Only Thing I Look Forward to is Sleeping

I've recovered my sleep, for the most part. I'm getting 6-8 hours on week nights now as long as I go to bed early. I still can't sleep in but at this point, that doesn't really bother me. I'm also napping all the time.

 

I'm really not improving mentally despite sleeping well. Every day I wake up and just feel like I need to sleep more and more. Sleep is about the only thing I look forward to besides meals. I know I should be counting my blessings because it's taken me about 24-29 months to be able to sleep again, but why am I not improving mentally? I don't feel any love for people. I don't care about hobbies. I feel like I still have mental aka. Constantly fatigued. Don't really look forward to hanging out with people anymore like I once did. The biggest one is I'm struggling with being a parent and any type of stress. I'm now about 30 months off and wondering if any of this stuff is going to improve.

You created some music in all this.....thats pretty amazing. Good stuff too. You're still in there.

Me too...I wake up in the morning and can’t wait to go back to bed

It took me a while to find enjoyment in anything, and then even when I found a few things I enjoyed, I was still hating many things.  I remember the first time I enjoyed a shower, after so long of hating bathing, and not really wanting to bathe.  I think benzos zapped the joy out of so many things for me and some I haven't rediscovered yet, still. 

 

I think it's great that you are enjoying food and sleep.  I didn't enjoy food for YEARS on benzos.  People thought I was anorexic sometimes but looking back, I definitely was having issues because of benzos. 

same. only thing i look forward to