Only one month off, but already healing

My one month milestone. Already sleeping better, all sxs starting to ease up. 6-7 hours of sleep a night getting to be a regular thing, on only melatonin and tulsi (and binaural beats). I'm thinking my healing will be a matter of another month or two, instead of years. I'm hoping. Still have some cog fog, which I'm hoping the neurofeedback will help clear up, and some aches, pains, muscle tension, and fatigue, but it's a tiny bit better everyday.

 

Don't know what I'm going to do with all the supplements I bought to ease the way. I spent a couple hundred bucks on a bunch of shit I ended up not needing after a couple weeks.

 

When I first came to BB, and saw all the horror stories, I was afraid that I was going to feel like crap for years, but it appears as though I'm one of the lucky ones, and am going to heal a lot faster than that. My therapist and I were mulling over the reasons that might be. I was in pretty good shape to start with, exercised more or less regularly, and and ate a mostly whole foods plant based diet BEFORE I CT'd. I thought maybe it was the smaller dose I was on, til I saw a lot of the stories of people on about my same dose, going through PAWS. So I guess it was just luck of the draw. I'm 59, and figured being older, a lifetime on and off of drug abuse, and 10+ years on benzos/Zs would hold against me, but apparently not the case. Thankfully, no cravings. I just wanted OFF this stuff.

 

Anyway, I'm grateful for BB. I learned a lot that I wouldn't have found out on my own, so thanks everyone. It does get better, and doesn't necessarily take years. I'm finally drug free, after all these decades. Yay me! Now if I could just get to the point where I can start drinking my husband's home brew again without a wave...I'm going to try one on the Fourth of July. Then again, maybe not. Depends on where the sxs are at that time.

 

You all have a great day. Wind to thy wings.

Great news Mayavata! I'm so happy for you.

Thank you, Lilyann. I actually feel really liberated. My whole outlook on life has changed. I seem to have finally found the serenity I've always sought, but has always eluded me. After 59 years of always fighting fighting fighting, I've finally gotten some peace as a result of this journey.

Mayavata that's awesome! I'm so happy for you! I'm really hoping on for 8 months to a year. It's nice to know it might be possible.  I'm bad at figuring out people's signatures sometimes. I'm curious what dose were you on and how many years? I was on the same med.

.25 mg K, and 10 mg Z once daily for over ten years. The only thing I've found triggering waves so far is stress. And caffeine, which I can easily avoid. Stress causes my neck muscles to seize up, the glands on my neck to swell and make swallowing difficult, and maxes out the brain fog. Like today. The building inspector is coming by, and I have to argue him out of something.

 

Last time this happened, I lost my checkbook and freaked out. So I can see I'm going to have to work on my stress management. I'd give it a couple months for complete healing at the rate I'm going.

That's awesome! I went back to caffeine even though I know its making me worse. I get grouchy if I don't have coffee but its def. messing me up more once I crash. I wonder how I would feel if I quit again. I don't think the brain fog will go away much either way. Oh well. We will see. I hope you keep updating your progress as I love success stories as I'm sure most on here do.

Now that the building inspector is gone, and we got our way, the mini-wave is almost over. Still more pain in my neck than usual, but the cog fog has cleared up, so I should be back to what passed for normal tomorrow. Stress is a killer during WD. I wonder if that doesn't keep some people from getting better faster. They're all stressed out about their condition, which just turns into a vicious cycle. I was not really stressed out too much during the first 4 weeks. Horrible as it was, I'd been through it before with other substances, and kind of knew what was coming. 

 

Spent the day in my greenhouse and yard, and then driving around with the puppy on our ATV. Fabulous day. (well, it got better after the inspector left, anyways - thank gods he wasn't an asshole) Perfect weather, which is rare up here. Seems like it's usually too hot or too cold. Got frost warnings coming for Thursday and Friday nights. Mountain weather is just flat-out bizarre. Fixing to drag my carcass to the yoga mat.

 

Ya'll have a great rest of your day! 

Hi Mayavata. I’m so glad you’re healing and “quickly”. I will be off one month tomorrow. Can I ask if your waves get less intense and shorter as time goes? The first two weeks was one long wave. Ever since I’ve had some hourly windows and the waves are definitely still there but they never go back to the intensity of the first two weeks. Today was mostly a window with just a couple of iffy parts. Each week seems to get just a little bit better but it is slow. Any feedback is appreciated. Thanks.

Fantastic!!  Healing quickly happens all the time.  They just aren't on the forum to post.  Way to go Maya.  Stay strong, you are almost to the other side!  It happens.

StayStrong - My waves are kind of weird. As I'm sure you know by now, BWD healing isn't linear. I have had waves that are little more than a bit of cog fog, and then later in the week, I had one that damn near laid me out with excruciating muscle spasms. I'm afraid there is no rhyme or reason to it. My waves are caused by food additives (last one caused by Better than Bouillon chicken flavor, they say there's no MSG in it, but it does have a lot of other fancy chemicals in it), and stress.

 

My waves vary greatly between mild and severe, sometimes worse than what I went through the first 4 weeks. But my windows are pretty long, so I try not to bitch too much. But they definitely aren't linear. I've only had 2 severe waves, one during the first 4 weeks, and one recently.

Thank you for your reply!

Congrats Maya! I’m so happy to hear about your healing! It does happen and it’s so important for us that do feel like we’re healing to shout it from the mountain tops to give the others hope! It’s not all doom and gloom! There is beauty that comes out of this very painful process! I too feel like I am healing every day! At about 3.5 months out I can feel my healing and I am SO THANKFUL to be free of The poison! I am SO HAPPY for you too!!! I honestly feel like we will all appreciate life so much more when we’re healed, I already feel such intense gratitude. I will never ever take feeling good for granted ever again!

Great job. The first month is challenging and it sounds like you are doing great. 7 hours of sleep a night is pretty solid at this point. Keep it up!