Jump to content

It's been 28 months since my C/T and I still haven't seen any memory improvement


[He...]

Recommended Posts

Is it unusual that I havent seen any improvement in my memory at all? I can barely remember what I did 5 minutes ago, much less what I did yesterday or last week. Is this a medication withdrawal symptom that I can expect to be permanent or does it eventually improve? Success stories and feedback for this issue are welcome!
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Very normal. at 28 days you are still a babe in the woods. Are you having other wd symptoms? How are you doing overall?

east

 

Hi Eastcoast,

 

I think you read my post wrong, it's been 28 months, not 28 days. Overall, I'm sleeping better, I get around 5 hours of broken sleep per night which is different from the 2 to 3 hours I was getting on average for the first 18 months. I still have difficulty with my concentration that I think has actually gotten a little bit worse in the last 6 months than even the first 6 months. My double vision has started getting worse (I'm very concerned about this because I can't seem to find anyone else on the forum that experiences this), I have chronic dry eye. I still have panic attacks between once to twice per week (I used to have these once every 2 to 3 years before meds), and I have debilitating depression. There are plenty of others but these are the major disruptive symptoms. I feel like I've been on this journey for so long and I'm so scared that it seems like I've made little to no progress. Especially in relation to my memory and concentration. I guess none of us ever truly get back to the state that we were in premedication use. Thanks for checking in Eastcoast, as always, you're the best.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Very normal. at 28 days you are still a babe in the woods. Are you having other wd symptoms? How are you doing overall?

east

 

Hi Eastcoast,

 

I think you read my post wrong, it's been 28 months, not 28 days. Overall, I'm sleeping better, I get around 5 hours of broken sleep per night which is different from the 2 to 3 hours I was getting on average for the first 18 months. I still have difficulty with my concentration that I think has actually gotten a little bit worse in the last 6 months than even the first 6 months. My double vision has started getting worse (I'm very concerned about this because I can't seem to find anyone else on the forum that experiences this), I have chronic dry eye. I still have panic attacks between once to twice per week (I used to have these once every 2 to 3 years before meds), and I have debilitating depression. There are plenty of others but these are the major disruptive symptoms. I feel like I've been on this journey for so long and I'm so scared that it seems like I've made little to no progress. Especially in relation to my memory and concentration. I guess none of us ever truly get back to the state that we were in premedication use. Thanks for checking in Eastcoast, as always, you're the best.

 

Sorry, I also forgot to mention the constant DP/DR and anhedonia.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hell, excuse my error. I am only on BB maybe an hour a day, after a long day at work. But despite this, I do stand by my answer. Forsome reason, some people are just prone to have really long, bad withdrawals. I was one of them. And no one really knows why.

I went through a wd very similar to you. Way too long, and I truly thought I would not even survive it. I just existed. A pitiful brain which didn't really understand a darn thing that was happening to me My depression was very deep. I honestly thought I had gone nuts, insane, looney tunes. I simply could NOT believe my "beloved" benzos were causing all of that stuff.

But they were.

Hell, I know you have been struggling for a while. My heart goes out to you. I walked in those shoes, 7 long years ago.

For some reason, some people are just slow to heal. I sure was. But I DID heal, and so will you. You have to just try and do some of the stuff people on BB suggest to you. There are ways to cope with your onslaught of various weird symptoms. Small easy things to do.

For me, what I call "faking it" worked the best over time. I FORCED myself to fake it that I felt a lot better than I really did. I faked being optimistic. I have always (prior to this) been a fairly negative person who only saw/felt the negative side of things. During my wd, I faked it and faked it, just hoping it was going to work, like my old therapist told me it would.

It sure did, but I had to wait several years, during that time I just kept faking it, especially here on BB. BB was my LIFELINE back then! Without BB I would not be alive now. I know that.

What happened is my real story. Over time, faking it actually changed how my brain SAW things. Once I healed, I found myself to BE a positive person, a woman who is no longer depressed or anxious, and my self esteem is on the PLUS side now. ALL of this due to getting off benzos and faking it.

Keep on going, soldier. You will get there.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

×
×
  • Create New...