I don’t believe any of this is real anymore.

I already felt like I had fallen through a hole in reality into a parallel universe that I can’t find my way back out of but this virus shot is maki g that feeling much worse.

 

I literally am not sure if I am already dead or have literally fallen in to a parallel universe.

 

Anyone else?

https://www.nytimes.com/2020/03/23/opinion/coronavirus-nature-outdoors.html

Count me in, Ajusta. I feel just as you do. I may be healed from the benzo nightmare, but now I am facing another sort of nightmare. No wonder we feel lost and confused.

You have not fallen into some parallel universe. Just this one, this crazy weird world we live in. We humans have done a good job of wrecking Planet Earth. And now we face a virus that conceivably could wipe ll of us out. It wont, but it sure does feel like that today. I picture God looking at us humans and shaking her head in annoyance. "I created you and look what you have done to the beautiful planet you are on! I sort of wash my habnds of all of you humans."

 

Ajusta, I dont know where you are in recovery. If its year one, all is normal. You have been on BB long enough to know that recovering from this just takes time.

And right now, all of us are facing ANOTHER health crisis. Double whammy.

I am doing what the experts say to do. Isolating myself, which feels quite painful to me, and terribly lonely. But if it saves my life, so be it.

east

https://www.nytimes.com/2020/03/23/opinion/coronavirus-nature-outdoors.html

 

 

Can’t access that but of it is about nature it won’t help as withdrawal has caused me to be phobic pf plants, trees, nature etc.

 

I have loved my garden my whole life and now I have psychotic terror and repulsion of it.

 

I can’t even look at pictures of nature online or on TV.

Count me in, Ajusta. I feel just as you do. I may be healed from the benzo nightmare, but now I am facing another sort of nightmare. No wonder we feel lost and confused.

You have not fallen into some parallel universe. Just this one, this crazy weird world we live in. We humans have done a good job of wrecking Planet Earth. And now we face a virus that conceivably could wipe ll of us out. It wont, but it sure does feel like that today. I picture God looking at us humans and shaking her head in annoyance. "I created you and look what you have done to the beautiful planet you are on! I sort of wash my habnds of all of you humans."

 

Ajusta, I dont know where you are in recovery. If its year one, all is normal. You have been on BB long enough to know that recovering from this just takes time.

And right now, all of us are facing ANOTHER health crisis. Double whammy.

I am doing what the experts say to do. Isolating myself, which feels quite painful to me, and terribly lonely. But if it saves my life, so be it.

east

 

I am re-tapering while being in hell from previous rapid cuts, updoses etc.

 

Holding won’t help as horrific symptoms when dose as well.

 

 

 

 

I'm with you Ajusta. Feeling like the real end of everything, somehow and sometimes feeling it my chance of ending the torture all together.

Yes Ajusta, I felt like I was twilight zoned into a horror movie 31 months ago, now I feel like I have shifted into some dystopian, apocolyptic movie, I guess DR doesn't help with all this

 

That said, those of us here have already dug deep and found our strength and resilience, we are bound to feel very shaken by current events but we can get through this even in our compromised states, we are warriors afterall!  Stay strong and safe everyone!

Ajusta, I feel exactly as you and others on this thread. Alice down the rabbit hole. How could we not, right now?

 

'You [we!] are entirely bonkers. But I'll tell you a secret. All the best people are....' (Alice in Wonderland)

 

I hear you, lovely, and I'm so sorry it's so hard. Sending love and warmth. We'll get through. We will.

 

Take care, everyone.

All a bit surreal at the moment, and having DR at the moment still does not help. Wildflower, I agree all the best people I've met are happily bonkers.  Hope you all are doing ok?

All a bit surreal at the moment, and having DR at the moment still does not help. Wildflower, I agree all the best people I've met are happily bonkers.  Hope you all are doing ok?

 

CyberA, I knew you'd get it...    Hanging on for dear life still. I know you are, too. I'll PM again soon as I have more strength.

https://www.nytimes.com/2020/03/23/opinion/coronavirus-nature-outdoors.html

 

Thank you scrabblegirl. 

My daughter’s a nurse in a Covid19 unit...follow the shelter-at-home guidelines for those on the frontlines. Please.

 

They can’t.

My daughter’s a nurse in a Covid19 unit...follow the shelter-at-home guidelines for those on the frontlines. Please.

 

They can’t.

 

Oh my gosh, Challis! I cant imagine what she and other first-line healthcare professionals are dealing with right now. Wishing her strength, patience, love and protection! And anything else they may need prayers for...

Staying home until all the food runs out!

Thank you, Tator...I’m also staying home. It’s so important to keep the healthcare system in operation.

So true. Don't want to tax the healthcare system for than it already is. Boyfriend and I went driving last week and I saw a (edit) *reckless motorcyclist almost get hit and it make me think of exactly what you said. Now is the time to be careful and safe and stay home and not expose oneself to all the possible dangers out there. Hospitals are dealing with more than enough right now.

Thankfully, with the internet we have access to so much to keep ourselves busy. Speaking of, I think I will go find a yoga class online.

Well wishes to everyone to stay safe and please stay at home unless it is absolutely necessary.

Count me in, Ajusta. I feel just as you do. I may be healed from the benzo nightmare, but now I am facing another sort of nightmare. No wonder we feel lost and confused.

You have not fallen into some parallel universe. Just this one, this crazy weird world we live in. We humans have done a good job of wrecking Planet Earth. And now we face a virus that conceivably could wipe ll of us out. It wont, but it sure does feel like that today. I picture God looking at us humans and shaking her head in annoyance. "I created you and look what you have done to the beautiful planet you are on! I sort of wash my habnds of all of you humans."

 

Ajusta, I dont know where you are in recovery. If its year one, all is normal. You have been on BB long enough to know that recovering from this just takes time.

And right now, all of us are facing ANOTHER health crisis. Double whammy.

I am doing what the experts say to do. Isolating myself, which feels quite painful to me, and terribly lonely. But if it saves my life, so be it.

east

 

I am re-tapering while being in hell from previous rapid cuts, updoses etc.

 

Holding won’t help as horrific symptoms when dose as well.

 

 

 

Ajusta: I was also a bit confused and misunderstood as this is "post-withdrawal".

 

Maybe you get more help and support in "withdrawal support.” (during your taper).

 

Just for help and a suggestion! 

I am "sheltering at home" now. And hate it! Dislike being cooped up inside, but here in Florida its already SO hot one doesnt want to go outside. I sat down this morning and wrote out a long list of all the small or big chores I have been avoiding for a long time, because in the next month I should have a LOT of time to get them all done.

 

And I also decided to again pursue a Nursing job, because I feel obligated to try to join ranks with all the other medical people out there, risking their lives to save others. Yeah, I know. Crazy. But this is n[-how medical people feel. It is out way of giving back.

 

But my cat, Bear, is thrilled I am at home more now. He is one happy little camper. He is a cat who makes a lot of demands, and can be annoying this way. But he is also good company, his small densely furred body is soft to touch, and his face is that of an angel. Huge eyes which do make eye contact. I feel so grateful that he chose me!

Annie

Count me in, Ajusta. I feel just as you do. I may be healed from the benzo nightmare, but now I am facing another sort of nightmare. No wonder we feel lost and confused.

You have not fallen into some parallel universe. Just this one, this crazy weird world we live in. We humans have done a good job of wrecking Planet Earth. And now we face a virus that conceivably could wipe ll of us out. It wont, but it sure does feel like that today. I picture God looking at us humans and shaking her head in annoyance. "I created you and look what you have done to the beautiful planet you are on! I sort of wash my habnds of all of you humans."

 

Ajusta, I dont know where you are in recovery. If its year one, all is normal. You have been on BB long enough to know that recovering from this just takes time.

And right now, all of us are facing ANOTHER health crisis. Double whammy.

I am doing what the experts say to do. Isolating myself, which feels quite painful to me, and terribly lonely. But if it saves my life, so be it.

east

 

I am re-tapering while being in hell from previous rapid cuts, updoses etc.

 

Holding won’t help as horrific symptoms when dose as well.

 

 

 

Ajusta: I was also a bit confused and misunderstood as this is "post-withdrawal".

 

Maybe you get more help and support in "withdrawal support.” (during your taper).

 

Just for help and a suggestion! 

 

 

I thought O had put this in the Chewing the Fat section.

 

I can hardly remember my own name half the time.