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Healed & loving life again


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I jumped in 2017 and I wanna say a little over a year is when everything started becoming normal again. It was hard & I frequently compared my story and progress to everyone else’s . Like “they took exactly 12 months, so I should feel better in 12 months” or those success of 3/4 months killed me when I didn’t feel better by then .

But honestly everyone’s Journey is unique . It took a lot of work! But I’m so glad to where I am, I’m so glad everything got better and I’m so glad I didn’t give up .

 

I won’t lie. I still get panic attacks, tinnitus, derealization BUT!! I’ve worked so hard at using techniques and realizing that a lot of those symptoms came from fear and stress that when I feel it I don’t get so worked up. I tell myself it’s because I’m stressed, or to much caffeine or not enough sleep and laugh it off and it goes away. I promise it gets better .

 

  :smitten::thumbsup:

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Hi Lovelyduck31,

 

Thanks so much for writing a success story, I used to read them over and over so I know how important they are.  I'm happy to hear you're doing so well and how you've found other tools to get you through the challenging times. 

 

Pamster  :smitten:

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Thanks for posting your success story. I begin my taper on Mar 1st.

 

Reading through all these success stories and the journeys people have taken has given me hope.

 

Congrats on getting off the benzo!  :)

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Lovelyduck -

 

Thank you for posting your Success Story. and for being so frank about how you've learned to deal with stress & anxiety.  Your story will give hope and encouragement to more people in the depths of despair - more than you'll ever know!

 

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Hello Lovelyduck,

 

Congratulations to you! Thank you for posting your Success Story so that others can find hope and light for their future wellness.

 

It sounds like you are living life and finding ways to deal with stress, good for you.

 

pianogirl  :smitten:

 

 

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Thank you very much for sharing your healing story lovelyduck, that's wonderful that you made it through this nightmare!!! do you mind sharing how long you you took benzos for and what the dose was?
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I took alprazolam(Xanax) 1mg divided three times a day for about 5 months(11/2016-03/2017)and then started tapering and jumped off 5 months after that (jumped off 08/2017)
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Thank you for letting us know about your success.

May I ask when your depression lifted? That's the worst symptom I have which prevents me to find hope somedays and to enjoy life. It started early in withdrawal and have several strong bouts of depression (depresive spells) multiple times a day, except when I'm in a window.

 

I would really like to know how you managed it and the timeline associated with this symptom  :)

 

Also for the panic attacks I guess the longer you stay out of medicines, the longer it will be between 2 panic attacks until they totally vanished. Mine turned from full blown panic attack to limited panic attacks (= less than 4 symptoms related to panic attacks). I'm still having the feeling that I'm dying but only for a few seconds instead of hours :P

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Well done!

 

Can I ask if your name came from trying to learn French via Duo Lingo?

 

Before WD I was doing g that and there was a sentence

 

‘Tu as un jolie canard’ that always made me laugh.

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Congrats on sticking it out and feeling better. Xanax is such a rough one to come off of. It's tough thinking about time lost to the vileness of benzos, but you're young enough that you have most of your life ahead of you.
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I won’t lie. I still get panic attacks, tinnitus, derealization BUT!! I’ve worked so hard at using techniques and realizing that a lot of those symptoms came from fear and stress that when I feel it I don’t get so worked up. I tell myself it’s because I’m stressed, or to much caffeine or not enough sleep and laugh it off and it goes away. I promise it gets better .

 

I love what you said!!! Well done!!!

 

Thanks so much!!! :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup:

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@Skalliz

The depression was BAD . I never went out I cried every day all day and never understood why this was happening . I still get bouts of depression but my boyfriend (who was there for me beginning to end and always validated what I went through was real) takes me back and makes me realize how much progress I’ve made and my deression isn’t so bad compared to what I went through . I literally thought I had every deadly disease known to man, use to think I was having a stroke/ or anything deadly . I was in and out of the er over 100 times . Withdrawal is killer but honestly some progress is better then none

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Also, yes the panic attacks are very quick now . I feel like my heart is gonna burst and then I’m like you know what I’m just gonna do something that would get my heart racing anyways so at least it seems like I have a reason .

 

Honestly it’s all physical pain , majority of it, but our minds play so many tricks on us and the mind is just so powerful .

 

Don’t ever let anyone tell you this is all in your head, I know I sound like I’m contradicting myself but I’m not . Our mind and body manifest these symptoms but they are real physical Pain- were just not actually dying like we think we are .

 

Sorry I know it’s a bit confusing to explain . Hopefully you guys understand what I mean lol

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Oh and y’all !

I had the WORST health anxiety, I mean I could get a headache and though I had an aneurism or my chest would hurt and I thought I was having a heart attack or a blood clot (I saw so many specialist and had over 12 MRIs in one year) and my health anxiety IS GONEEEEE . I get a headache? Eh I pop some Tylenol and I’m chill .

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Lovelyduck,

 

Thanks for your post, it’s inspiring and I love the sense of humor. I can’t wait to be where you are. I suffer heart palpitations in my sleep every night, it sucks a lot. I don’t panic as much anymore but I’ve had my husband and family record video messages for me so I can watch them on repeat whenever I feel panicky or anxious. The tinnitus is also an issue, I hope yours also stops completely soon. Keep being awesome young lady! Nice to chat to someone younger on here, I’m 34y female :-)

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