Medium term CT

one month today since my last dose. Didn't know anything about tapering or anything.

Long story but mixed different benzos first infrequently, then frequently, then constantly, for about 6 months in total (hard to be sure exactly as it was mega infrequent at first, but ended up every day low dose march-jun this year.

 

So yesterday was my first pretty decent window of feeling good, only issue was a tiny bit of DR when in the supermarket, and leg twitching when relaxed. The twitching moves around a fair bit but seems to be focussed on my legs atm, mainly my left quad, and a bit in my right calf.

 

Tongue and lips feeling much more normal now and no trouble swallowing. Mentally feeling pretty fine. Didn't sleep good last night (1am-7.30am) and busy stressful day at work today, but overall not too bad today. \

 

hands numbness and tremors etc almost completely gone. Sometimes have a bad spell of 20 mins or whatever especially if i use my phone too much, but apart from that all good

 

Hope everyone is doing OK

 

 

I didn't know I was supposed to taper the drug either and once I went CT I mistakenly thought I only had to get it out of my system, WRONG!  It's rough but I'm glad you had a window, I didn't get many of those so you're lucky.

 

I wonder if your relatively short time of use is one of the reasons you're feeling so well, usually a cold turkey is brutal.  I'm glad to see you're keeping a positive attitude and keeping track of the improvements, I was so negative when I went through this, all I could see was the bad. 

thank you

 

Yeah I am probably sugar coating it a bit (trying to be positive)

 

The first week was hell, I thought i was completely losing the plot. full on DR and overwhelming sadness, couldnt sit still etc. Its gotten gradually better since.

 

Today is the best i've felt in probably 7-8 months so pretty happy with that, and this site has been a big contributor to that

Good for you for trying to put a positive spin on your experience but I can see you've not had a shortage of suffering.  I'm glad though to hear that you feel better than you did even while taking the benzo's, I do too, I have so many gaps in my memory from that time. 

Mental symptoms improving. Almost no DR or Dp. A bit of insomnia but not too bad.

 

Physical coordination improving. Twitches seem to come and go, also achey back but nothing too serious! Sore feet but might be from walking heaps

 

My wife even commented that I seem to be doing much better which is cool to hear as I don’t talk about it a heap, if others are noticing that’s gorta be positive.

 

If I can continue improving at this rate I think by the two month mark I’ll be mostly myself again.

 

Hope everyone else is doing well 

Mental symptoms improving. Almost no DR or Dp. A bit of insomnia but not too bad.

 

Physical coordination improving. Twitches seem to come and go, also achey back but nothing too serious! Sore feet but might be from walking heaps

 

My wife even commented that I seem to be doing much better which is cool to hear as I don’t talk about it a heap, if others are noticing that’s gorta be positive.

 

If I can continue improving at this rate I think by the two month mark I’ll be mostly myself again.

 

Hope everyone else is doing well 

 

This is huge because mostly I hear members say their families just assume they're improving because they give up telling them how awful they feel.  But you not talking much about it and your wife noticing is a validation that you must be improving.  Sometimes we can't see or feel we are because the process has us focusing on the negative so I'm happy to hear this.

another week down, going well i think. odd periods of extreme fatigue, DR, and the odd muscle twitch and weird sensations like lips tingling and trembling a bit, but really minor.

feeling more and more normal. keen for the symptoms to bugger off though as i start panicking i have a serious disease even though rationally i know its the benzo wd

Yep, hypochondria runs rampant around here, our members pretty much keep the medical profession in business with Dr visits, unnecessary tests and treatments.  You sound good though, I'm excited to see your progress. 

Thank you!!

I won't go as far as to say this forums saved my life, but its honestly improved my quality of life by a massive massive margin!

So another mixed bag of a week, few really good days, then few shitty days, bit jumpy, lots of muscle twitching and mega tiredness. Overall net improvement week to week still though

Hey, if you can find a net improvement while experiencing that many symptoms during a few bad days, I'd say you have a great attitude which will serve you well on this journey, good for you! 

had a few days of bad symptoms, but got some great news career wise yesterday (something that I'd been chasing since early 2018) and funny enough not had a single symptom since. I feel like stress/situational anxiety is a massive trigger for symptoms for me, and conversely being happy helps greatly.

 

its interesting how much the brain can affect the body (both good and bad). Fingers crossed this is a nice long window. tomorrow will be 8 weeks since last dose, and 7 weeks since last drink.

You just made my day maccaz, thank you for letting us know what's going on with you!  You're absolutely right, stress is a huge contributor to the intensity of our symptoms, I'm glad you've made the connection.

 

The brain can affect the body, this is why we tell people to distract themselves from their symptoms, it actually works.  Glad to see you're staying away from alcohol, and 2 months since you quit gets you closer to full recovery that you can trust. 

few days of annoying symptoms, i think just related to being over tired. bit of like a cobwebby tight skin feeling down my left arm and right leg. the usual twitches come and go. tired eyes, itchy scalp, itchy arms, the usual. Getting good at just accepting it and trying to ignore it. Anyone else get any of these?

2 months today since last dose. Always seems to be the same, a few days of bad symptoms followed by a few days of none/not much. Main problems atm are muscle twitching, tongue feels a bit funny, bottom lip feels a bit sore and tight and neck pain probably from bad posture (working on it!!)

 

Mentally, I’m heaps improved, in hindsight I was completely mental during the interdose wd, tolerance, and the acute phase. I’m not really getting any DR or DP anymore.

 

Physical symptoms people: how long till the twitching and spasms etc eased up for you?

So good to hear you're doing better mentally, it's pretty eye opening to look back at how we were on the drug, it's scary to know how much power these drugs have. 

 

It sounds like your central nervous system is still pretty sensitized but given you've only been off of the drug for 2 months and you quit cold turkey, I'm super impressed you're feeling as good as you are.

 

I wish I could tell you how long this will last but given your rapid recovery so far, I feel it bodes well for the future. 

Thanks

 

I would say mentally I’m almost 100%, physically probably improved 5% but the main thing is now that I’m mentally feeling good I’m not going down panic rabbit holes and googling every symptom I get. Thanks Pamster 

You're right, when we have the mental symptoms the fear runs rampant, but take those away and you can find ways to deal with the physical ones, I'm happy to hear this. 

Can very happily confirm I am 100% healed mentally. I have no particular anxiety, weird thoughts, insomnia, or anything like that. It is 2 months and 4-5 days since my last dose.

 

I am still having a lot of physical issues that come and go, left forearm/wrist/hand burning, kinda numbness but not, like a cobwebby feeling, similar with right leg, odd muscle twitches all over the place that come and go, mega dry mouth, etc, but I can live with all of those now, as i am not getting into mad panic mentally

so at the 2 month mark i got into a really nice window, for maybe a week or so, barely any if any symptoms.

Since then had a slight wave, for about 4-5 days now with the weird muscle symptoms and bit of numbness and clumsy. Seems to be easing now and headed back to another window fingers crossed.

 

One thing I gotta say to everyone with my limited experience, whenever you are feeling hopeless and like you aren't improving (like me 3 weeks ago), your body can surprise yourself with some sudden improvement, and ultimately you will eventually improve. If i'd truly "known" this previously the sx wouldnt have bothered me much as I would know its only temporary, but a lot easier with benefit of hindsight

 

Today im doing pretty ok

also worth adding, the weird mouth stuff like tingling tongue and lips has gone away pretty much 100%

Just catching up with you maccaz, you sound wonderful, thanks so much for documenting your progress!  Someone who has taken the drug similarly to you will see your posts and find hope in your words. 

Thanks pamster. Been a wave for a few days now with a bit of anxiety and weird buzzing tingling down my right leg with the odd twitch. Overall improving just yeah a crap few days. The buzzing and twitching etc seems to come in waves where I’ll feel it all over my body intermittently in random spots for a few mins then it goes away. No brain fog or dpdr or anything at all tho so I am happy enough. Just gotta keep out of the mental loop that I get in where I think I have a serious neuro disease and it’s not just Benzo. Need to remind myself that multiple doctors have assessed me and confirmed there’s nothing wrong (they say it’s all stress and anxiety related, because they’re not familiar with Benzo issues)

Sure hope those Dr's don't try to prescribe you something for that "stress and anxiety'! 

 

Yep, its the benzo, powerful little pills that can change how your brain functions.  People don't seem to understand that it's not just a matter of getting the drug out of your system, your brain has to knit itself back together again and this takes time.

 

Keep the positive thoughts going, they'll serve you well. 

also worth adding, the weird mouth stuff like tingling tongue and lips has gone away pretty much 100%

 

I have been on BB 8 years now and I have only  met a handful of people who had mouth symptoms. I had this awful, during about the first couple months post CT off a boat load of Klonapin plus Ambien. Itching teeth, itching gums, burning mouth? OMG. I now know this isnt all that unusual but back then I was utterly horrified.

 

I would like to hear more of your story. I no longer spend hours on BB, but I pop in and out and always answer PMs.

annie (east)