Scared and frustrated

Hello all, 

 

  I went inpatient to a hospital thinking they could help me with not being able to function in life anymore with too many psych meds, and what they did was take me off of klonopin of which I was on for 15 years in 7 days....  It hasn't been a fun ride, I got home and almost immediately went back into another hospital where they put me on Abilify because I said I was "seeing things" which was really a shimmering and visual snow and the auditory stuff that was happening (and is still happening) is brutal. I can hear things from the wrong angle and it feels like I don't know how to process it, and sometimes I shake from noises that oscillate or are repetitive and it makes for a really uncomfortable life, where I feel like I just can't get away from it.  It causes massive anxiety and like I said, I feel like I'm just going to scream sometimes and want out. 

   

    And looking at screens is the same way, I feel like it's all cumulative and I can't seem to make it better.  Being on Rexulti actually took that away, but too many side effects, although I'm ready to jump back on because it's just bad living like this.  Anyone else going through this and is there a light at the end of the tunnel?  I feel like I get better then get worse at home here because I try new things or new meds and it works but then I get pulled from it and that makes things worse but I can't live like this necessarily.  I admire the rest of the work that's being done here, but it's so, so unpleasant. 

 

    If anyone has any advice I'll take it in a heartbeat.  Any kind of solace would be helpful.  Thank you!

Twocent,

 

Fifteen years on K is a long time. You have got to taper it. Reducing it by 10% every four weeks seems a popular choice. Cold turkey is not a good option.

 

Have you read Ashton? If not put it into search. Also use search for Sofakingdone. These will get you started on a plan.

 

Why not come back after you have read them.

 

It’s a long road but a brighter future is out there with help and support.

 

Best wishes

 

G

twocents short ( I like your screen name!)

 

I cannot advise tyou without more information. How long has it been since you took any Klonapin? What other psych drugs are you on now?

 

I do agree that vetting you off Klonapin will help you the most, in the long run. Benzos are insidious, and harm us greatly if we take them more than perhaps a month.

 

I think that was is happening to you is awful, because you placed your trust in physicians who don't really know much about benzos. I wish that wasn't true, but I know it is.

I think your best way is to get off ALL psych drugs as you can. Benzos are extremely dangerous drugs and cause so much harm that you don't know about it, as you are too young. I am 69. I took benzos nightly for insomnia. My overall health slowly went downhill and in 2012 I was forced to go CT off Klonapin, Ambien and 2 SSRIs. Holy hell ensued. It is now seven years since I went CT and I am so much healthier now, and my old depression and anxiety just faded away.

 

Can you tell me exactly what meds you are currently on/ NOT just psych meds, all of them. Can you tell me what your current symptoms are? How do you feel? What are you thinking and feeling? I will do my best to help you, but need more information. What I CAN tell you is that we do heal from this stuff, but for some of us it takes a long time. I took benzos for thirty years and my WD was awful, but I feel so much better now. I do not think I am all that unusual, either.

east

Wow I don't know how I didn't see this until now.  I didn't get any alerts...

 

I have no options about getting back on Klonopin.  My current regimen is:

 

Lithium

Lamictal

Ativan (they started this 3 weeks ago)

Geodon

Levothyroxine

BuSpar

 

Honestly, I have such light and sound sensitivity, that I've taken to trying to figure out which PC's and phone will work for me, and I kind of have a solution?  I shake, but not really.  It feels like I'm tremoring but if I hold a glass of water or whatever, I'm not.  But it gets bad.  I get waves of anxiety driving, and it feels like it's too  much to take.  Like too  much stimulus.  Honestly, I hate antipsychotics but right now it's holding me together.  I can't honestly handle the noise and light much, so it kind of keeps it together. 

 

I hate that it's taken my ability to just use devices.  It gives me the worst panic after such a short time, and it can take a long time to "come down" from that after using, say a laptop or a phone.  It seems like it's getting better with help from meds, but it's still so brutal.  I couldn't wean off anything if I tried right now, I'm a mess.  I'm getting by after 2 months, but it's not pleasant.  I suppose if I lived on a farm and had no real responsibilities it would be easier, as it stands I don't have a job now.  I'm not sure if this is what you needed, but I can't be near neon lights, I can hear the buzzing and it's too much, same with almost anything similar.  I "shake" after too much input but I'm working on it and the anxiety.  Thank you so much!

twocents, that is a horrible cocktail of drugs you are taking. Are you really sure you NEED all those drugs?

 

My entire heart goes out to you tonight. You have been poly drugged BIG TIME and I doubt any of those drugs have done you much good.

But lets take this one step at a time. First, recover from benzos, which are possibly the most dangerous drugs there are. Allow your brain time to heal from benzos and then start to work on getting rid of those other drugs.

This forum is not designed to help someone get off other psych drugs. We just deal with benzos here. But I do feel you need to consider ridding yourself of all those other drugs at some point.

east

It sounds like your experiencing PTSD symptoms which I've heard can happen with benzo withdrawal