Long term use HOPE

I am 18 months off benzo's after 14 years use, I have zero symptoms left and have not had any in over a month, I feel terrible for all of you going through the thick of it right now and I just want to give you some reassurance. I have had weeks of zero sleep, panic, insane thoughts ,chemical anxiety, adrenaline rushes out of nowhere,cortisol rushes, wanting to jump out of my skin, jump out of my car, ideation, morning doom and gloom, bone crushing depression, afraid of everything, apathy, feeling like I could go Insane at any second, brain zaps,strange feelings in my brain, head pressure, tinnitus, dp/dr, malaise, apathy, akathisia, weird mental stuff, could not be around people, always feeling uncomfortable,couldn't remember who I was when I woke up, feeling like this will never end and countless others that I have forgotten , just terrible unbelievable things,  you all know them. It is unbelievable how much we have to suffer, I cried many many times, I just wanted it to go away. I was like many of you , I was 100 % convinced I would never get better but I did, It has taken 18 long months to get to that point, even as little as a month ago I thought that a life of misery was all that I had to look forward to, but I was wrong . All of these terrible symptoms have totally went away. The only thing that got me through it was just hoping and praying to God that tomorrow would be better, HOPE is what kept me alive , don't loose HOPE .

Hey bensanity, thanks so much for writing your story, I know you've been holding off until you were sure but I'm thrilled to hear you're there!  I hope you'll stick around to help reassure those still suffering, you know how much they need to hear this. 

Bensanity...thank you:)

Hi, Did your symptoms go away when you went on Remeron? 

Beware of Remeron because withdrawal can cause horrific insomnia and head pressure. 

 

Congratulations! This gives me a bit of hope. I am almost 15 months off and only about 50% better. I am just glad to be better at all at this point but hearing that not that long ago, you thought things might not be better and now you are helps me to hang on. Thank you for sharing.

Congratulations!!! 17 months is a lifetime in the benzo world. I totally agree that HOPE is what keeps us going and stories like yours gives people HOPE. I know it did for me. I am 14 months free. Its been a crazy ride but it feels so good to feel good. Look at the trees, flowers, see vivid colors again! We are the story tellers to give this behind us HOPE.....

 

Again, congrats...

J

I am so lifted up by your posts.  Thanks so much. 

bensanity, it is so nice to hear that after passing through all those challenging symptoms you are recovered.  Bless you for coming here to share your hope with us!!  I wish you continued peace and joy in your benzo-free life.

 

Best,

 

Kate 

Congratulations Bensanity! Happy for you...hope is a wonderful thing. Sometimes hard to find, but a glimpse of hope can totally change your outlook.

 

B strong

Congratulations Bensanity! Happy for you...hope is a wonderful thing. Sometimes hard to find, but a glimpse of hope can totally change your outlook.

 

B strong

 

Hope was really all I had , just the hope that tomorrow could be better, many times it was and many times it was worse, but the longer this went on the good days outnumbered the bad days until there were no more bad days left.

Thank you Bensanity.  You give me hope today.

I am 17 months off benzo's after 14 years use, I have zero symptoms left and have not had any in over a month, I feel terrible for all of you going through the thick of it right now and I just want to give you some reassurance. I have had weeks of zero sleep, ocd, insane thoughts ,chemical anxiety, adrenaline rushes out of nowhere, wanting to jump out of my skin, jump out of my car, ideation, morning doom and gloom, bone crushing depression, afraid for everything, apathy, feeling like I could go Insane at any second, brain zaps, head pressure,tinnitus,dp/dr,malaise, feeling like this will never end and countless others , just terrible unbelievable things,  you all know them. I was like many of you , I was 100 % convinced I would never get better but I did, It has taken 17 months to get to that point, even as little as a month ago I thought that a life of misery was all that I had to look forward to, but I was wrong . All of these terrible symptoms have totally went away. The only thing that got me through it was just hoping and praying to God that tomorrow could be better, HOPE is what kept me alive , don't loose HOPE .

 

im going through a wild withdrawal right now and this is helping. thank you so much for sharing

I’m glad reading this helps some of you , you will get better and I hope it is soon !

Thank you so much for posting this. I’m at 15 months and still having a rough time. This really gives me hope. So you had very intense symptoms all the way up until 16 months?

 

Thank you and congratulations on making it through and getting your life back.

 

Jim

Did your tinnitus completely disappear?  It has been more than 4 years since I stopped Clonazepam, and I still have tinnitus.  I fear it will never go away. 

Thank you so much Bensanity. I'm currently tapering off of Benzos (Quick Taper). I've been feeling great besides not being able to remember things every now and then. This morning I woke up with a little morning doom and gloom. I knew it was coming due to attempting to taper a few other times. I agree with you. Prayer is very essential during this process.  I know God can do it for all of us. I'm glad that you're well and a testimony for all of us! Thanks again for sharing!

Did your tinnitus completely disappear?  It has been more than 4 years since I stopped Clonazepam, and I still have tinnitus.  I fear it will never go away. 

 

My tinnitus went away also, I hope yours does soon !

Thanks for posting. We need stories like this. Sometimes I just feel like giving up. I have been benzos free for 22 months after a two year taper. I am still very sick. I know there is a.possibility of getting better when I read posts like this.

Hi, Did your symptoms go away when you went on Remeron? 

Beware of Remeron because withdrawal can cause horrific insomnia and head pressure.

So you got off Remeron before benzos?

Wonderful news! Congratulations! And thanks for coming back to tell us about it.

Thank you for letting us know! So happy for you! 

Thanks for writing this. Sometimes I just want to give up. I am a long term user of benzos, about 15 years on Ativan.  I am now 22 months benzo free and still very sick. I am bed or couch bound most of the time.  Right now I have tinnitus and chills as I am typing this.  Also, I am 68 years old and this does not help.  If I could feel better, even a year from now, I could still have a life.  I want to be positive. Posts like yours help.  Thank you for taking the time to do it.  Yes, please stick around here, we need to hear some positive stories.

I really needed to see this. Hope is all I feel I have (just jumped from Klonopin 30 days ago). I hope to someday be able to write a success story and inspire others like you have. I am glad you were able to say you had some good days thrown in there, to keep you going, even before you came this far. Way to go! I will probably return and read this again.

Thank you, Bensanity, for coming back to share your story, and congratulations!  I'm so happy that you're well.

 

Flibberty

I am 17 months off benzo's after 14 years use, I have zero symptoms left and have not had any in over a month, I feel terrible for all of you going through the thick of it right now and I just want to give you some reassurance. I have had weeks of zero sleep, ocd, insane thoughts ,chemical anxiety, adrenaline rushes out of nowhere, wanting to jump out of my skin, jump out of my car, ideation, morning doom and gloom, bone crushing depression, afraid for everything, apathy, feeling like I could go Insane at any second, brain zaps, head pressure,tinnitus,dp/dr,malaise, feeling like this will never end and countless others , just terrible unbelievable things,  you all know them. I was like many of you , I was 100 % convinced I would never get better but I did, It has taken 17 months to get to that point, even as little as a month ago I thought that a life of misery was all that I had to look forward to, but I was wrong . All of these terrible symptoms have totally went away. The only thing that got me through it was just hoping and praying to God that tomorrow could be better, HOPE is what kept me alive , don't loose HOPE .

 

im going through a wild withdrawal right now and this is helping. thank you so much for sharing

 

Just about to start valium taper and so scared.  Are you functional during w/d?