Author Topic: The daily micro taper Worked  (Read 2361 times)

[Buddie]

The daily micro taper Worked
« on: July 06, 2019, 05:27:55 pm »
I almost didn't come back to write this because I have been so busy living my life.  I think this happens ALL THE TIME which is why there are so few success stories.

I never really posted a lot on here but I was always reading and learning in the beginning.  It is where I learned about the micro taper.  I will be forever grateful.

Ill try to be brief in telling my story and I will use a lot of spacing because I remember how hard it was to read big continuous paragraphs.  I couldn't read and process information when things were at their worst.

Im a mom of 2.  Im in my 40s.  I was prescribed 1mg klonopin and took it daily as prescribed for about 5 years.  I told my dr I wanted off because I wanted to be med free.  I had no idea at the time my insomnia and digestive issues were tolerance.  My dr said I could safely taper in 4 weeks.  I did what he said and felt fine until I was 1 week off.  I went from feeling normal to having my life fall apart in a matter of days.

My ears suddenly started ringing.
My stomach distended painfully to the size of a 6 month pregnancy
I couldn't walk because of a boaty floaty sensation
everything was blurry and light hurt my eyes
fabric and air hurt my skin
sounds hurt my ears
I became detached from my own body...I didnt recognize my face in the mirror.
I felt detached from my kids.  I knew I was supposed to love them but felt no connection.
everything looked fake and plastic
I had an intense vibrating inside of me.  my hands shook and my limbs would suddenly jerk out.
And then the really bad stuff started...
An intense chemical anxiety I had never experienced before.  I thought I was dying.  My heart was pounding so intensely I was afraid to move.
I had a feeling of wanting to rip my skin off.  I wanted to run from my own body.  I couldn't be still.  It was absolute mental and physical torture.
I had this internal desire to end my life but I didnt want to die but something was pushing me to do it.  It was the scariest feeling in the world.  I was just a normal mom a few weeks earlier!

I lasted 4 weeks like this and then reinstated on 5mg of liquid valium and stabilized. (.25mf klonopin equivalent) After taking that first dose of valium all my symptoms stopped.  By this time I had found benzo buddies and knew what was happening to me.  I began a slower taper with the liquid but still had no idea what I was doing.

After 1 month I made a cut that was too big I think.  Everything fell apart.  ALL the symptoms came back along with new ones and nothing I did stabilized me.  I updosed back to 5mg and held for 3 months.  It did not help.  During this time I learned about the micro taper.  It was so hard trying to figure out the math.  Builder and Diaz-Pams old posts helped me figure out a plan.  Along with angels I met on FB groups I figured it out.

Within 11 days of starting to take out a tiny amount daily I noticed relief!  Very slowly I began to feel better.  3 months in to my micro taper I was able to take my son to a rock concert.  It was HARD but I still did it.  I didnt drive yet and the chemical anxiety feeling was still there but not as strong. 

All symptoms slowly faded as I tapered.  It took me 2 YEARS to taper 5mg of valium.  It sounds ridiculous but by the 2nd year I was living my life while tapering.  I had minor symptoms and had to be extremely careful not to overdo it physically but the terror was gone.

I finished my taper by taking the last possible drop and nothing bad happened after that last dose.  I am now almost 4 months off and it feels like a bad dream.  The only remaining symptom is the ringing ears and occasional brain fog and my hormones still seem messed up.

This is what I did:
I was using the liquid valium 1mg/1ml (or it sometimes say 5mg/5ml) just make sure its not the 5mg/1ml.
I would dilute 1ml of valium with 99mls of water.
I cut .01mg a day. (it took me 100 days to reduce 1mg of valium so 500 days to reduce 5mg valium)
Stir gently and cut 1ml out of the new mix on the first day.
Then the next day mix a new batch and cut 2ml
Then the next day mix a new batch and cut 3ml and so on.
I was only cutting 1mg at a time.  I would take the rest of my dose without diluting it.  It just made more sense to my brain at the time. 
I also switched to to dosing 3 and then eventually 4 times a day.  This was super important to keep the levels even in my blood.
I dosed the same time everyday.
I made sure I dosed on an empty stomach.  30 minutes before and after food.
I avoided all MSG and all cruciferous vegetables ( those veggies can make the valium detox out of your body faster)
I avoided all alcohol but continued to drink my one cup of coffee a day.
I held often in the beginning.  Small 2-4 day holds.  I had many setbacks but never returned to the completely horrific place I was in before starting the micro taper.
The one thing I needed above all else was PATIENCE.  I had to resist the urge to go faster.  I HAD to accept that this was going to take an ungodly long ass time.  That was really hard to do but once I accepted it things got easier.

Please know that where you are now will not be forever.  I have helped others start a micro taper and watched as their symptoms improved.  It is the only way off that is the least torturous way.  And if you go slow enough and your careful when you finish  there will be no symptoms that hit you.

Please look up the daily micro taper thread on here and learn.  Look up Diaz-pams old posts.  Look up Crash Bandicoots success story.  Valley Um was another one that made it using the micro taper.

IT WORKS

I made it.  Im done and Im OK.




Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: The daily micro taper Worked
« Reply #1 on: July 06, 2019, 05:59:40 pm »
[...],
Allow me to congratulate you on the long successful taper !!  The story is inspirational and right about now I needed it.  Next I'm going to read those prior posts for the progression towards today's amazing result.

You've got a lot to be proud of and thank you so much for sharing your success story !
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: The daily micro taper Worked
« Reply #2 on: July 08, 2019, 12:46:31 pm »
Congrats on your successful taper, well done.  :)
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: The daily micro taper Worked
« Reply #3 on: July 08, 2019, 02:01:53 pm »
What a great story! I'm glad you came back and shared. I've also found that DLMT makes a huge difference.
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: The daily micro taper Worked
« Reply #4 on: July 12, 2019, 09:08:45 pm »
Very inspirational story! Iím confused though because your symptoms reduced as you you started cutting the medication. Donít symptoms become worse usually?
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: The daily micro taper Worked
« Reply #5 on: July 16, 2019, 04:58:31 pm »
No if you go extremely slow your symptoms get better.  You have to reduce at a small enough rate that your brain or gaba receptors can up regulate too.  Just by taking tiny amounts its doable and your brain can heal itself on the way down.  Take out too big of an amount (even if you think its small) and your brain freaks out.  In the beginning of my micro taper if I cut just a fraction too much I would have an increase in symptoms. 

I tried cutting .015mg a day and had an increase in sxs but when I switched to cutting .01mg a day my sxs improved.  Such an incredibly small amount made the difference in my success.

This isn't just me.  Ive met and also read about so many people who were able to LOSE symptoms as they tapered down by doing it this way.

I wish everyone knew about this method.  You do not have to suffer. If you search on here you can find others that say the same thing happened :)
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: The daily micro taper Worked
« Reply #6 on: July 16, 2019, 05:02:34 pm »
Thank you for the info! I see in your signature that you took this med for anxiety. What happened to the original anxiety once you were off the med?
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: The daily micro taper Worked
« Reply #7 on: July 16, 2019, 05:32:52 pm »
Its incredible but its gone.  I think after having gone through the horrors of benzo withdrawal my body and mind just don't react the way they used to.  Before I took klonopin I would always have that tight anxiety feeling in my chest.  The benzo helped that in the beginning but it came back as I stayed on it.  When I was in withdrawal that tight chest feeling was magnified to such an extreme degree I did not think I was going to survive it.  And when it went away it just stayed away. 
I definitely have life stressors now that I'm off.  My daughter is dealing with an illness.  But Im just able to deal with things better now.
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: The daily micro taper Worked
« Reply #8 on: July 16, 2019, 05:50:33 pm »
What a great post!   Congratulations!!!

I too tapered using a daily liquid micro-taper.  Mine took about 18 months, and while it was not symptom free, I was able to smoothly walk off and am living my life without being benzo dependent.

I've found that I still get very anxious at times - but during my taper, I spent a good amount of time exploring alternative coping techniques and am finding that I am able to manage those episodes (when they occur) long enough to ride through them.

I also found that overall, I am less anxious.  I've lost most of my social anxiety, (which was very isolating & somewhat crippling), and generally feel more calm without benzos than I did while taking them. 

I wish doctors were more proactive with recommending these long micro-tapers - mine allowed me the freedom to taper on my own terms, (so for that I am grateful), but she has not changed her recommendations to others.  More people would try them (and some would find success) if they were presented as an option by caregivers.
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: The daily micro taper Worked
« Reply #9 on: July 16, 2019, 08:34:44 pm »
Congrats to you!!

I'm also doing the DLMT at a super slow rate of .01mg/day and have had great success with this method. It really CAN be done - I've still got a little bit left to go (am at 0.6mg now of Valium and getting closer and closer to walking off), but I too have felt better the lower I have gotten. I wish more doctors knew about this method as well - would save the world a LOT of suffering as opposed to forced tapers with massive cuts, which I have seen WAY too much of...
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.