An update on why it’s worth it

I haven’t thought of this site in a while and then did this early a.m. I thought it was time to post why this horrible crap is worth it. I’m nearly 66 years old and was on klonopin for 20 yrs. when I weaned myself off, an 8 month process, I never went back. I suffered through most of what Dr. Ashton, https://www.benzofree.org/info/ashton/, wrote about, as far as possible side effects go. But I stayed with it because I’m older and had discovered the studies that linked benzo use to dementia. I’m not here to argue if those studies hold water or not. I’m old and the thought of dementia or Alzheimer’s scares me. I’ve seen it in my volunteer work and friends. Its not a journey I want to take as I continue to age. The w/d suffering was intense, like experiencing a fatal disease intense. I prayed for death at times. I did the struggle alone and with prayer. No one, but other sufferers, can ever comprehend what happens as our brains heal from the benzo use. It had affected the connection between brain and nervous system dramatically for me, affecting my whole body. All but one issue has fully recovered. I’m grateful I’m stubborn and didn’t want something I put in my mouth controlling me anymore. It became the finest struggle I’ve ever embarked on. I rediscovered me. The me I was prior to the benzo. My mind is alive. My creativity is back. My thirst for life is back. I could go on and on, but I’m more alive now and I couldn’t be more grateful. I’d walk that ferocious hell again because I know the reward is worth it. My diet is all natural. I discovered herbs, yoga, breathing. So many gifts have become a part of my daily life, too many to count. I just want someone, anyone to know what a wonderful thing it is to finally have back control of my brain. To no longer be dulled out, dumbed down by some horrible chemical. The freedom is tremendous. I hope everyone engaged in this struggle gets to have this.

Hi bluetruck

 

This has come at a prescient time for me. I’m thinking of quitting this whole thing. My biggest thing is not being able to work out whether I’m suffering from benzo withdrawal or underlying problems. I was absolutely fine for 6months ish after a hellish acute. But since then I’ve had the worst looping and DP/DR. It’s gone on for 3 months and it’s ALL the time. I mean that absolutely literally.

 

I think I’ve underlying problems. This cannot be PAWS given I was fine straight afterwards for so long.

 

W

Hi bluetruck

Just wanna say thanks so much for taking the time to post. Especially when. You are busy leading a happy life.

It means a lot to us

you made my day with your powerful words! thank you so so much!

I’ve heard people say a break down leads to a break through.  Yep.  It certainly does.  So happy for you ❤️

I just want someone, anyone to know what a wonderful thing it is to finally have back control of my brain. To no longer be dulled out, dumbed down by some horrible chemical. The freedom is tremendous. I hope everyone engaged in this struggle gets to have this.

 

@Bluetruck62

Of course it's definitely worth it though it can be hard to remain hopeful when battling with WD symptoms.

Many thanks for your positive post! I think the forum needed it.

SG

Thank you so much for this post!  It really helps to hear these outcomes.  We all know what we are working for and it is so nice of you to think of those who are still struggling.  Really agree with your comment in your signature that you have lost faith in modern medicine.  Me too! I don't know if I will ever agree to go on anything else ever again 

Hi bluetruck62,

 

I hope you don't mind but I moved your post to Success Stories because it is, thank you so much for coming back and letting us know where you are now and how you got there.

 

Pamster

Great success story  thanks for coming back and sharing

How long did your recovery take?

 

Congratulations!

 

Jim

Hello bluetruck62,

 

Million thanks to you for coming back and sharing your success story. Success stories such as yours help all of us who are still struggling to have hope, patience and faith that healing do happen to us also when the right time comes. Suffering from Benzodiazepine Withdrawal  is the hardest thing we have to go through but like you said, it is worth it.

 

May you continue to receive joy, peace, wellness and love with your newfound life.

 

Blessings!

 

Pi

 

Thank you so much for your success story

 

I need it at the moment ,

 

I am an older lady of 75 and given diazepam when coming up to 73 for anxiety after being tried with sertraline then stopped and the  week of pregabalin and stopped,  I reacted badly to the drug and coming off it ,

 

Now at almost 9 months of and getting no let up yet in symptoms,

 

It gives hope that even when older we still heal , even with horrendous symptoms ,it's possible

 

I am glad you have found breathing and yoga, , What herbs have you found help you ?

 

When did you start to feel better ?

 

I long to be where you are and hope it isn't too far away

 

Best  wishes and congratulations on finding you once more

 

Jen

 

What a fantastic post! Thank you so much for taking the time to share your update and heartfelt reflections on what you have experienced and achieved. I wish you all the best!

Thank you for coming back to write this. BB needed another new success story!

I love that you said" my thirst for life is back".

 

Way to go Bluetruck!

 

Thanks so much for coming back and posting your Success Story!  It means so much to members who are starting down the path of recovery. 

Beautifully said, Bluetruck.  Thank you

Thanks Bluetruck, this gives me hope.