Losing hope. Help me please.

Hey guys,

I'm losing hope in this never-ending battle with the benzo. I'm so afraid of losing everybody and everything I have because they will eventually work out that I'm taking these awful drugs which I thought were supposed to help me with my anxiety.

Dave.  :'(

 

Hi Dave how are you doing? I totally relate to you, it’s so hard. Sending you big hugs from the other side of Adelaide.

I relate too, seems like a lot of us are right here with you right now. Feeling these feelings and living through this. I hope so much that we can all pull through together.

 

I understand how painful it is. I'm there too.

 

Hoping it gets better soon, that we all have some days that we can use to gain a momentum of personal strength and strength for the group.

 

 

Yeah, it's a hell of a thing to go through and a lot of people don't know what you are even talking about. But I can assure you, we do here. Even a lot of doctors - just today I went to the cardiologist for tests and was waiting a couple of results (not necessarily hoping one way or the other) - how one result would be favorable over the over - I wouldn't know. But I explained my situation with the Benzos ordeal. Dr. asked me "what's benzos"? I said "Benzodiazapines" Dr. asked was that for fun or what? I said "no, their not fun, not even close!" Those pills are the shittiest little bargains you could ever make. Wish I had know.

We must remember A Dr. gave us these pills We trusted they knew what was best for us they are not illegal drugs they are still given so We have nothing to be ashamed of We were not taking street drugs We were trying to get better Don't be ashamed if someone does find out You are fighting to get off of them they should champion Your effort

Yes, you should not be ashamed at all.

 

But there is a stigma, that is for sure.  And that is why so many people lose so much I think.

 

Hey where is the other side of Adelaide?    You both in Adelaide?

Yes, you should not be ashamed at all.

 

But there is a stigma, that is for sure.  And that is why so many people lose so much I think.

 

Hey where is the other side of Adelaide?    You both in Adelaide?

Hey there,

I'm in the Eastern suburbs of Adelaide.

Dave. 

This battle is YOURS, and only you know the story behind it. People who really care about you will stay..I have very few close friends and they know I am battling through this, I rather tell them.. if some people don't understand that is not your business, life is life, and some of us aren't that lucky to have a "perfect life".

much love

Blossom

We must remember A Dr. gave us these pills We trusted they knew what was best for us they are not illegal drugs they are still given so We have nothing to be ashamed of We were not taking street drugs We were trying to get better Don't be ashamed if someone does find out You are fighting to get off of them they should champion Your effort

so true!!!!

Yes well I found NOBODY cared for me.  That is hard to take in but is the case.

 

Dave, I have a skype friend in Mt. Barker.  Do you know Mt. Barker?  I hope I get well enough to see her before I shuffle off the planet.  I don't know what the odds are I'll get there... gee you are only 8100 miles away, or something.

 

 

Yes well I found NOBODY cared for me.  That is hard to take in but is the case.

 

Dave, I have a skype friend in Mt. Barker.  Do you know Mt. Barker?  I hope I get well enough to see her before I shuffle off the planet.  I don't know what the odds are I'll get there... gee you are only 8100 miles away, or something.

Hi Barbara,

I'm so sorry you feel that no-one cared for you. Remember I wrote this during a pretty bad "wave" though.

I think in retrospect, I tapered too quick yet again. I'm going to hold this time, as much as it pains me to do. I need to stabilise on my dose and haven't done so yet. I paid the price.

 

Yes I know the suburb of Mount Barker. It is in the Adelaide Hills region, about an hour's drive from where I live actually.

It's a nice area, I have never been there but I have driven close to Mt. Barker when I was learning to drive. My driving instructor lived just outside of Uraidla/Summertown at the foot of the Adelaide Hills, and he would often take me past there to ease my driving anxiety. It was a shame he left driver tutoring after that. We became very close mates, even though he was nearing 70 and I'm only in my early 30's. He was a driving examiner for close to 30 years. I have him to thank for my impressive and clean driving skills.

I bought a car very similar to the one I learnt to drive in to bring back memories of my driving experience with my instructor.

Dave. 

Hey guys,

I haven't responded to this post for a very long time, but I would like to thank everyone for their well wishes, and just to let you know, I am doing sooo much better since this post!

Probably 60% there, still a way to go, but I can already see some improvements.

Dave.