1 month free of clonazepam

 

I have been waiting to make this post for several years!

 

I was started on clonazepam at age 24 during a mental health crisis. I have a history of PTSD, depression, and anxiety. I took 1.0 mg for approximately 5 years and then 1.5 mg for 9 months. When I went to nursing school, I realized I wanted to come off it forever. Before I went to nursing school, I was a researcher in the field of cognitive neuroscience. I knew about the multiple recovery timelines. There’s the amount of time it takes to get the drug out of your system, and the amount of time for your GABA receptors to become upregulated after being downregulated for so long. This requires your body to make more GABA receptors. I knew that I wanted a very long taper so I could recover at about the pace my nervous system recovered. I tapered using a compounding pharmacy over the course of 2.5 years. I started off reducing by 0.1 mg and then I had severe symptoms around 1.0 mg including suicidal thoughts, hallucinations, insomnia, sweats, diarrhea, and tremor. So then I started experimenting with doses. I eventually settled on reducing by 0.02 mg every 10 days. Going faster than that, i had more intense physical symptoms.

 

I made peace with accepting that this is the least bad outcome in a bad situation and accepting this was the least likely to give me post acute withdrawal syndrome. I learned to accept to live in a moderately uncomfortable state for 2.5 years. It sucked but I did it. I was tempted to cold

Turkey it, but I knew that could cause sensitization/kindling and ultimately make me feel worse, so I didn’t.

 

The things that helped me:

1. Hydroxyzine before bed

2. Clonidine before bed

3. Vigorous cardiovascular exercise including hot yoga, running, and Pilates every other day up to five times per week

4. Eating a diet rich in complex carbs (low carb made my withdrawal 10x/worse), fruits, and vegetables

5. Complete avoidance of alcohol and caffeine

6. Regular counseling

7. Sensory deprivation tank once or twice per week

8. Having a job and hobbies that are distracting

9. Lexapro 20 mg daily

 

I took my last compounded pill on 04/20/19. I had a bit more insomnia and hot flashes when I stopped, but it was doable. Hot flashes and intermittent insomnia are all I deal with now. I am extremely sensitive still to caffeine and alcohol and avoid them

 

I’ve had to learn all over again how to manage my emotions, express my emotions, and cope with my emotions. I have a much richer emotional life, better memory, got rid of sleep apnea, am a better driver, and feel much more alive. It’s been the hardest thing I’ve ever done.

 

Wow congrats on getting off! You seem to be doing pretty well a being just a month off compared to most stories on here. I'm curious on what you know about these meds and the brain do you believe the brain can heal from benzo w/d while on other psych meds? Many people on here have suggested no but I'm on other meds I can't come off of now. This terrifies me that I will stay in this state.

Buddy86,

Wow........ congratulations. !!  I'm only a month in on tapering from the big K thus reading success your success story is a boost ! 

Breck

As of today, I'm only a month off, but it's very liberating to reach this milestone with a minimum amount of trouble. I'm sleeping just fine with only melatonin and tulsi, and my sxs are getting better everyday.

 

Congrats! I think one month (although you are at two as of this post) is a pretty important milestone. My next milestone I'm looking forward to is a year.

HURRAY! I am SO thrilled for you, Buddy86! Your post — so logical and comforting both at the same time (PERFECT combination for a nurse!) — just gave me SO MUCH hope. THANK YOU!

 

Also, just out of curiosity...can you elaborate on the Clonidine a bit? What dose were you taking, what was it for, how did it work, and are you still taking it? Clearly it must be safe for the GABA receptors for a nurse/researcher to have made it a part of her daily WD regimen — I am sure you vetted it like a MOFO as only a brilliant nurse/researcher could! HA! Anyway, I am interested in hearing a bit more. Also, what were some of the symptoms you endured? Thank you SO much for telling your story and giving hope to those of us still making our way through.

 

xoxo

Neely

Wow congrats on getting off! You seem to be doing pretty well a being just a month off compared to most stories on here. I'm curious on what you know about these meds and the brain do you believe the brain can heal from benzo w/d while on other psych meds? Many people on here have suggested no but I'm on other meds I can't come off of now. This terrifies me that I will stay in this state.

Sunlit,

I take 50mg of sertraline (zoloft) and have pretty much healed. Im almost 8 months off ativan.