Benzo Free for a Month--It Was Well Worth the Pain

For every single person here who is trying to get off these Benzo's, this is for you. You need to know that you can do this! I believe in you and so many people here do too. I came here having been on Xanax for three years, desperate for help in getting off. My doctor had no clue how to help me with this and so I was left mostly in the dark. I started tapering and did a partial cross-over to valium. Now I'm off both and feeling better than I have since starting these meds. I don’t remember the timeline of every cut, but I can tell you there were a few times that I cut 1/8 every 3rd or 5th day. That was tough but I had no choice and so I plunged forward. Other times I held a dose for 14 days, which in my experience is so much better physically/mentally. (In the beginning I held a dose for a shorter duration and saved the longer duration for when I was at a lower dose, towards the end of my taper). When I say I did a partial cross-over, I mean that I replaced my bedtime dose of Xanax (1mg) with 5mg of valium. That worked for me, though at first it was tough. I don't think the dosage was equivalent, but it's the best I could do, and it wasn't horrible. I can't say that I tapered the ideal way, but I just kept lowering the dose of Xanax until it was gone and I was only on valium. When I was down to 1.25mg valium I quit.

 

Once I quit, the withdrawal symptoms kicked into high gear. This is when you have to really reach inside and find every bit of strength you have. What I noticed is that all the withdrawal symptoms I experienced during the taper were amplified and no matter how exhausted I was, I couldn’t sleep. What helped me was a lot of positive self talk and knowing that this wouldn’t last forever. Hot baths, distraction, exercise (walking), lots of water, and eating healthier during this time were a few of the things I did to help.

 

Something else I went through was a very deep depression that lasted a few days. Thankfully I had read here that people do sometimes experience this, so I kept telling myself that it’s a symptom of quitting and it will pass. That’s exactly what happened. In fact, with all the symptoms I had, I told myself the same things. It’s not forever, it will get better, it’s normal when quitting. That’s what really got me through this-knowing that no matter how bad it felt, it was temporary.

 

My w/d symptoms lasted about 2 weeks, however the insomnia lasted longer. In fact, I still deal with bouts of that now. It’s better though, and I think it was towards the end of the third week when I noticed a big difference, in that I was able to get to sleep easier. I still don’t sleep all the way through the night, but I suspect that in time I will.

 

The payoff for quitting is so worth every single w/d symptom that I went through. We’re all different, but I can tell you that I didn’t realize how much of myself I had lost to this drug. I can best describe it as things were numb and now they’re not. It’s like awakening from some sort of foggy nightmare that I was stuck in. My memory was so bad, and I have noticed a huge improvement since quitting. I feel much more self-confident now. I set a goal that was damn hard, and I accomplished what I set out to do. That feels good, and the fact that this was so difficult only makes it that much better. I no longer feel that inter-dose withdrawal that is so common with these short acting benzo’s. I no longer have so many headaches. I don’t have blunted emotions and I’m not isolating myself from family and friends. It may sound strange, but in hind-sight I think that Xanax made me more paranoid and panicked. I also feel more energetic and not so tired all the time—vast enhancement. The list just goes on and on guys. It’s been a month and all of these things have improved. This is what you are fighting for; and though we’re all different in our tapering and healing process, there are some things that I think we all have in common as well. You will feel proud of yourself and you should!

 

Don’t give up!! Come here for support and keep on moving closer to your goal. If it takes you a year or longer, see your progress and not how much further you have to go. Try to keep a positive attitude as much as possible; it really does make a difference. Avoid anticipating symptoms because it only makes things more difficult. Remember that we’re all different, and each cut seems to be different as well. Finally, be good to yourself and remember that you’re body is recovering. With each cut, you’re moving closer to being free from benzo’s. You can do this!! I wish you much luck and I thank everybody who posted your journey. A special thanks to those who replied to my posts with support. I read far more than I posted, but I’m sticking around to help others out in any way possible.

 

 

Gobbles

 

I thank you for this.  I really needed this today.  It does seem endless. I do have to keep thinking positive to get to the other side.  Thank You again.  these posts are what we all need.  Linder

Thanks you Gobbles for posting such a positive success story!  You'll give hope to many who are afraid the pain has to last for years.  I'm very glad to hear you're going to stick around to help others through this, thank you!

 

Pam

 

 

What a wonderful post, thank you so much! 

 

 

Thank you Gobbles! And very happy for you. 

Hello Gobbles,

 

Wow! I just read your success story. I am in the taper process and found the words of encouragement to be very inspirational.

 

Summer

Thank you for that post - it is what all of us need to hear while going throught these taper w/d sx.  Sometimes I just want to give up, and I say I can't take it anymore.  But what's the alternative - we have to have hope............and your words have given it to us.  Thanks so much

for your encouraging words and congratulations to you.

Thanks for the success story Gobbles I really needed to read one today. 

 

Hugs

Kristin

Thanks so much for the story, it really gives me hope!!

 

Lizzie

Gobbles, your post rocked! Thank you for taking the time to write it. Those of us on the other side need to hear that it can be done and done successfully 

So happy for you 

 

Jean

Thanks for taking the time to post such an inspirational story, Gobbles! It's wonderful to see how well you are doing.

 

This post will be such an encouragement for anyone who reads it

I really appreciate you posting this - it gives me hope which is what I need.

 

Journey

It is so encouraging to read your story.  I am so happy that you are feeling well.   

Thank you,

Sunny girl

Gobbles,

Boy did I need to read that.    I am almost done with my taper and can't wait to be off of this.    Thanks for sticking around to help us out.

  Glad you are recovering