14 months

Hi guys

My last post was about 7 or 8 months off, so i decided to make a new one.  I was a very extreme case(i am still), but i have to say that things are doing better. I think i am tired of all this and i just want to heal, even i know it wont happen over night. The strange thing is, in some aspects i felt better at 11 months off, at least my mind is telling me so.. It is very strange. Some times i have the feeling i will never be better, and this is it. I know i have to give it more time, but it is so hard after 14 months to give it more time. Some times i ask my self what did i so wrong in my life to end up here. I am a very good person and allways willing to help others.. i ask my self is this it with my enjoyment of life.. at months 9 10 11 i felt more hopeful because i was going to the one year mark. I dont experinece much of windows. My worst enemy is the DP DR and tinnitus. Everything else is not so bad.. i am scared that ive lost my mind, and will never recover. When i talk it feels strange to me and i have so stupid toughts about existence... i had this sympthom at the beginning but is was gone. Now i feel kinda better in term of presence in reality  but this strange sympthom is again here and i tought it was gone.

 

Yesterday i was feeling little bit better and i tryed a little cup of coffee. I tought hey man at 14 months i can give it a try.. After 40 min i had the worst mental torture after acute.. i had the feeling my mind is out of my body completely and i would stand next to me.

For sure, im not gona drink it again.

 

I want to thank some people here who were with me in my first months of acute.

 

I do feel better even sometimes i have the feeling i am not making any progress since month 9... but sometimes i ask my self, am i really better or am i just used to this torture. I dint know. Ive heard some say month 12 13 and 14 are hard and then comes big relief at 16 or so.. i am waiting for that now.

 

I am sorry if someone feels bad or anxious because of my post. I know, in the first months, how i was freakin out when read so. Please do not take my journey as a example. There are many people healed at this point.

I'm sorry you're still suffering. I read your post and couldn't help but think that you're definitely a warrior. Keep being strong. Stay focused and allow yourself more time. You will continue to heal. Please don't be discouraged. I'm looking forward to my healing as well. One thing for sure, I'm determined to get out of this bed! Best wishes to you.

You will get better. I remember at my 12 month mark where I was so excited to make ONE YEAR. Felt like crap! My good days were becoming really good days. Even the tough days were not that bad. Mostly my sleep! If I could sleep I was usually pretty good.

 

Then it started happening. Around 14 to 16 months I felt more relaxed when I went to bed. I could actually turn my thoughts off and just relax and get a good nights sleep. It was great.

 

I am almost 19 months now. I had a couple tough nights of sleep but at my age I think that happens to everyone. My healing just made a quick progression. I am now certain I am mostly healed but good days are getting better.

 

Hang tough my friend, it will get better when you least expect it.

 

JS

I am also suffering from same Dp/Dr and/or Brain fog. .. Keep pushing as you are at 14mons...I have heard most people heal in 2nd year. so just think few more months may be or could be days..... stay positive my friend  :thumbsup:

Thanks guys...

Hi soldier1, I'm so happy to see you again but sorry this post isn't in success stories.    It sounds like you're still in the fight, but every single minute away from the drug is a step towards full recovery so keep on this path and you'll get there.

 

Please keep coming back, I'm cheering for you to reach the other side. 

Hi soldier1, I'm so happy to see you again but sorry this post isn't in success stories.    It sounds like you're still in the fight, but every single minute away from the drug is a step towards full recovery so keep on this path and you'll get there.

 

Please keep coming back, I'm cheering for you to reach the other side. 

 

Thanks Pamster.

I can only hope it gets better.