work to your benefit because you don't have the choice to take time off, to give into your pain, you have to perform and I have no doubt you can and will.

totally agree with Pamster on the note taking. I have always made lists to keep organized, but I'm having a bit of a problem remembering things sometimes..ok all the tie right now. Its a mixture of fog and distraction. So I write down notes for everything now if its something really relevant.

I too have found convenient excuses to mask what's going on..not lies..just not the entire story. Like "oh I'm struggling with a headache (true bc I get these..)"..Oh i'm a little tired today (true bc I have a lot of fatigue)... you get the idea.

I find I can get a thought going but it might take me a little longer to process. Professionally you can make it look like your being highly intelligent and contemplative " weighing your options" if you will. Academia is all about higher thought and processing so I'm sure you'll find ways to mask this.

Frustrating, but doable. Honestly you may find your brain will swing like a pendulum..some days I feel like my brain goes into manic mode and my thoughts are very quick and is constantly firing ideas - then back to the fog.

However, I've done a rapid taper from Ativan so I can relate. It will definitely be challenging as your brain tries to figure things out and heal. The body has to heal too. Please be kind and patient with yourself. Allow yourself down time as you can because you will need it.

Hi! I think Pamster and Trina gave you the best adivce you could receive here, so there's nothing much I could contribute with except ask you whether you're a smoker. I'm trying to quit smoking right now, as I can feel that my health is getting worse, and if I don't smoke, the cog fog and rapid heart rate are not as strong. Do you drink caffeine or smoke? I can definitely tell you if you cut them out of your lifestyle, it may make things better for you now. I know it's easier said than done, of course.

Otherwise, yes, I'm also suffering from terrible cog fog and derealization right now. I can definitely relate. It should gradually start getting better, so don't lose faith! 

You can do this...I know how difficult grad school can be without going through WD!

Cog Fog is a pretty common symptom.  I had DP/DR as well as debilitating claustrophobia.

I was able to continue to work at a job I love and had done for 20+ years too.

As Pamster said, I was open and honest about my situation and shared a nice letter from a Benzo-wise psychiatrist with my supervisor.

I qualified for the Family Medical Leave Act (FMLA) but never used it.  Instead, I used sick days as needed, on the really tough days and I ended up using about 20 or so.

Since thinking is your job, work with your professors and come to some type of arrangement, if possible, where you can have extra time to turn things in, etc.  Take full advantage of the days or hours when you feel "normal" to knock out as much work as possible.

Good luck!

Thank you all for your responses! You are so helpful, lovely to be a new part of this community.

One last thing, what you're feeling and going through right now will change, it may improve and it may get worse but it will change, then change again.  You'll find ways to adapt to your symptoms because you have to.  I feel that the fact that you have these responsibilities will actually work to your benefit because you don't have the choice to take time off, to give into your pain, you have to perform and I have no doubt you can and will.

Pamster, I already am a BIG list maker so that's a great coping skill It is really good to keep in mind that this situation will change, somehow, someway.

I too have found convenient excuses to mask what's going on..not lies..just not the entire story. Like "oh I'm struggling with a headache (true bc I get these..)"..Oh i'm a little tired today (true bc I have a lot of fatigue)... you get the idea.

I find I can get a thought going but it might take me a little longer to process. Professionally you can make it look like your being highly intelligent and contemplative " weighing your options" if you will. Academia is all about higher thought and processing so I'm sure you'll find ways to mask this.

Trina, that's a great way to think more about things but not make it about cog fog! And you're right, it's not a lie, just not the full truth

Hi! I think Pamster and Trina gave you the best adivce you could receive here, so there's nothing much I could contribute with except ask you whether you're a smoker. I'm trying to quit smoking right now, as I can feel that my health is getting worse, and if I don't smoke, the cog fog and rapid heart rate are not as strong. Do you drink caffeine or smoke? I can definitely tell you if you cut them out of your lifestyle, it may make things better for you now. I know it's easier said than done, of course.

BenzoMutant, nooooo say it ain't so! I am a coffee drinker....should I try cutting down?

You can do this...I know how difficult grad school can be without going through WD!

...

As Pamster said, I was open and honest about my situation and shared a nice letter from a Benzo-wise psychiatrist with my supervisor.

...

Take full advantage of the days or hours when you feel "normal" to knock out as much work as possible.

Theway, I think I'm starting to feel some DP/DR so :/

I have been debating the idea of how open and honest I should be with my advisor. I do understand the advantages of it but there's also always (unfortunately) the politics behind it all. Definitely trying to take the time where I can to be productive! Thanks!