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Keeping what's left of your scrip(s)?


[Ma...]

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Just curious...how many of you are keeping what's left of your scrips after you jumped, CTd whatever? I should probably just toss mine, but I can't bear to. I haven't been tempted to get into them (well, I've gotten into the seroquel twice in the last 20 days, and really hate myself for it, got off that shit years ago), and I'm such a "just in case" sort of person. The thought of taking them back to the pharmacy for disposal just sends me into a real anxiety state. I suppose I really should get rid of them.

 

Took a third of a 25mg seroquel last night, and I feel really awful today. But it did feel good to get a solid 8 hours of sleep. Horribly groggy today. I'm really annoyed at myself for doing it, but when I do break down and take a small piece, reminds me WHY I quit taking it, and firms up my resolve for at least another couple of weeks. I had stated somewhere else that I don't touch that stuff anymore, but here I am again.

 

About a year ago, I had a sleep specialist tell me that, unfortunately, some people just don't sleep well. Not what I wanted to hear. Sleep is the great escape. I wonder if my brain is just so damaged from the drug abuse in the past that I'll never sleep 8 hrs solid ever again, and I should just own that, and get the hell over it.

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Imo, it's best to get rid of the pills if you really intend to stay off.  I kept some xanax around for three months, and though I never took a rescue dose, I considered it.  So, when I finally disposed of the pills, I felt free of them at last.  Though my healing period was long and very difficult, I never regretted getting rid of them.

 

:smitten:

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I threw bottles of Xanax away in week two, I have a few bottles left.  I have not wanted one since CT.  If I begin to want one, I will get rid of them.  I’m terrified of kindling and going through this again.

 

SaraSue  :smitten:

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SaraSue - I'm only at day 20, but determined not to go through this again. A 4 week acute withdrawal period is just ridiculous. I could have gotten off heroin in less time. Not being able to have tea, coffee or chocolate is annoying as all get-out. Having to worry about what the next thing to go down my gullet that may cause a wave is very disconcerting. Nope, not doing this again.
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Keep the pills.  I still have mine and I've been off 52+ months.  That's how I quit smoking, too.  As long as I had cigs in my house I didn't smoke.  When they weren't there I died for a cig.  It was the same with the pills.  As long as I have them on hand I don't want them.
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I still have half a bottle of clonazepam somewhere. The only reason I haven't gotten rid of it is because I always thought it would be great to figure out a creative way to destroy it.

 

Always thought it would be fun to incinerate it by sending it up in a firework mortar or something.

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[fd...]

It's hard to let go, especially in acute. If it's helpful to know that they are there, maybe it's ok for you.

 

As far as Seroquel I get it, hate it, have used it in the past. Sleep is important. What I see is that you are being really, really hard on yourself. You've just done something amazing, give yourself some credit. A few Seroquel a month is pretty damn good. I mean, I hate the side effects but you just got off benzos and it's been 20 days. That's amazing, focus on that.

 

I use, specifically, iRest for sleep which is a yoga nidra sleep recording that changed my life. Heaps of research on this specific program, just in case you want to try it. https://www.irest.org/accessirestprogramforsleep

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I still have mine. Teva clonazepam, 0.5mg. I hear they're discontinued now and everyone seems to want them. But of course, these are almost 8 years old. I kept them all, just in case, and never took one. Same when I quit smoking. Kept the four or five packs I still had left in the carton, and also one open pack, half empty. Kept them for 5 years like that. Never smoked one. Just stopped one day and never lit another. But I kept them around until I sold my house and moved. I don't know why. I guess it's like skatootle said:

 

As long as I have them on hand I don't want them.

 

I did finally toss the old cigs, but I'm not quite sure how to dispose of the clonazepam. I hear you're not supposed to flush them. They end up in the drinking water. I thought maybe I could grind them up and sprinkle them on the lawn. Maybe the grass would grow slower and I'd wouldn't have to mow it every Friday after work. It's too hot.

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I have kept what's left of mine which is 11 0.5 clonazepam.  Haven't wanted to use them since a couple weeks after jumping.  Don't even want to mess with the smallest chance of getting to where I got again. Keeping them is just a reminder that never again will they have power over me.  I have the power now.
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I'm sure I have 250-300 mg diazepam, and some remeron.

 

And I occasionally take a small dose of diazepam (air travel, med diagnsotic procedures, etc) and occasionally a little remeron for sleep.

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  • 3 weeks later...
I got rid of my Valium the day after I jumped. I knew I would take a rescue dose at the first sign of trouble. Sane with my clonazepam. But that was easy because it backfired on me and did the opposite. I don’t regret it now but perhaps in the future. Anyway I told my pdoc no new scripts for me no matter how much I beg. I don’t want a repeat of a ruined life.
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