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How Long?


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I have been going absolutely insane lately and I wanted to ask a few questions if anyone wishes to respond.

 

How long do you plan on waiting to heal? I hear of many people so many years out (even up to 15+) that are still suffering. How do you do it month after month and year after year? Is it the hope that everyone heals or is it the alternative that scares you too much to end the suffering.  Family/Friends etc?  Are the symptoms debilitating all that time?  I couldn't imagine living in a constant state of terror for years on end.  There is absolutely no point to being alive.

 

I know I am only 7 months out buy my mental symptoms are so extreme I want to end it every second of every day.  Not one moment of distraction.  It's like my brain is stuck in a non-stop intrusive thought.

 

I am severely kindled and it seems like those who suffer for a long time or indefinitely are kindled/CT/rapid taper.

 

I know everyone is different and "heals" at different times but at what point in time do you say screw it I've suffered for too long.

 

My intention was not to offend anyone by writing this.  I'm just trying to understand what keeps everyone going for so long.  I know based on how messed up my brain is right now I won't last years with the mental torment and terror 24/7.

 

 

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I don't find your post offensive at all. You're just being realistic. Early on in this ordeal, I had pretty much resigned to the fact that I will never fully recover.

 

I have tried to stay positive and I have been healing all along. But I  am a reality driven person...always have been. I'm going to say something that might contradict what I just said.......

 

What has kept me going? My faith. Faith in the knowledge that some day soon, I might very well see full recovery. Mental, physical, and emotional recovery from the damage that these drugs have caused me.

 

BB has been a great resource. Otherwise this journey would be even more difficult to deal with.

 

Do not be disheartened. Try to think on whatever progress you have made. It is a very slow process....benzo recovery. :)

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