Protracted healer

Thanks so much for coming back and posting this.  Sorry for all you went through, but happy to hear you have healed.

Hi Brighterdays,

 

Did you suffer from dementia symptoms? If you did, did they get better and how are they today?

I'm suffering form all the cognitive symptoms: severe memory impairment, planning difficulty, reasoning difficulty, mental fatigue, etc. and wondering if you suffered the same.

 

All the best,

Taylor

 

If you look up Traumatized80 in the me,bets list you will be able to find the list of symptoms she had.

Hi Brighterdays,

 

Did you suffer from dementia symptoms? If you did, did they get better and how are they today?

I'm suffering form all the cognitive symptoms: severe memory impairment, planning difficulty, reasoning difficulty, mental fatigue, etc. and wondering if you suffered the same.

 

All the best,

Taylor

 

is "me,bets list" a typo or do I put me,bets into the search box?

I will try traumatized 80 in the search box and see what happens.

Thanks.

 

If you look up Traumatized80 in the me,bets list you will be able to find the list of symptoms she had.

 

Edit for add'l info:

I couldn't find traumatized80 through the search engine so I couldn't find her symptoms list. Don't know what to do.

Couldn't find her either

Couldn't find her either

 

Thanks for trying.

Couldn't find her either

 

Thanks for trying.

 

Here it is....

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=175810.msg2336235#msg2336235

Does anyone else still have waves of nerve pain, mainly in weak area's of your body? I've been off xanax for close to 5 years after only a year of low dose. Seem to have more allergic reactions also. Thanks for any input.

Couldn't find her either

 

Thanks for trying.

 

Here it is....

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=175810.msg2336235#msg2336235

 

Thank you! I really appreciate your sleuthing! She really was in a horrible spot, and I find great hope in her recovery.

I have been thrown back into fear of dementia and never being normal again. Today I was feeling overwhelmingly that I was going to be dead within the year. I thought I would move to Oregon so I can have a physician-assisted suicide if I should need it.

I am suffering from dementia symptoms as are listed in substance-induced dementia.

However, they only started after my withdrawal from clonazepam so they aren't pre-existing or just natural part of aging. I am 46.

I have to keep praying that they will go away as our brains are neuro-plastic.

I have been overwhelmed with fear of permanent damage, like everyone else here, and at 28 months out it feels it could last forever or get worse.

I feel I don't have much longer to live.

The dementia symptoms are just so bad.

Its no way to live and I feel so isolated from humanity.

 

Couldn't find her either

 

Thanks for trying.

 

Here it is....

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=175810.msg2336235#msg2336235

 

Thank you! I really appreciate your sleuthing! She really was in a horrible spot, and I find great hope in her recovery.

I have been thrown back into fear of dementia and never being normal again. Today I was feeling overwhelmingly that I was going to be dead within the year. I thought I would move to Oregon so I can have a physician-assisted suicide if I should need it.

I am suffering from dementia symptoms as are listed in substance-induced dementia.

However, they only started after my withdrawal from clonazepam so they aren't pre-existing or just natural part of aging. I am 46.

I have to keep praying that they will go away as our brains are neuro-plastic.

I have been overwhelmed with fear of permanent damage, like everyone else here, and at 28 months out it feels it could last forever or get worse.

I feel I don't have much longer to live.

The dementia symptoms are just so bad.

Its no way to live and I feel so isolated from humanity.

 

How do you know she healed? Read she was pregnant during w/d. Another member just posted about being Pregnant. I couldn't imagine.

Couldn't find her either

 

Thanks for trying.

 

Here it is....

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=175810.msg2336235#msg2336235

 

Thank you! I really appreciate your sleuthing! She really was in a horrible spot, and I find great hope in her recovery.

I have been thrown back into fear of dementia and never being normal again. Today I was feeling overwhelmingly that I was going to be dead within the year. I thought I would move to Oregon so I can have a physician-assisted suicide if I should need it.

I am suffering from dementia symptoms as are listed in substance-induced dementia.

However, they only started after my withdrawal from clonazepam so they aren't pre-existing or just natural part of aging. I am 46.

I have to keep praying that they will go away as our brains are neuro-plastic.

I have been overwhelmed with fear of permanent damage, like everyone else here, and at 28 months out it feels it could last forever or get worse.

I feel I don't have much longer to live.

The dementia symptoms are just so bad.

Its no way to live and I feel so isolated from humanity.

 

How do you know she healed? Read she was pregnant during w/d. Another member just posted about being Pregnant. I couldn't imagine.

 

The assumption is she healed because this her success story thread. If you look back at her original post she writes how much better she is doing. She thanks everyone for their continuous support.

She also said she persevered because of her dedication to her son. He kept her going in her darkest times which lasted many years.

I personally cannot imagine going through pregnancy during this, but we humans can endure the most tragic and insane things because of hope and love.

Bump...

i know i wont get a reply. we had so much in common except a few things. your family never left you. mine did. said i should just think happy thoughts and choose joy. when the aacute started ibwas expected to throw a baby shower. while i burned and was psychotic. i couldnt make a  sandwich. my family said to just try more meds and basically rhey couldnt be bothered with me. my husabnd couldnt watch me 24 7. then i was dumped and shuffled and abandoned for the next 4months. now i have all of the trauma to grt over but indontnknow how. the intrusice thoughts to get oce4 but indont know how. the attempts to get over but indont know how. like im stuck in a crevice in hell. cant go back cant go forqard. wish i couldbhave bren perfect like you through this. wish id had protection like you. wish i hadnt lost every bit ifbwhi i was. i know you wont read this. youre long gone. living a life ny kids mom doesnt get to have again. i cant believe this.

Edit: Content

wow. i wish i could have been as strong as this lady. my brain is so dead and ove had the cops h3re so many times bc i talked to anyone who would listen. i dont think there is a point anymore. life seems a little too messed up now. maybe its the damage. who knows. glad she healed. my kid will be a junior in highs chool by the time i heal i guess

Hi boy mom,

 

Oh my goodness, my heart goes out to you. You have been through hell and have really seen the dark side of people. People who society says should be our greatest support through time of crises. But there never is any guarantee. We have to do the best we can to survive this hell, one day at a time, and promise ourselves that we will one day find people who are truly there for us. In the meantime, we have to be that support for ourselves. We have to do whatever it takes to live through another day. Because it may not feel like it now, but you will improve and you will be able to build yourself a new life. I don't know how long it will take for you. I am a little over three years since cold-turkey and I still have a lot of healing to do, but I am slowly building up myself again.

 

My parents are dead and my three half-brothers have only ignored me, with one brother and his wife outwardly shunning me. I have done nothing to deserve this it is just that they are ignorant and do not have any compassion for people with mental health issues. They have zero understanding that these medications are the cause of our health problems. They suppress and hide our root cause issues and they wreak havoc on our bodies and brains.

 

Stay the course and get whatever help you can as your are in crisis right now. Support groups, hotlines, meet-up groups, holistic health practitioners. YOU ARE NOT ALONE. You WILL get better and you just have to hang on tight and let time allow your body to heal.

I am so sorry you saw your family for who they truly are: scared and overwhelmed. They are human and humans can be very cruel.

 

One thing I learned is that I had to unattached any expectations to my "family." This has made me very sad but it has also set me free.

 

I want you to hang on tight, know that you are loved beyond measure, there are people out there feeling the pain and loneliness of this like you, and we must all come together to keep each other alive and supported. One day I hope we can all pay it forward and help others who will unfortunately go through it, too.

 

I hope you can get the support you need from BB right now until you start feeling better. Lean on everyone here as much as you can.

Feel free to DM me!!!

 

Tater

 

thanks. yeah this lady who wrote this is one tough customer. She should write a book....a blueprint for handling the worst thing anyone, especially a young mom has gone through. if i make it one day i will. the trauma and the awful mistakes i have made may just smothering my flame out

I wanted to pop in quickly and say it took me 6 years to heal. I was on here under a different name for several years. Traumatized80. I was the most horrific case I had ever seen. I was poly drugged after 1 panick attack. I spent 14 months in and out of a psych ward, temporarily lost my nursing career, gave birth with over 150 sx and so much more. I can't honestly go into such detail because its caused severe PTSD.  I was in SEVERE acute withdrawal/brain damage for 3.5 years. I spent 90 percent of my days screaming I'm agony and clinging to anyone that would tell me I would survive. In my eyes I am a walking miracle right now.. anyone that knows my story will vouch for me.  After 4.5 years I was still very debilitated but was able to return to work 2 days a week. I spent the next 1.5 years slowwwwwwwly healing and never believing that some of the remaining acute like symptoms would go away.  This is why I wanted to come on and briefly say I am doing okay. I know some of you answered my messages every single day an old pretty much kept me alive in my darkest times.  I believe there is a list of my symptoms posted under my old name.  I hope this gives some of you some comfort.  I also believe that we must look at other causes. I believe the drugs were just the last nail in the coffin for me.  I had toxic breast implants, metal filling ect.  Once I had the implants removed and the mental out of my mouth I began to heal rapidly.  However, I do not want anyone to read this and assume all of my issues were from them.. I had the implants and fillings fir more than 15 years and my symptoms did NOT occur until the doctors poisoned me.  However, I believe the over load on my system having had these things plus the drugs caused a cascade if events.  I wish you all the best.  If I can recover.. anyone can recover... I remained off ALL drugs and let my brain and nervous system repair itself. The body and brain have an anate ability to heal theirselves. I'm proof

yay. i hope to find the kind of support you did! congrats

hey brighter. what do you mean if it was in fact the drugs that caused your damage? any advice for how to deal with trauma from symtpoms and the "care"?

I have had several personal messages and thought it would be best to reply here.  One of the questions I get is how did i make it through this when I was one of the worst cases on here or anywhere really.  Well I was determined to NEVER let big pharma win and I had a beautiful little boy that needed his momma... wven if i couldnt care for him or really engage at all..I knew he neded me and i had to get well for him.  I endured SEVERE toxic brain damage, 150 sx , pregnancy, lose of my entire life..spent 3 years in my home.. almost lost my husband as his family begged him to leave me and take our child.  I lost both of my parents to death and still fought HARD!!!  Was diagnosed with  C. and still fought.  I had my breast implants out and started healing pretty quick after.  I was poly drugged tortured and mislead by every doctor Ive ever come in contact with!  That is why I am now in grad school to be a nurse practitioner. I want to help those like me that were left to die with noone but a few select friends and my mom, until her death.  Total I am still left with electric surging in my head that comes and goes in intensity.  It is NOTHING like it was and I am able to live fully.  I had a set back last December after drinking a glass of wine .. I never believed this could happen until it happened to me... with a combo of that and removal of my last mercury filling.. I was set back pretty bad for 4 months.  Electric surging 10/10 chronic crawling out of my skin anxiety, shakes, chills, rat poison anguish ect. It resolved At the end of April and I am been better than I was before the set back... My words to anyone is... never ever take a single day for granted.  Dont trust doctors... they are not God... God bless you all!

I have had several personal messages and thought it would be best to reply here.  One of the questions I get is how did i make it through this when I was one of the worst cases on here or anywhere really.  Well I was determined to NEVER let big pharma win and I had a beautiful little boy that needed his momma... wven if i couldnt care for him or really engage at all..I knew he neded me and i had to get well for him.  I endured SEVERE toxic brain damage, 150 sx , pregnancy, lose of my entire life..spent 3 years in my home.. almost lost my husband as his family begged him to leave me and take our child.  I lost both of my parents to death and still fought HARD!!!  Was diagnosed with  C. and still fought.  I had my breast implants out and started healing pretty quick after.  I was poly drugged tortured and mislead by every doctor Ive ever come in contact with!  That is why I am now in grad school to be a nurse practitioner. I want to help those like me that were left to die with noone but a few select friends and my mom, until her death.  Total I am still left with electric surging in my head that comes and goes in intensity.  It is NOTHING like it was and I am able to live fully.  I had a set back last December after drinking a glass of wine .. I never believed this could happen until it happened to me... with a combo of that and removal of my last mercury filling.. I was set back pretty bad for 4 months.  Electric surging 10/10 chronic crawling out of my skin anxiety, shakes, chills, rat poison anguish ect. It resolved At the end of April and I am been better than I was before the set back... My words to anyone is... never ever take a single day for granted.  Dont trust doctors... they are not God... God bless you all!

 

Thank you for coming back and updating us. I look to your story to give me hope and the courage to continue on. I lost my mom during all of this and many other losses (boyfriend, friends), people I never thought would leave. I'm trying so hard to pick up the pieces to my  life at 20 months off but then get slammed again and think...what am I fighting for? But I have four kids that I am trying to hold on for. Best of luck in your NP program. You will help so many!

Thank you. Your story is encouraging.

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=127018.msg1684426#msg1684426

Your story is so encouraging and I commend your sheer willpower and strength. It is worth it to keep fighting. You never know what is in the other end of the fight! it could be a new amazing life. A life dedicated t help others.

So inspiring!

I have had several personal messages and thought it would be best to reply here.  One of the questions I get is how did i make it through this when I was one of the worst cases on here or anywhere really.  Well I was determined to NEVER let big pharma win and I had a beautiful little boy that needed his momma... wven if i couldnt care for him or really engage at all..I knew he neded me and i had to get well for him.  I endured SEVERE toxic brain damage, 150 sx , pregnancy, lose of my entire life..spent 3 years in my home.. almost lost my husband as his family begged him to leave me and take our child.  I lost both of my parents to death and still fought HARD!!!  Was diagnosed with  C. and still fought.  I had my breast implants out and started healing pretty quick after.  I was poly drugged tortured and mislead by every doctor Ive ever come in contact with!  That is why I am now in grad school to be a nurse practitioner. I want to help those like me that were left to die with noone but a few select friends and my mom, until her death.  Total I am still left with electric surging in my head that comes and goes in intensity.  It is NOTHING like it was and I am able to live fully.  I had a set back last December after drinking a glass of wine .. I never believed this could happen until it happened to me... with a combo of that and removal of my last mercury filling.. I was set back pretty bad for 4 months.  Electric surging 10/10 chronic crawling out of my skin anxiety, shakes, chills, rat poison anguish ect. It resolved At the end of April and I am been better than I was before the set back... My words to anyone is... never ever take a single day for granted.  Dont trust doctors... they are not God... God bless you all!

would you mind sharing with all of us if you found any kind of ptsd therapy helpful and if so would you share which kind? And perhaps how you forgave others for turning their backs on you and if you faced this, saying cruel things. and if you had any issues with anger and self forgiveness? i know this is something many of us struggle with. thank you and God bless.

bds can you please just tell me when it stops hurting

did you have issues with anger and knowing who you truly were? does that make sense? how did you heal emotionally?

How were your cognitive symptoms? Debilitating headaches?