Came back to offer hope...

Good evening, all,

 

I posted on here last year as Fish and Ship. It was quite a ride for awhile, and I came back because a doctor asked me if I wanted to take some valium for a neck spasm I've been having, and I said, "Don't you remember all I went through last year with Ambien and Ativan?" He said, "Well, it wasn't THAT bad." I swear, I wanted to punch him! But I said instead, "Can you recommend an alternative to a benzo?" He gave me flexeril....

 

So I was thinking about my misery and the fact that I DID survive and wondering how I got through it, and I thought about you who are here now and suffering. It feels like a lonely place during withdrawals, and no one can get in your head and really understand the hell of it, except maybe other benzo buddies. They happened to save my sanity. I remember listening to lots of ambient music on YouTube like Marconi Union Endless and Dr. Jeffery Thompson. I remember using muscle rubs on my poor stiff neck and staying awake three or more nights in a row, and watching that nice lady on YouTube with the BenzoBrain channel telling me I'd survive. I joined all the Facebook pages and read how others coped, and mainly just waited it out.

 

I prayed A LOT. I kept a journal. I drew. No medicines really lessened it for me, but there may be something that works for YOU. I lost weight. Way too much weight for my 5'11" frame. I've gained back my weight and then some. I have gained back my muscle and added more muscle. I still don't drink coffee, but I did start back on tea a few months ago and am doing fine. I lift weights, run, walk, laugh, and sleep now.

 

You will, too. Don't give up, no matter how dark it is right now. You are here for a reason. You will get through and look back from the other side. Do whatever it takes right now to be kind to yourself. Love to you all.

 

L.B.

Hi LB,

 

So happy for you! Wow, such great news that you built back your muscle! Thats one of the damages i feel very sad about-loss of my very lean and firm muscle.

 

 

Love all you wrote, especially the punching part 

 

Well, i started valium for back injury caused neck and back contraction or spasm ended up from a normal back patient to a non human benzo crap with insane contraction and spasm allover head to toe plus millon others.

 

The back injury was very bad but over time it is healing without treatment only sucked by the back treatment now.

 

Do you think the neck spasm is somehow related to benzo you used? Regardless, it will heal by itself even there is a physical cause, definitely will be better off from all drugs if it is indeed benzo related.

 

Somehow i feel all these muscle relaxants do things to the brain. Please check it out see how it works.

 

 

This is a great to hear, yes I am suffering immensely.  But it is going to pass.  I too have no Doctors who believe me.  But I found BB and once I realized I was not crazy, this is real and excepted that this is happening I don't know how but I will get through this.  Thank you for sharing 💜✌️🙏

 

B

What sort of mental symptoms did you deal with?

 

It looks as though you dealt with insomnia and stiff muscles.

Thanks for coming back to share 

Thank you for the hope. How long did it take for your to come out on the other side? How long to gain back the weight and muscles? Were you working all through? How long had you taken the benzos for?

Thanks I really needed that, last weeks been hell. Stand strong

Thank you so much for giving me Hope today.  🙏💜✌️

LB! Hi friend! I think corresponding with you several months ago saved me! Thank you so much for your emails. I'm so glad to hear you're doing better

 

I still have some lingering symptoms from BWD (I'm fully functional but I wouldn't say that I'm 100% recovered yet). I'm now tapering my Sertraline (ugh!) so I'm still on this board. I like it better than Surviving Antidepressants LOL. I'll consider myself fully healed when I'm off all meds and no longer have symptoms.

 

Thanks again for giving us an update!